IN THE EVENINGS..

a poem...

IN THE EVENINGS…

 

I would have made a world

Where my hut will have

Only one room…

Made of books instead of bricks

 

Spirits of Eliot and Emma

Will visit me every night

Charles Dickens will..

Share my bed..

 

Dostoevsky will teach me

How to distill poems and stories

By mating with a consciousness

That is collective and unique..

 

Sigmund Freud will train me

To eavesdrop into the secret

Behind the great minds’ greatness

To unravel their mystery..

 

With Wanton Chekhov

I shall go for a morning stroll

Into the wilderness..

To weave new stories..

For the rest of the day…

 

Evenings…

I spend with the inmates

Of this Writer’s café…

My only friends..

My only living friends…!!!

 

I toddle with my quill

My tender fingers, fledglings..

Always struggling…

To hold it steadily..

 

My fingers..

Have not yet mastered..

The art of wielding it…

To articulate my inner world

 

Yet, I keep on tottering…

With a mind, boozy…

From the goblet of optimism…

And my quill join in the orgy..

 

Friends…help me….

Help me to remain intoxicated..!!!!

Forever…!!!

Reviews

[SoLongAndThanksForAllTh..]

This poem is a revealing expose of the narrators favourite writers and also a study of what makes us write and what inspires us.

The main theme of this poem is one of completely emerging oneself in the literary craft. By physically surrounding herself with a room made of books the narrator is almost saying to us that she is blocking out the rest of the world and replacing it with literature. This is a world where friends are great authors, "With wanton Chekhov I shall go for a morning stroll" and even perhaps lovers, "Charles Dickens will.. Share my bed"!

From the opening stanzas which deal with reading the poem then moves onto writing. There is a very different feeling here. One of uncertainty and a maybe even a lack of confidence. Even the very act of getting words onto paper seems new and different as she describes her fingers as "fledglings".

This poem has a good structure and some nice images: I particularly enjoyed the metaphor of literature being likened to alcohol. Structurally however I have to agree with Coral that the punctuation detracts from the overall poem. I'm not a subscriber to the excesses of the punctuation police but an ellipsis followed by three exclamation marks suggests some kind of desperation or lack of confidence in what has been written. Be confident, your words are enough!

This poem seems to have struck a chord with many writers here and I enjoyed reading it and the concept that we are "inmates" here at Writers Cafe really made me chuckle.

[Tracie D'Angelo]

Oh I love this one!! Fantastic job!! I love the way your world is built upon writers and so self consciously you pick up the pen yourself. I love the last stanza! Sometimes writing and words and stories and all of it can really be intoxicating! Super job!

[Huggy Bear]

Two thumbs up:)

[joe shmo]

Neat poem!

[Holly O'Brien]

I love love love it!!!♥ You definitely dug deep and brought forth this one. This has soulful meaning to it and I enjoyed every single line. It has intelligence mixed with a down to earth tone. Another favorite now lol....keep it up!!!

My Favorite stanza was:

"Dostoevsky will teach me
How to distill poems and stories
By mating with a consciousness
That is collective and unique.."

[Richard Williams]

This is a good lesson here, to keep company with literary greats and to stay high on the joy of writing. Your cafe' friends to provide the potable, still.

[Miss Coral]

What a wonderful write! :)
I too wish that I could live in a hut of books and do nothing but read and write- that would be a wonderful life. c:

I would recommend using more punctuation than ellipses- I find them distracting, and make everything seem more like a ponderance rather than a statement. It weakens the writing when used that often. Also, coupled with the exclamation points, it seems oddly disjointed. Otherwise, this was great. Nice write. :)

-Coral-

[Akshat♥]

this poem is nicely written.forgot about the words...feelings made everything right...tc:)

[Black Cat Fever]

I love this, intoxicated on words! Very clever poem.

[dovetailer]

how could we help but be inspired in a hut made of books...nothing to do but read and be inspired to write...learn from those we all love to read...
I think that is what Thoreau had in mind at Walden Pond...
You are a romantic and a dreamer...
you dream...you write...we read...we share your dream...