~Kiss in the rain

Union of virility and feminity

Pelting droplets in the lane;
Virile mars walks in rain.
Going where his footsteps led..
He stretches the umbrella over his head.

Defending himself against the critical droplets,
With a guarded formidable exterior,
Backbone made from a rod of steel..
Striving towards his goal with a zeal.

His breath is caught in his throat,
As he watches venus moving as a bolt.
Water washes over her lovely face,

Chilly wind blows away his defence from his grasp;
Replaced by her tender understanding hands..
She tiptoes ,whispering kindly in his ears
"Life is not waiting for the storm to pass dear,
It is learning to dance in the rain"
Brushing her soft lips against his..
They reach a state of bliss..
Yearning droplets flow from their tangled bodies..
Shimmering as some glittering rubies..

Lightening strikes her twice;
He fiercely hugs her tight.
Answering her relieved sigh-
"It was not a flash which came by,
But a realisation that- you are only mine"

The thunder roars his approval..
At the union of Mars and venus so real..!!
On the blessed earth's surface..
The almighty divinely paired,
Our human race.....

Author's Note

A concept of Mars and venus;masculinity and feminity- the primal pair.. Questions were raised am i a man- hater,ha ..:) so here it goes- the combination of both,blended together into a tale.Hope you like the taste..

Reviews

[Ashira Macy]

I loved this poem, it draws the reader into the story as though you are in the rain with these two lovers, observing their heartfelt union. The personification of Mars and Venus was also a beautiful touch.

I had a couple of suggestions (if you don't mind) one of which was that you may want to capitalize Mars and Venus throughout the poem as they are names.

The only other thing I saw was this: "His breathe is caught in his throat"

Breathe should be breath.

I love the romance and can't wait to read more of your work!

[Sophy Freebirds]

I will correct the breath.. ASAP.. but the mars and venus are masculinity and feminity- if you go deep into the metaphors- like rod of steel,defending droplets and kind hands for venus you can unwrap their characters :) i have taken care of that. Thanks for your refreshing review Ashira

[Ashira Macy]

No problem dear, you did a wonderful job!

[Sophy Freebirds]

Thanks girl :)

[MsJewel]

You have created some lovely images.
They reach a state of bliss..
Yearning droplets flow from their tangled bodies..
Shimmering as some glittering rubies..

Stunning, stunning poetry.
:) Julie

[Sophy Freebirds]

Thank you so much Julie for your lovely review.I am humbled :)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

This is the ultimate tale of romance between two soulmates… a really beautiful piece of poetry.

[Sophy Freebirds]

Wow.. glad you appreciate it Cowboy... :)

[The Rock And Roll Cowboy(REBEL WITH A CAUSE)]

You are welcome :)

[Happy hours]

It was not a flash which came by,
But a realisation that- you are only mine... I love these live...creatively written :)

[Sophy Freebirds]

Thank you Anshul for your words. :)

[SquinklaPsyOps]

I am glad to read this. This form is the most artful, always has been, always will be. And you do it flawlessly. And the nostalgic feelings in this are so embracing.

[Sophy Freebirds]

Wow.. thanks squink.Do appreciate your words.

[J. K. Beach]

Sophy--I love the pictures that your writing paints here so well, but, for me, the theme, the idea that life does not wait for the storm to pass so we must learn to dance in its lovely drops of rain, is such a poignant and beneficial one, that the rest of your words just serve to reinforce it... Excellent job!

[Sophy Freebirds]

Thank you so much JK :) glad you liked it.

[Lyan]

Good writing,I liked it! I felt like I was reading a mini story.

[Sophy Freebirds]

Thank you lyan :)

[BlueDreams]

Wow what a great poem! I am all amazed by the beautiful detailing that pictures everything so perfectly :) Great write dear :)

[Sophy Freebirds]

Thank you so much swappy ;)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

I like the tale...at times I feel too much male dominance expressed, some males feel they must do that...
but there is acceptance on both sides, and love.

[Sophy Freebirds]

Yeea.. that is what i wanted to express. Thank you for your thoughtful words . :)

[Matching Socks]

Man-hater? Lol! I earned that rep once too. :-)
Loved this one Sophy, and we don't think it's a matter of being a man hater so much as being a jerk hater.

[Sophy Freebirds]

You very well pointed out the difference n***a.. :) thank you for your encouraging words.

[Matching Socks]

Lol! :) anytime.