Be Lonely, Be Your Best

This book challenges the populist idea that loneliness is a bad and sad thing. Loneliness is rather very facilitative mechanism of body-mind for wellness and personal excellence. It is innate call of

Be Lonely, Be Your Best

 

By Santosh Jha

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Copyright 2015 Santosh Jha

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License Notes 

Thank you for downloading this free ebook. Although this is a free book, it remains the copyrighted property of the author, and may not be reproduced, copied and distributed for commercial or non-commercial purposes. Thanks for your support. 

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Table of Contents

Pull yourself aside the mainstream of

pop culture and be your true self

We all have the first right to be lonely

to ruminate about life-living wellness

Populist collective consciousness denying

us this golden liberty to be lonely

Populist hypothesis of success, self-worth

and core realism of righteous identity

Loneliness is a positive realism for an endowed

consciousness, seeking further empowerment

What researches discover about loneliness

and how they put you in driver’s seat

Time to unlearn obstructive vestiges of

obsolete wired notion about loneliness

We’ve outlived utility of instinctive drives,

intellect must redesign their novel worth

Loneliness: call of instincts for self-actualization

of potentials within, to be our own Buddha

Reshape cognition of emotions of reward and rejection

to get nirvana from causality of gain and loss

Journey from unsettled, conflicted loneliness

to finality and fruition of joyous onlyness

Beautifully beneficial causality among

homeostasis, we, wellness & wisdom

Like love, loneliness is also potential

for attaining homeostatic wellness

Brainwaves realism, metacognitive bliss

and presupposition of loneliness

Neuroplasticity and optionlessess of goodness

and wellness as auto-mode virtue

Creating a personalized spiritual model

for lasting connect with happy milieus

Celebration of success of self-control

and happiness of loneliness

Leaving you with Einstein’s thoughts

Accept my gratitude

About the author

Other titles by Santosh Jha

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...For Finality Of Fruition

It is not that people await good times, the good times also await good people to come and hoist the potential seeded in the soil of future. Good words also wish for good readers, to be in reception of and be in linearity of the innocent intent, which ride on the shoulders of the words, for the finality of their fruition...

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... Beyond Populist And Culturally Suited Ideas

Confusion and conflict is something built-in mechanism of our ‘self’. Modern science says, ‘We don’t see things as they are; we see them as we are’. In other words, we usually do not see what is there to be seen but what we think must be there to be seen. Often, this instinctive subjective predisposition restricts objective realism. Be open, be liberal; do kindly accept holistic, assimilative and integrative perspectives to accept some idea or realism, which stands beyond populist and culturally suited ideas and idealisms…

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... Unlearning Existing Hypotheses

Often, there is a hypothesis, which is the foundation of all theories (standpoint/choice/priority) we accept as true and right. We all usually pick up some personal hypotheses, accept them to be true and then go on to construct a theory on the basis of these hypotheses. Often, these hypotheses are populist and culturally prevalent. Understand and accept each of the hypotheses we admit very consciously, as our life and living choices. This can be done by a difficult process of learning and unlearning going on simultaneously and at times in good competition. Unlearning is as important as learning. We all need to check and re-check all our existing hypotheses in the light of ever-evolving modern human wisdom…

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At The Very Outset

Dare To Prove Yourself Wrong…The Best Thing You Can Do For Yourself…. Why!

All wisdoms say �" humans are designed to live in state of oblivion, a state of instinctive semi consciousness nothingness, a state of blissful inertia, a status quoist comfort zone. To jolt oneself out of this, to eject out of this nothingness to full and absolute everythingness, one must challenge itself, something humanity has done since four million years. This is the doorway to common sense; evolution confirms it. It is better to challenge ourselves, as it feels bad when others point out mistakes in us. Moreover, others may not have the perseverance to keep telling us that we need to change. My humble, affectionate and compassionate attempt is to put in the ideas here for readers to internalize, so that elemental and seed-level changes could be understood and initiated within oneself. Internalizing needs you to drop your narcissism that you ‘know it right’. You may already; however, it is always ideal to stretch the horizon of your righteousness, as this evolution empowers your consciousness and leads to enhanced life-living wellness and personal excellence. We are definitely talking about this here. Dare to prove yourself wrong. If you do not, you are right on your own right. Then, so are others! There has to be a sense, which is common and it comes out of the assimilation of one’s subjective consciousness to objective higher consciousness. 

