So called stupidity

Love causes people to make the most drastic decisions

My feelings for you
Are now battered and bruised
As I look for some sort of salvation

I see you laughing at me
Is it too hard to believe...
In me and my one-sided love

I told you how I felt
I poured out my heart to you

Yet, you just looked at me and laughed
Then you just walked away

Left me standing knee deep in my own stupidity

I refuse to break down
I refuse to let you see me cry
I refuse to let him enjoy the pain he caused

I revisited the spot in the park
The spot where my world seemed to turn upside down
I revisited that spot
Hoping to find out where I went so wrong

He was so kind with a smile always shining brightly
He never had the cruel smile that he carried now

Was the him I knew a fake?
Was it just a figment of my imagination?

Was all the time we shared a lie?
Was our friendship all lies?

As I revisited that spot
I wondered...
About what made him such a horrible person

By the way he looked at me
I thought he felt the same

After you threw my feelings away...
Just like a piece of garbage
I knew that I was wrong...
He had not felt the same

The boy I thought I knew
Can't possibly be you

His kind and gentle eyes
Now replace with ones more cold and distant

Was the boy I spilled my heart out to
The same boy that I had came to love

For some reason I can't give up on him
He threw my feelings away
But I still want to love him
I wonder if I'll drown in my stupidity?

My heart doesn't want to give up
Though my heads telling me to pull out
To save me from the pain this one-sided love will bring

I know that you may never feel the same
But can I follow my heart?

Can I love you with everything I have?
Can I help returned you loving smile?
Can I help restore the boy that I fell in love with?

Then maybe, just maybe,
You'll come around to see
The feelings that you have for me

Some may call it stupidity
But I call it hope

The love that I have for him
It may never disappear

No matter how many times he hurts me
I'll never give up

I'll keep loving him from the sides
No matter how much it hurts
I love him and I'll never stop loving him

Even if I drown in my own so called...
Stupidity