hope

every second that goes by

here in the silent tears i cry

i long to hear your voice

saying it will be alright

i know the choices i must make

i know that they are no mistake

but i cry even so

surrounded by your scent

with your image in my head

i can make myself believe

you are here sitting with me

your hand in mine

there is peace sublime

but when i open my eyes

this lie i have told myself 

become known

and again i cry….

have i made a mistake

will she make you go away again

will i have to remain in silence

without you 

my love, my friend

here i stand

begging God again

someone tell me if i have hope

that i will have you today

whispering you love me

that she won't take you away

i still miss you

even though i have you

i still know your mine

even though i am lost in peace sublime

so i imagine

your arms around me

you eyes gazing into mine

and you are there

you'll never go

you are here

and i have hope

this will be

my always and forever

and i will be

truly safe from any never

Reviews

[A.j. Dru]

This is a good one. I like the flow and the emotional content.

[marie]

thank you:)

[Sir Joseph]

I absolutely love this! :)

[marie]

Yay!!:) so glad you do!!:)

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

Love the raw emotion used here, well done :)

[marie]

thank you:)

[Mr Dunne Poetry]

You're welcome :)

[marie]

:)

[Ashley G.]

You still need to capitalize some things. Also, just out of curiosity, are you writing just for the heck of it or are you writing about your boyfriend? If you don't mind me asking.

[marie]

my boyfriend, anad the fact that my mom seems intent on making sure i NEVER have my phone so i can't talk to him, she never leaves us alone, and she gets upset when i even hug him

[Ashley G.]

*grimace* it's just a hug. But then banana and I freak out when we see couples hugging so...I have no room to talk, meow.

[marie]

you two NEED to get a guy or something!! you'd stop freaking put and just smile:)lol

[Ashley G.]

oh god, does banana know you said that?!

[marie]

she was reading over my shoulder as i wrote that:) and btw, it is TRUE!!!

[Ashley G.]

What did she do? *ignores last comment*

[marie]

ITS TRUE ITS TRUE ITS TRUE!! SOOOOO TRUE!!! oh and she just looked a t me like really and then rolled her eyes:)

[Ashley G.]

Hmm. I expected a more dramatic reaction from her like trying to strangle you or something....Anyway, Study first; boyfriends later. Maybe.

[Ashley G.]

Sara's just shaking her head at me as she reads this....

[marie]

why? what does she think? tell her HE"S MINE!!!!

[Ashley G.]

She read the comment string we're writing; not the poem! She's shaking her head at my idea of when to get a boyfriend.

[marie]

*mutters* you need one... shall i speak with a certain someone? :)

[Ashley G.]

NOOO!

[marie]

hmmm is that a yes? well he hangs out around my grandparents church on wed. maybe i'll go and "visit" them:)

[Ashley G.]

Nuh-uh, please don't. I'll die of embarrassment.

[marie]

technically you can't die of embarrassment so i'm saying you'll be fine:)

[Ashley G.]

...*sticks tongue out* bleh

[marie]

yay!! she said yes!!:)

[Ashley G.]

What?! No I didn't! That was totally a no. N-O- spells no!

[marie]

hoorah!! oh halcien where are you?:)

[Ashley G.]

oh my god. I could strangle you. You realize you put that on the internet, right?

[marie]

YEP:) *smiles proudly*

[Ashley G.]

Wait, you do realize you spelled his name wrong? It's Halcyon. Halcyon Morgan, to be precise.

[Ashley G.]

By the way, this comment and the previous one was not Ashley. This is Ethale taking over Ashley's account for the moment.

[Ethale Captor]

There. Back to my account.

[Ethale Captor]

You never know when I may be in disguise.

[Ashley G.]

Mwyhahahaha!

[marie]

ahhhh!!!! shape shifting oreo!!!

[Ashley G.]

Hahahaha! If anyone who didn't know our group read that they would be soooo confused! (A...shape-shifting...oreo?)

[marie]

lol yeah.... not exactly straight foreward:) (and yes oreo is shape shiftingXD)

[Ethale Captor]

But am I?