Do Let This Sink In, It Shall Stay…!

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Seeking Something Precious From You

I share a true story with you. My father had a doctor friend and he was very respected and valued. He would always prescribe at least seven drugs to his patients. So once my father asked him why he loaded so much pressure of cost on his poor patients. 

He replied, ‘I prescribe first set of three drugs for the cure or treatment of the disease and another set of four drugs to counter the side-effects of the first three drugs...’

He also added, as most of his patients were poor, they had deprived nourishment levels and a few supplements he had to prescribe so that the drugs could not disturb their already fragile body-system... 

I need to say it very humbly that I find myself in similar position to this doctor, when I write. Even when a doctor has not manufactured the drug, a good doctor always owns the onus of the side-effects or disturbance which it can cause to a person in need of a remedy or cure, especially if the end-user does not have the required nourishment levels. Similar are the destiny of words, which we use. Their utility and worth always is at the end of the receiver but still, we, the speaker have to own the onus of its effects on others. 

Being a good human is tough, as we have to be very responsible over what we deliver. For all good human and good-intentioned people, life cannot be easy. Therefore, we should do what this doctor did. When we deliver words, we need to design the whole package in such a way that there are a set of words, which communicates what we wish to convey. And then, in the same writing, we need to add another set of words, which backs up the first set of words, ensuring that it has little side-effect or destabilizing impact on an average reader. 

This artistry of fruition in writing is very tough task.

I don’t say that I have this, yet I very humbly request you to accept that while one writes, you may at times feel, he or she is writing uselessly so many words. The idea is, most words we use, are so full of diverse meanings and shades of interpretations. Moreover, every single person is in different shade of consciousness. This difference in consciousness engenders different meaning of the same word or set of words to different people. 

Therefore, I very humbly request you to magnanimously extend me your compassion and affection. As a writer, what I mean to say is not at my side. It is at your side and that is why, your compassionate heart for my words are the prerequisite for the fruition of my humble endeavour and enterprise.

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Thanks For Your Magnanimity, The First Chapter Begins...

 

Pull Yourself Aside The Mainstream Of

Pop Culture And Be Your True Self

PEOPLE THINK, THINGS are destined and everything in life happens, as and when they have to, with humans being mere role player. This sure is a near true reality for most average people as they are in drift, being just in reactionary consciousness, not aware and in any meaningful control of elements of life and living.

Destinies of course can be changed and some real people always do it, by knowing and accepting that whatever happens in life is a product of the Causality �" function of factors, which shape up a cause-effect chain of happenings and their cyclic spin offs. So, to change destiny, we need to change this causality.

There is a mechanism of all patterns of life-living factors, which prevail around us and involve us in some role play, which we often fail to recognize and be in control of. Therefore, the next important thing in shaping up your destiny is Cognition �" the way we see, feel and accept things in the space of ambient realism. This causality is very powerful and the cognition is often not very conducive for individual perception, as cognition is often backed by and driven by strong collective sense of realism. 

That is why; the ultimate thing in shaping up and changing destiny to one’s own suitability and utility is Consciousness �" this ephemeral sense of ‘I’, the self, this sense of ‘me’, in the midst of the cacophony of billions of ‘I’, who constantly vie for shaping destinies for their respective individualistic as well as collective suitability and utility.

If you feel, this description is too complex and this explanation of Consciousness, Causality and Cognition is some vague idealism, not amenable to practical utility, I appeal to you to never feel bothered. In the lines to come, we shall have very clear understanding of these terms and their practical benefits for real profitability.

Life is all about the 3Cs �" Consciousness, Cognition and Causality. Destinies, which we all accept as some external chain of happenings, are all about the causality of cognition of consciousness. This consciousness, this sense of a definitive and over-encompassing ‘I’, or the self, is usually very localized and in a drift or flux. This drifting and diminutive ‘I’ loses all control of life and living factors and elements and that is why it becomes an attachment to a pre-ordered destiny, especially the crowd destiny, led by Crowd Consciousness.

This ‘I’ has to be empowered, this consciousness has to be empowered for life-living wellness and personal excellence. Then, this evolved consciousness, this higher consciousness becomes the chief protagonist of the theatre of life and living, scripting its own play of life, its lyrics and choreograph the dance of destiny. This drift and flux has to be pruned, so that the ‘I’ is in full self-awareness and self-control, scripting its own individual destiny, distinct from the collective destiny of the crowd of people.

