The Slug

It is never a happy ever after

It wasn’t always that a slug has an interesting moment in its life. Everything is just slow and sluggish. I never had any expectation of tomorrow, never had an expectation of today, never really had any expectation since I was able to understand the world. Neither the pessimist nor the optimist. It’s not always that a slug goes to socialise, to have fun or to be around other living things. My mood was a bit off normal today. I slowly got sick of being a little alone and not having many friends and not having a lady company. I wanted the impossible things in life today. I wasn’t too sure as to why but it was just that kind of a day I guess? So, I sluggishly made my way down the road to join other living things and have a bit of fun. Surprised that there were so many souls alive in one place; snakes, snails, flies, lizards, frogs… I can keep naming, the list in infinite. At least it was to me. it was so alive and filled with so much life. Panic set in but I fought it and I found a place to get comfortable. Normally in a slug’s life, every single thing surrounding it is super slow which is normal to us. But today I felt different. I was getting obnoxiously light headed. Things just kept rising in speed and I couldn’t keep up with it all. I shifted my focus at the door, the only thing that didn’t seem to move. It stayed lifelessly still. I stared at it for a good while. Blinked once. Blinked twice. Blinked a couple more times. Then the doors started to move too like it had been given life in a blink of an eye. It was all too overwhelming. I wanted to leave. I wanted to get far far away. This was the only thing on my mind until I laid my eyes upon the most magnificent creature I’ve ever witnessed walk the earth. I slowed down. Slower than slow. My eyes didn’t move. My heart skipped beats. My mouth hit the floor. My antennas reached for the sky. My body froze. I had no words for it, no description, I was dumbfounded. She moved her body side to side, my eyes followed. She moved her feet back and forth with every step, my eyes followed. Her beautiful brunette hair swayed, my eyes followed. She moved and my heart followed.

I didn’t know what happened. I sat back and looked into nothingness even though there was chaos all around. I wasn’t attentive to what was happening. Those living souls moved about, in front, behind and around me. I snapped out of it and I was ready to shout on the top of my lungs at what I saw. She was right there. Sitting right next to me, looking as bored as I was. I couldn’t help myself. It was too good of an opportunity to give up. So I gathered my slimy balls and spoke to her. Never did I expect something like her to talk back to me but to my surprise we got along amazingly well. Someone that lived without expectations all their lives would be making a great and dearly mistake to turn that around. We talked about everything though-out the night. Her voice, her eyes, her hair, her smile, everything about her was up to perfection. I didn’t want to leave. This was the most beautiful night of my life and I loved every trickle of it. But nothing lasts forever. The night came to an end and so did our conversations. We said our goodbyes and parted our ways. I slowly made my way back home. The trail back consisted of one thing in my mind, Her. Days flew past and our bond grew thicker, thicker than the earth. It seemed so perfect. We saw each other daily, we ate together, laughed together, we did everything together. Little did I know that things can appear in a blink of an eye and it can also disappear in a blink of an eye.

I woke up to the bright shining light of the sun. Excited and expecting things now. I expected her to contact me, expected her to answer my calls and messages. My expectations were getting to me. I decided to lay low for a while and mostly sleep. A day passed. Two days passed. A couple more days passed. Nothing, no answers nor calls. No sense of existence. I didn’t know what happened. My heart sank every day since. It was sadness, a detached meaningless fog where I couldn’t feel anything about anything. A horrible loneliness shadowed every trace of my existence and an unrecognisable sludge formed that allowed no pleasure, no delight. My world started to tear itself apart day by day. I know it didn’t sound like much, but to me she was priceless. I felt happy. I felt my blood running through my veins. I felt every bit of my breath leaving my body and every beat of my heart all because of her. All the thoughts that ran tracks in my mind were a battle, every breath that left my body was a horrifically violent war and at the end of it all, it was me, losing. Not being able to stand any longer. Slowly floating away into the world of darkness, unable to see a single bit of hope. Slowly my life depleted. and to this day, a very small part of me leaves. It’s painful. The world sat back to the way it used to be, slow and sluggish. Everything around me rushed passed but there I was, stuck in the night of the past. With every move another wound to my heart, with every blink another tear drop to my eyes. Smothered in my darkness with heavy thoughts, clutching the tear stained pillow every morning thinking of her.  It was a never ending loop of pain. It was as if I was dying slowly, decaying from the inside. No matter how loudly I screamed, not a single sound escaped from me. No matter how many souls were around me, I’d still be lonely. No matter how much I tried, it still hurt me to smile. Stuck in the memory of the past. Stuck at a place of no escape. Slowly losing myself piece by piece. Torture. True torture. I raised my expectation. I raised them for one moment and my whole world came running down on me. Here I am, I feel nothing but I’m filled with sadness but I’m as empty as a glass without water. I am flying in the void but still standing on the earth. I’m thinking about her everyday unable to do anything about it. My sense of reality vanished. Dreams seem too real and reality seems too dreamlike. But I continue with that fake little smile on my face every day. It hurts more than anything. I am here right now, not knowing who I am or what I’ve ever done to deserve such pain. I truly wished it were different. I guess the universe created me as a slug, a slug not compatible with anyone else. Maybe I was made a slug, a slug to be alone…

Reviews

[Relic]

I'm sure its not only rude but against the law to review without reading poems or stories in their entirety. But I find it difficult in this case. I'm strange when it comes to extra-long paragraphs, they make me dizzy. With your permission, may I suggest cutting down those big paragraphs into smaller bite size chunks that are easier to swallow? I shall bother you no more with my weirdness. :p

[smexymomo]

Hahahah all good! Sorry that this isn't your piece of cake but I'll try and make sure to write something bite sized in the future

[Relic]

You have my thanks. ;)