letters to prvt aldrich

a war story based in Germany in 1912.This is just the start to my story and if people like it then i will continue to write more =]

The smoke rose from the firing pits as usual.It was day 16 in the trenches,the smell of dead bodies and gun fumes hung to the inside of my nose.My name is private jeremy aldrich and right now i was fighting a war that i  had no chance of coming out alive from.It is 1912 and we are in ascheurg a place just outside of dortmund germany.

Every night i fall asleep to the ringing sound of screams and explosions so loud you feel your ears are about to bleed.Nobody cared for me here,no one to comfort you when the nightmares get so bad that you wake up screaming.No this wasnt a place for the faint hearted but for men with no fear of death or excruciating pain and nothing to live for,nothing to keep you going.I was different i had somethin well someone waiting for my return,the only thing that keeps me going through all of the hate and anger that i face in this godforsaken place.People dont often return from wars like these but the ones who do arent so lucky,they return to thier homes with such severe illnesses and fears that they spend the rest of thier lives in an asylum.Im not one to judge but i would rather die fighting for my country than return not a hero but a quivvering bag of nerves.

Reviews

[Midnight_Mask]

I enjoyed the read, I'll love to read more.
Just need to split that last paragraph in to two and mind out on your grammar. Don't forget, present tense, not past n present. good write hun, continue please =D

[WriterSki7]

Seems you are off to a good start. needs improvement also comes to mind. You're not the best but definitely not the worst. So far, so good.