For this to be achieved, we have to come out of the drift of life and living, pull ourselves aside the forceful mainstream of pop culture of collective stupidities and be our true selves.

Therefore, The Primary Intelligence, In The Mêlée Of Millions, Is To Be Lonely... It is a precursor to quality leisure, which you need for yourself, to be friends with factors and elements of life, to be the master of the 3Cs �" Consciousness, Cognition and Causality, which then opens up the doors of all good things to you, for you to attain your best potentials...

This book is all about accepting loneliness as some positive and very beneficial happening for us, as it is truly empowering, leading us to overall life-living wellness and personal excellence. The book is also about how inappropriately most of us perceive and accept loneliness as. It is also about what exactly the appropriate and true realism of loneliness is for us and how best it can benefit us, especially in contemporary popular culture of clutter.

That is why, at the very start of the book, I have outlined the importance of consciousness as it is this higher consciousness, which makes the very fine difference in accepting a life-living situation as something very beneficial, as against the popular perception of it being a sad and bad thing. It is all about shift of cognition �" redefining, reshaping and redesigning our perception, which makes this change possible for us. 

This shift of cognition comes through empowerment of consciousness. It is so simple to understand. If not, then we are going to make it simple for you in this book, with the help of multiple perspectives.

So many people, over the ages and even in contemporary culture, have understood the difference between loneliness and solitude. Loneliness and solitude are just two faces of the same coin. When we feel sad and bad about being alone and lonely, it is a depressing feeling and it becomes identified as a debilitating realism called loneliness. 

However, when being alone and lonely makes us happy, feel good about being in exclusive audience with self, feel empowered being in retrospections about finer things of life, this becomes a very satisfying and rewarding emotion.

What exactly is the difference between loneliness and solitude? The former is bad and later is good. How? The difference is in our cognition. Two persons can be equally lonely but the emotions may vary if their cognition varies �" one accepting it as good for his or her wellness and another taking it as bad for his or her wellness. This difference in perception makes all the difference how we accept the realism of lonely emotions. 

The cognition plays the core and cardinal role in our wellness as it changes the causality �" the way we accept cause and effect of a particular situation. And, this happens because the two persons are in different consciousnesses. An empowered consciousness accepts even a seemingly tough situation as rewarding, whereas, an affected consciousness sees even a rewarding experience as a threatening situation.

In this book, we are talking about all the aspects of loneliness, with the help of the perspective of 3Cs, so that we could see and accept loneliness in its true and right cognition. At the end of these talks in this book, it shall be established with a holistic viewpoint �" involving both scientific knowledge and spiritual wisdom, that being alone is our best opportunity to become an empowered consciousness. 

This shall open all doors of life-living wellness and personal excellence. We shall finally find and enjoy the Happiness of Loneliness! Being lonely is about being our best selves!

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We All Have The First Right To Be Lonely

To Ruminate About Life-Living Wellness

There is a facility among cattle and many other hoofed mammals, which is so very beneficial for their survival and it is called �" Rumination. There is a word called Regurgitation, which means, taking the swallowed food back into the mouth. Then rumination happens, which means, the animals chews again the consumed food slowly and nicely, so that it could be digested well and its beneficial micronutrients could be extracted.

We all understand why evolution endowed this facility of rumination to the hoofed mammals. These animals are always the prime preys of the predator animals, who survive on their flesh. Therefore the hoofed animals are always in a hurry and devour their food in the open, as fast as possible, so that they could not fall prey to predators. However, the food they swallow without chewing cannot be digested and nutritional elements cannot be extracted that fast and that wholly. That is why evolution engendered this unique endowment of providing them with four stomachs and this facility of moving their food back from the stomach to the mouth again, which they chew in leisure and assured peace at a safe place.

For humans, there are loads of things happening all around us and in our drift and fast-paced life; we are just consuming everything, like those hoofed animals. We all need to be empowered to evolve a facility of mental or intellectual Regurgitation and Rumination. Like the hoofed mammals, we humans are also in a fast-paced drift �" focusing solely on consumption and possession of life attainments, not ever bothering to chew them well, before stacking them in our life-living time-space stomach. 

