unreal bliss

i close my eyes 

see a moonlit face

your loving smile 

takes my breath away

i can still feel 

your lips on mine

can't believe this is real

i'm lost in time

trials we face

will all fade away

in gods lasting grace

we are free to stay

with your arms around me 

his promise in my soul

i know forever 

i will be whole

can't imagine life another way

can't believe this is real

can't believe your here to stay

the perfection is unreal

your eyes in mine

my heart in yours

the moonlit sky

upon hopes shore

no worries in your strong embrace

i've never felt

so truly safe

can i say this is true

a spark from heaven above

i'm lost in your caring eyes

i think i'm stripped of my disguise

for the first time

for the best time

and i know 

that nothing more is needed

i'm content inside your eyes

blown away by your kiss

lost within your eyes

for the first time

Reviews

[Sir Joseph]

You put to words exactly what i felt as well!! :) your skills amaze me daily!

[marie]

Aww:) thank you😊

[Sir Joseph]

No, thank you :)

[marie]

For what?:)

[Sir Joseph]

Everything:)

[marie]

again, awwww:)

[A.j. Dru]

Nice work. I think my only suggestion is to add some imagery. The only physical thing that stands out to me is the "moonlit sky". Not that this is a bad piece. I love it. I'm more or less recommending that you draw upon more physical detail, something the reader can conjure up in the mind and make real, next time. We live in a physical world and that's what sticks. That's what make us remember a certain poem when we're reminded through experience. I think this is a really nice piece though. Good job. Keep writing.

[marie]

thank you:) i may just have to go back and edit it some, now that you've pointed it out i see how this wouldn't stick out in peoples minds, thank you for pointing that out, i will most definitely take this into consideration:)

[Ashley G.]

I love the love poem! Keep up the good work!

[marie]

thanks for the review:) i'm glad you liked it:) and you keep the good work up as well churro:)

[Ashley G.]

'kay, Tortilla.

[marie]

:)

[Tarry Franck]

Emotional and to the point - Love it :)

[marie]

Thanks for the review:)

[Dolfury Nixie Ritter]

I love how clear it is. No hidden meaning, just plain jane love poem. I love how it shows the speaker has been changed by this love for the other person, and how mutual they make it sound. Good job!

[marie]

Thank you for the review:) and yes it has changed us both:)

[Lina Grey]

this is so sweet! the emotion is clear and wonderful. great job ~em

[marie]

thank you so much:)

[luviva]

wow,
this is soo good
the emotion, love,trust and confidence you have in him
is just so wonderful and you have poured your heart out there for every single teenager to read.
its so beautiful how you express the feeling of falling in love i gues!
well writtem

[marie]

thank you:)

[Aly]

I love it.
It is an absolute lovely poem :)

My only suggestion is

when you get to the part

"Can't believe"


In my mind I added "I can't believe"

just a suggestion. Great job! Keep writing!

Aly

[marie]

thank you for the review:)

[StayAnchored]

This is a beautiful poem!! I love it :)

[marie]

thank you :) i'm glad you like it :)

[Phillitup]

My only suggestion would be completely optional, it's considered an authors choice. Some people prefer to keep I's capital but if you are not one of them, feel free to encourage baby i's. I think this is emotional and holds a lot of things. That is all I truly have to say about this piece. Nicely and eloquently penned.
Best regards,
Dell

[marie]

thanks for the suggestion i really just got lazy while writing it out, but i'll go back and fix it