[marie]

pretty sure you are....or not.... grrr STOP MESSING WITH MY HEAD!!!!

[Ashley G.]

But she loves messing with your head. =3

[marie]

......still doesnt mean she should

[Ethale Captor]

But I usually do anyway.

[marie]

its wrong.

[Ethale Captor]

So is everything else I do.

[Ashley G.]

*looks at the two in exasperation* sigh...

[marie]

not everything...

[Ethale Captor]

Pretty much everything.

[Ashley G.]

.....=/#$%%$@$^...........

[Ashley G.]

marie cussed using my computer...just so you know.

[Ashley G.]

s*** why did you tell them?! F***

[Ashley G.]

You didn't stop me. AND STOP using my computer to cuss on the internet! =/

[Ashley G.]

f****** NO!!!

[Ashley G.]

......To those who may be wondering I do NOT have a split personality my friends just seem to like using my account to confuse each other....

[marie]

confused? who's confused? are you my dear?....no? *sarcastically* oh of course not:)

[Ashley G.]

=P

[Ethale Captor]

That escalated quickly.

[Ashley G.]

What?

[marie]

or did it? 0o

[Ethale Captor]

I believe it did, or did not. Do you not agree?

[marie]

possibly 0o

[Ashley G.]

Now, I'm seriously getting confused...=/

[Ethale Captor]

You shouldn't, it is slightly confusing, only confusing to those capable of getting confused over confusing things, which this is not.

[Ashley G.]

I get confused easily like you probably already know...

[Ethale Captor]

It is still rather fun to toy around like this.

[Ashley G.]

True...

[marie]

its just fun to toy around wiht you in general rinjii so deal with it!! confusion is as confusion was and shall always be clear as day except to those who are confusing themselves then it is simply either plain or impossible in your case its impossible but still its possible that it is while its not

[Ashley G.]

'with' not wiht =p

[marie]

no!! its a new word so wiht !! i will say and i shall say it again wiht

[Ashley G.]

...ooookay...anyway, anyone else notice that we've held this conversation for a week?

[Ethale Captor]

I have.

[marie]

I've had one that went on for a month!!:) personal record😏

[Ethale Captor]

Interesting.

[marie]

now your just posting words so i wont get mad at you for not talking..

[Ethale Captor]

Perhaps. The main reason I am posting is when I occasionally come read what many comments have been posted in my leave, I like to leave what would be like a bookmark. That bookmark would be my comment, as well as my alteration to the conversation.

[quinfinn]

utterly beautiful!

[marie]

thank you:)!!

[Nick.B]

Very raw and emotional at the same time...well done showing your feelings on this one

[marie]

thank you:) i am so glad you liked it:) this one is kind of close:)

[RachelReaper]

i loved this because it was so full of raw emotion and it flowed really, really well. Excellent job with this! Kind of sounds like a similar situation I'm in... sigh...

[marie]

thank you for the review:) i'm glad you liked it, feel free to talk about your situation, maybe it could help me in mine, and maybe mine could help you....anyway thanks again for da review:)

[StayAnchored]

It is so beautiful! I love the message and the flow! Great job :)

[marie]

thank you:) soo glad you liked it:)

[CreativeStroke]

This was a beautiful poem, but I think it would benefit even more with some capitalization of your i's and some breakdown of your lines. i think it would flow better and bring out the best in this poem. That is just a suggestion so please don't change anything unless you want to! Anyway, I loved the message behind the piece... it was wonderful. Thanks for sharing this one Marie.

[marie]

thank you for the review, i think i will take your advice, any lines in particular you suggest?:)

[CreativeStroke]

I would go through and just read it and see how the flow falls in your opinion and that's where I would break it apart into separate stanzas... if that makes any sense to you.

[marie]

that makes tons of sense thanks for the help:) i'll send you a request the second i put it up:)

[Ethale Captor]

An amazing write of strong emotion packed into a short write. Nice job.

[marie]

thank you:) i'm glad you liked it:)

[Ethale Captor]

No problem.

[marie]

:)