We all need to either slow down the process of swallowing, chewing them right then and there, which seems almost impossible in our contemporary cultures. Or, settle in a leisure and assured space of lonely being, where we could regurgitate the happenings of the day or the week, and then ruminate mentally and intellectually to chew them to a digestible and healthy state of things.

So many things keep happening around us, which impact us so badly and critically. Still, we seldom understand how and why things happened and what energized this chain of happenings. As we talked earlier, destiny is a causality, which may have many random elements, still it has good many factors, which we can bring in our self-control, thus aligning our destiny the way wish it to be. Being in happy self-awareness and self-control to understand the elements in our ambient milieus, to design a causality of our own liking and shape is empowerment. This empowerment has to be inculcated and nurtured.

This option to avail the facility of being lonely and having a qualitative leisure time for ourselves, gives us this opportunity to sit back, regurgitate the factsheet of happenings to the conscious mind and then ruminate over things in conscious correlation. Evolution has definitively provided us with this facility of conscious rumination in the form of the emotion of desire for solitude. It is our mind’s cultural confusion and conflict that we label this empowering facility as some wrong thing by labelling it as loneliness.

Humanity has already understood the futility of so many populist perceptions we have. The scientists have been warning us that we all have developed a wrong notion of this desirability to be happy all the time. They insist that nobody can be happy all the time and this desire itself is a psychological dysfunction. This obsession to be happy and thrilled all the time leads us to two dangerous situations. 

• First, we start to assign ourselves to multitasking, to maximize the joy and thrill in our lives. This is based on the populist notion that more action means more fun.

• Secondly, we go on a drive of extreme consumption, without examining the long-term value, worth and utility of the consumption. 

Science confirms; the brain cannot handle more than two tasks at a time. Naturally, we become more drifted and conflicted. Also, we tend to clutter our brains and mind consciousnesses more and more, each day we live.

That is why, we all need to stop, pull the car of our lives off the fast-lane expressway drive of populist contemporary culture of overdrive of consumption and mad multitasking. As we stop, move out, find quality leisure time for our self, we begin to understand the 3Cs of life and their importance in our wellness and excellence.

We have a brilliant example of how drift and flux of our lives in contemporary clutter culture is taking a huge toll on our wellness and personal excellence and how we can stop that by just being lonely and sparing time for us to ruminate over things intelligently. The current data over millions of divorce, all over the globe, especially in developed and highly liberalized cultures brings out two very critical points for rumination. The data says, two top reasons for growing cases of divorces are �" 

1. Even just before marriage, so many people are not sure, why exactly they are marrying. In many cases, even when the rings and vows are being exchanged, either one of the partners or both already have doubts about the real and true ‘utility and worth’ of the union taking place. They are confused as what exactly they want out of the marriage.

2. Many people actually are not sure what they want out of their lives. In that state of flux, they enter the institution of marriage and they are naturally not sure, what they wish out of the marriage.

It has to be accepted that the data may not be truthfully representing the state of mind consciousnesses of so many people involved in marriages, across different cultures and geographical areas, as generalizing such deep and intense emotions and feelings of so many people involved in divorce in different circumstances may not be that precise to be quantified in such singular bracket. 

Still, it is accepted by most analysts and psychologists that not only in marriages, in other key aspects of life too, like family relationships, friendships, jobs, careers, sex, passion, etc, people show this gradually rising tendency of wavering and general attitudinal volatility. This surely is the drift, which the contemporary culture of modernism is engendering. We do loads of things, as probably everyone is doing, or it is just pop thing to do. Yet, we are not definitively sure, why exactly we are doing what we are doing!

That is the crucial point of conscious rumination. As we talked earlier, destiny is a mix of random elements of happenings as well as conscious and self-controlled efforts of an individual. If this mix loses its judicious poise, if random and uncontrolled elements outbalance the mix, all causalities go out of our hands and we land ourselves in the deep ocean of flux and drift.

It is a growing realism that often, even in core life-living choices like �" marriage, choice of food, lifestyle priorities, sex, intimacy, careers, growing number of people are either very casual, while making choices or they are not categorically decisive. A survey shows, one third Americans accept that it is tougher to know what is the right food to eat than file their complex tax returns. This lack of exactness and definitiveness in so many important life-living choices adds to the drift and flux of consciousness. Naturally, this leads to affected cognition and causality about righteousness and appropriateness of life-living realism.

