Revelation before going to work (2-15-08)

Wouldn't it be great if we actually did die? Too bad we don't...

When we die, we get the dubious honor of watching someone else's life on a television screen. We do this over and over again, weeping at the fact that no matter what, we cannot stop them from making the same mistakes that we made time and time again in our own lives.

Given enough time of watching this awful series, we get the opportunity to buy a video game console and start a completely new life, controlling it from level one, but eventually that character dies too. They fill in your old spot on the chair and watch their life played out on a small monochrome television screen for a long, long time.

There's no escaping this fate. No eternal bliss, no eternal damnation. In death we find true objectivity by watching our lives over and over again to the point where we finally detach from the eternal moment and realize that our lives were and are, in fact, planned-out pages of a play book from the local Pop Warner football team.

That said, twenty-one is much too old to be alive. I don't want to watch a show that long, I wish the network executives hadn't bought the exclusive rights to air it.

I want to hire new screenwriters.

There it is. The only point to life is to make a good television show to watch after you die. If you've failed to do that, well by God at least you died correctly.

I've realized that I don't have a whole lot of time to make this show at all interesting, and part of me thinks that it won't be very interesting anyway mainly because all of this has already happened and right now I'm in the middle of some poor b*****d's television screen, typing everything that he already thought in his own life. Meanwhile he's laughing at the top of his lungs at the utter hilarity of this quandary. He knows the end, and unfortunately he can't tell me how the rest of the story goes up to the final breath when the credits roll, but he does know that right now I'm breaking the fourth wall and there isn't a damn thing he can do about it. In his own time, he too probably wrote something similar to this, or at least thought about it. Hell, he may have even talked to himself about it. I don't know, I personally wasn't there in the flesh, but I was definitely the topic of discussion at some board meeting for the network.

I'm begging and pleading with the person watching this show to please just unplug the television or at least change the channel. I've written to the network executives a few times to try and get new storyboards but nothing is getting done. You have the power. Please? Watching this much TV can't possibly be good for your eyes, in any case.

Of course you won't, though. You love a cliffhanger... hell, who doesn't?

I wish this weren't reality. I wish reality was that instead of watching a small television screen, it's actually listening to spoken word albums of all of the collected thoughts. No visuals, as the oral descriptions within the thoughts would be suitable enough for that purpose. Here would be the most graphic portrayal of human behavior, to hear word-for-word the thoughts of yourself in every moment of your life.

Or maybe the spoken word album with a slide show on top of it.

A goddamn television screen? A series?

No money, no contracts, just one white room with a chair and a 6" x 8" television that only picks up one channel and has only the most consistent programming with absolutely no sponsors. The only commercial breaks are for station identification. It's hard seeing your own name on a television screen that small.

It's not worth it. Any series lasting longer than twenty-one years better be damn good, otherwise the b*****d that made it will be hearing about it for a long time to come.

Reviews

[Sarah]

Thanks for sharing this very well thought out