INFATUATION AFTER MARRIAGE

After marriage infatuation... when committed people fall in love....

INFATUATION AFTER MARRIAGE

 

I have not seen such a love

He looks at me like a dove

His eyes on me very keen

Such a love, I have not seen

 

But never tells that he loves me

But hide in my ways to see me

He knows he cant escape my eyes

But me never tells that he loves.

 

Why do you hide your love?

Why are you clam like a cow

Like a cat you prowl in my head

Your love why do you hide?

 

Thus he disclosed one day

With calmness came his say

I am Mr Beens of Mrs Beens

He disclosed one day thus

Your spell kicked off my heart

Your charm shattered me apart

Your spell kicked off my commitment

Your spell kicked off my heart.

 

I must go my beauty, now I must go

My commitment I must not forego

I must not yield to my mind, naughty

I must go,now I must go my beauty.

 

Not to see his tears, he turned back

Only if I could utter what I wanted to ask!!

That was my first love that was he.

His tears, he turned back, not to see.

Why did you fancy me then?

Why did you covet me then?

Why dint you feel shy?

You did fancy me then, why?

 

Reviews

[Samantha Young]

I didnt really understand this poem...I'm sorry :/

[WriterSki7]

eight stanzas, four lines each. AABB type rhyme. A most interesting poem regarding relationships. I think it's about a passionless marriage, or denial, or perhaps adultry? Regardless, you did a good job. Surely you don't need me here to tell you that.

[James Watts]

This is sad and confusing in points, but I enjoyed the read.

[deeps]

I think this is a beautiful write.
I love the ending of this.
Something to ponder on.

[Bhavya Kaushik]

Ah! This was beautiful, the concept and the plot..its very different and at the same time very well executed.

[Bette]

i like the idea of this there are a few things that need a little work but i am sure that you will get it

[The Analog Kid]

Needs some refining. Great theme. I hear you loud and clear. Nice observation here!

[Huggy Bear]

Really great piece:)

[A.Lee]

Nice work on this piece. I think it could use a little polishing, but overall it has a good feel to it. I like the way you reiterated the first and last lines of each stanza.

[RDOriginal]

This is a very sad poem but to me it pulls the punches a little. The act of betrayal to both mistress and partner/wife seems weakened when you refer to it using magical themes (spell and charm). What has been done is an act wilfull wickedness - this description seems to lack passion, has what's been done simply sleight of hand? What I do like about the poem is how it transitions from the emotional to the betrayal and then to the questioning phase, it catches the whole relationship well.