Psychologists say that this casual approach or indecisiveness should never be judged as some dysfunctional behaviour or psychosis. There are so many reasons for such a state of drift in life, which is growingly being accepted as normal. The troubles unfold here.

Some believe, this is an attitudinal issue as many people in liberal modern cultures never stop for a moment to ponder over the issue of appropriateness or righteousness of an action or behaviour. Usually, people are scared of being lonely and alone. Everyone loves to be part of the crowd �" inseparable part of the crowd behaviour of the collective consciousness, which feels happy and thrilled in doing whatever the celebrities do or what the markets and media portray as the whole world as doing. 

It is always easy knowledge to know what others are doing than knowing what exactly the right thing to do is!

May be, there is this revolting attitude towards all things in cultures, which have traditionally been labelled as appropriate. This contemporary celebrity culture also adds to this trend as the pop belief is �" being a celebrity means not doing things the way all do but doing those things and that way, which is definitively not appropriate and commonplace. So, a girl or a boy may never blink an eye, before dressing up in a way, not even thinking about appropriateness of the dress. This everything is okay and not worth thinking twice, has become a habit and part of subconscious mind. Rather, more inappropriate it sounds, more chic it becomes in celebrity driven pop culture.

There can be so many reasons. But the reality is that most of us are not even stopping a moment, not willing to be lonely enough to let our higher consciousness question and check the utility, worth and value of whatever we are doing. It is rather very clichéd and un-ceremonially boring to stop and ruminate. Going with the wind and being with the drift suits fine to average people in the contemporary pop culture.

May be, we are not very lucky like the hoofed mammals, who have this rumination facility biologically, still important it is that we use this idea of rumination for our wellness. We need to do it, at least mentally and ideationally. We have this intellectual faculty and facility to regurgitate and ruminate about the trends happening all around us and the precious data available to chew in leisure about what we can do to be a better person in future. Thanks to technology, we live in a world, where knowledge is where you sit, just a click away!

It is a humble wish, not only for every individual but for the societies across the world. Let us be wise, let us regurgitate and then ruminate. We need it. We all are better off when we stop and move off the mad mainstream of populist culture and accept the utility of being lonely. If there is something, which empowers us, we should not let it go unused. 

This facility is with all humans �" we all have the first right to be lonely, to be in a happy individualistic space of ‘I’ alone, and to be in the sanity of solitude, to understand the mechanism and process of 3Cs to empower our consciousnesses for life living wellness and personal excellence.

Yes, no doubt, most of us have this culturally wrong notion about the true meaning and sense of loneliness, which makes us run away from it and accept it as some sort of dysfunctional trait or state of things. 

We shall talk about the true meaning and utility of being lonely later.

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Populist Collective Consciousness Denying

Us This Golden Liberty To Be Lonely

Somehow, most may not like to accept it, yet, the fact remains that those in drift and those rooted well, can never have a singular worldview. A person on a moving train never has the right feel and acceptance of the true speed of the train, even though those stationed at a platform may see the train as well as the moving passenger differently.

Majority of people in fast moving lifestyle and cultural train of life, land themselves in a drift that takes away the realism and its true situational perspectives from them. They shall not usually accept some realism, which the rooted people keep saying. Rather, being in the drift is such a powerful expression of modern, liberal, consumerist culture and its associative worldview of instant-self-gratification and populist benchmarks of success and self-worth that very few actually think it as right choice to be anything but be in perpetual drift... being rooted surely stands out as a position of a duffer �" a certain loser...

Somehow, in populist cultural perceptions, which definitely is the collective or crowd consciousness of the contemporary cognition; being lonely and not being part or the usual drift of constant self-gratification and mad multitasking is considered a sure sign of failure. Nobody wants to be a loser and that is why, being lonely becomes a bad word. Consequently, loneliness has over the years become a word, which signifies a psychological syndrome of dysfunctional personality. We all live in a populist culture, where an illogical, unscientific and populist shade of psychology has come to stay as the core element of populist cognition, thereby affecting our consciousnesses in a wrong way.

It is this deep-seated populist collective consciousness of denying ourselves this golden right and liberty to be lonely, which makes most of us keep a constant date with the drift. This has brought about a bizarre situation for huge numbers of humanity. This drift makes people go crazy over consumption and instant self-gratification at all costs and this also becomes the populist benchmark of success and self-worth. More we consume, more we possess for sustained and unfettered consumption, more successful we are; in the eyes of society, markets and mass media.

This in turn makes clutter a fashionable realism in lives of more and more people. The more and more we have, more items are there in our limited spaces �" both in our home and our lives. Naturally, more clutter we have in our home and life. This clutter unconsciously fills in into our subconscious minds and starts to adversely affect the very process of our cognition and causality. The golden poise of the 3Cs in our lives goes for a toss. 

The success benchmark in contemporary populist culture is �" more cluttered your life-living situations, more successful and self-worthy you are. This wrong and dysfunctional causality, leads to this calamitous cognition that being lonely is disastrous and a bad sign. The golden shine of solitude becomes a scary scenario for most of us. Surely, a conflated cognition!

However, this is only one face of the bizarre life-living situation of the modern culture. A group of concerned socio-economic leadership is warning us that the more and more we consume, more we possess, yet we have into turned pleasure-starved societies. This liberal consumerist culture is based on the notion that consumption in all shapes and sizes actually enhances joys, thrills and happiness. The sane voices assert that this is the ideology and blind hypothesis of a culture and society in perpetual drift. The reality is; the developed high consuming cultures have become the graveyards of pleasure-starved, cluttered-consciousness, drifted people. We talk about the scientific logic of this hypothesis later.

So, we consume blindly, almost anything, which the markets, media and celebrities endorse to us as must have. And we all consume in loads as we say to ourselves �" everyone is doing the same and if I do not follow the same, I shall be left lonely, isolated and out of the mainstream. This nobody wants to do as nobody wishes to be labelled a loser. Majority of people being in drift and flux, is what suits markets, media and celebrities. We keep piling up the clutter in our lives and they love it. Often, in contemporary world, trade is tainted, business bewilders and markets manipulate!

Surely, being lonely is the first step towards personal empowerment and this empowerment means; we have this liberty and resolve to say a conscious and definitive no to the drift. Living in a true liberal world and having our golden rights to freedom means, we have all the choices for our wellness. But in reality, the freedom is limited to having limited consumerist choices. This is truly suffocating.

Yes, we have freedom to choose which television channel we can see among the many hundreds we have. We have the freedom to choose from hundreds of brands of soaps and cosmetics. We have the moneys and liberty to pick our best choices from the smorgasbord of most consumptions and self-gratifications. However, ask yourself, do you have any effective freedom to have any say in what economic or social policy you want to choose for your own wellness? Do you have any freedom to exercise over governance mechanism? 

We all know the answers. This meaningless freedom of choices is a state of flux and drift, we all live in. We happily accept a cognition which hardly exists there. We think we are free, which we are not. We think we are happy, which are not. Similarly, we think, we are lonely, which we are not. We think being alone and lonely is bad, which is not. This is a clear case of wrong causality affecting our cognition and in turn our conscious minds get fluxed and drifted.

Actually, the markets, media and celebrities never want to allow us to have true and real freedom of choices as it shall smother their profits. Indulgence of a cluttered consciousness suits them fine. The masses being in the deep ocean of optionlessness of consumption and self-gratification is what the clutter culture is all about. 

Being lonely suits you fine. Basking happily in the sunshine of golden solitude suits you fine and it is true freedom of your happy choice. But the collective culture never has this as happy option for it. That is why there is huge mass-media frenzy to popularize this theory that being lonely is a dysfunctional psychological syndrome. Psychology is being played out in our minds by the populist cultures and their presiding protagonists to keep the masses in constant drift �" away from the sanity of a lonely space of wellness and excellence.

Similarly, we have turned into a hyper-sexualised culture, yet simultaneously, we have become sex-pleasure-starved as more sex, more variety in sex, more sex partners and loads of other more in sex is not actually converting into more joys and happiness in sex and intimacy. We all think that we live in a happy liberal world where we are actually empowered by having freedom of choices in matter of sex. This is another wrong cognition and a bad causality of realism. The reality is; more sex means more clutter, more drift, more flux and more suffocation of optionlessness.

The markets and media want that people should keep in drift and they overly sexualize things. All expressions, including sexual expressions are being marketed to land into more profits for producers and marketers. That is why, all sorts of transgressions are being turned into profitable propositions and that is why, media, markets and celebrities ensure that all transgressions of consumption, including sexual transgressions become norms.

Gradually, many saner voices all over different societies have begun to say that we have become a dysfunctional society �" both sexually as well as in general, because, majority of people, young or not so young, have very limited and restrictive views of sexuality and we all need to understand the complexities of the mechanism of joys and happiness of humanity. Everywhere, the rationalists and saner elements of humanity are questioning this populist cognition about true and real happiness and satisfaction of life-living. The troubles need to be seen and accepted from the viewpoint of the 3Cs �" consciousness, cognition and causality.

No doubt, this is a philosophy and worldview of those who see the troubles of the drift of humanity and are rooted, far away from the clutter and madness of liberal, consumerist and thrill culture. However, what we are talking about here is the express need to accept it as the right worldview for wellness of larger humanity. This we shall do in coming chapters with the holistic approach, involving scientific logic as well as spiritual wisdom.

This is however, only the second aspect of the bizarre life-living realism. The third and most crucial aspect is the hypocrisy that is being pumped into the culture, as a by-product of the drift. Eight year old girl is being sexualized by media and markets, in their zeal to earn more profits by selling thongs and fishnet stockings to them. The girls want it as they do not wish to be called a loser in the drift-culture. 

They are only kids but their mothers also buy them as they too do not want them and their girls to fall behind in the race of modernism and be labelled as losers. Success is very demanding. Everybody wants to be in the crowded space of successful icons. Not being part of the crowd gives this undesirable sense of being left out and lonely!

This obsessive desire to be with pop cultural benchmarks, even if it is calamitous, is reflected in the way teenage girls are starving themselves to look thin. Surveys reveal that majority of teenage girls want to thin down, even when they are fine and healthy, just because they accept that most celebrities are thin and this is what they have to be at any cost. 

The survey also reveals this black fact that majority of these girls are told by none other but their own mothers to unhealthily thin down. Doctors have been educating people about the right body weight and troubles of unhealthy starving to be thin. Yet majority of people are not listening to the saner voices as for them, what matters most is celebrity culture and obsessive adherence to benchmarks of celebrity successes.

Everyone knows and can see it with the bare eyes that this dysfunctional mis-adventurism of sexuality and consumption is having a very debilitating impact on kids and teens. So, the hypocrisy creeps in. The markets pushes in the whole population, including the kids into all sorts of transgressions, including sexuality and then, the media and governments push in the stupidity of ‘Protect The Kids’ drama by preaching ‘abstinence’ in schools.

The hypocrisy is not only in schools but spread in entire culture. This is a world, where nothing is sacred, nothing is banal, nothing is undoable and almost nothing is as bad as to be not accepted as norm. Celebrity culture has diluted most healthy norms of appropriates. This is a scenario, where the self, the ‘I’ is perpetually challenged to stretch its domain and dimension to unknown or untouched heights. 

This ‘I’ is not allowed to settle, never left alone and lonely, to have a dialogue with higher consciousness. Rather, it is clear that being alone and lonely is so scary for most as they are not comfortable with their own consciousness. The drift takes over the self and ‘I’ stands conflicted and split.

We all need to have a settled and poised ‘I’ and a sense of self. This drift is calamitous. We need to live in a true liberal socio-cultural milieu, where we have real choices and true freedom to be, not what we want, but what is best for our wellness and personal excellence. 

It is the core causality of all dysfunctional cognitions, which we begin to patronize. This leads us to all sorts of life-living disorders as well as lifestyle diseases. We shall talk about this crucial issue of life-living poise and its correlation with the desirability of being lonely later, when we talk about homeostasis in detail.

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Populist Hypothesis Of Success, Self-Worth

And Core Realism Of Righteous Identity

Somehow, the populist cultures and pep psychology of modernist life-living has ingrained in the mind of average people that being lonely is a huge burden and you have to jerk it off and join the mainstream of social drift to be happy, to live life in full. It is not easy to come out of this populist mindset to know and accept that in reality, you are the happiest when you are perfectly lonely deep within and in perfect poise with your higher consciousness. 

All over the globe, millions of people are battling with loneliness and find it a burden on their wellness. It surely is a worldview and life-living hypothesis very much against the contemporary populist cultural benchmark of success to accept that being happy and joyous is not truly about external attainments of name, fame and moneys; even though they matter a lot. It is about a consciousness position, where one is content, confident and consistently in affectionate reception of one’s treasures within. This in turn extends the latitude to manage our external attainments well.

The difference is so subtle and intangible. This idea of true life attainments and true success is something only a rooted person can understand and accept. The qualitative difference between the thrills of material consumption and satisfaction of poised consciousness cannot be known but can only be realized. This hypothesis is surely antagonistic to the worldview of people and cultures in drift. The contemporary populist culture and celebrity-driven consciousness of even an average person makes him or her believe that a person’s true identity is in his or her material attainments and external successes. The markets, the mass media, the celebrity culture as well as the pep psychology keeps enforcing this idea about success identity on average people. Once people accept this populist perspective about one’s true self, one’s identity; they become part of the drift. This then lands them in perpetual fear of being alone and lonely. There is this frenzied and forced perception about being lonely as a calamitous thing, which is very untrue.

Often, when an average person, especially the young people, is in celebrity mode, he or she is onto an overdrive of action and reaction. There is so much of attainment to achieve and so much attainment to defend. All the time, there is this huge burden of being successful at all costs. In our subconscious minds, this self-identity is working overtime for external attainments of money, name, fame and utilities as mass media, celebrity culture and psychological benchmarks egg them to accept that a person has to be perpetually happy and thrilled in order to be labelled successful. Everyone wants to be a celebrity and perpetually happy!

Scientists warn us that this very hypothesis is a killer and a non-starter. Nobody can be happy all the time. This very hypothesis rather conflicts the whole personality. The subconscious self works overtime and in overdrive to attain the identity of a celebrity, whereas the conscious mind has equally potent longing for peace and leisure. This is our mechanism; it is the way our mind works. This conflict creates split consciousness. We see only the shiny visible side of the celebrities, which they and the mass media flaunt. However, we do not see and accept the dark or grey shades of their lives, which every celebrity shall definitely have, as they are humans too. They look always shiny and always happy but it is not the whole template. We wrongly accept that unreal picture as real and create havoc with our lives.

That is why, whenever someone is alone, he or she feels uneasy and unsettled. How could one enjoy peace and leisure of loneliness, when inside, the grind is on, working intangibly for the fear of the empire one is presiding over. The grind of action-reaction never leaves one alone and that is why, even when one should have been happy and at peace with his or her leisure, he or she feels unsettled and nervous. It is not very difficult to understand and accept as why people all over the world fear loneliness.

If I wish to be in happy state of life, I surely have to make a deal with my higher consciousness. I just need to have a good, innocent and confident talk with my own conscious self. I need to tell myself in definitive terms that look I am lonely but very happy. I am successful as I am in singular consciousness of reception of self; very much happy with my attainments deep within me, not what I might have attained outside in the social sphere. I know, my real empire of attainments and successes is my deep consciousness and my real diamonds and dollars are my innocence, my simplicity and honesty, my affectionate and compassionate self. My true possessions are all intangibles of my own creation, engendered by my higher consciousness. This surely I have to keep growing and evolving but whatever I have within me, it is going to remain there for good. I do not have to be in overdrive of action-reaction to defend it and sustain it. 

Once we do it, we start enjoying our precious golden loneliness. It is a huge artistry to learn to be in absolute reception of tangible and intangible elements around us. When we are lonely; in this state of higher consciousness, everything begins to talk to us. This facilitates the artistry of being in better control of our destiny, as we are better aware of all elements in our ambient milieus. The mind consciousness is not only acting or reacting to milieus and elements around us but simply imbibes them. We sit on top of all layers of the collectivity and actually preside over them as a king or queen, for hours all alone and truly enjoy our peace and leisure.

We need to cultivate this very interesting idea. When we do something all alone, we usually feel bored and accept it as drudgery. However, if you have a company, especially of a loved one, the same work becomes a festival and joy. Why not consider the realism that one is never alone as he or she always has and must have this intangible company of affection and compassion for the people and of the people he or she is doing something, even alone. 

True, one should never be lonely in his or her hearts and minds. We all need to be joined by the joys and blessings of the people, whom we love, wish well of and value. There is little need for all these people to be physically with you. It may even be a burden. Scientists also emphasize that emotional loneliness is dangerous and it is not about not being with people. It is about not having affection, compassion and mutuality feelings in hearts. This in turn clearly means, we ourselves create the ghost of loneliness as we fail to own the real attainments in life and then blame it on others for our troubled feelings of loneliness. This also amply suggests, nobody else can help us clear away the clouds of loneliness, as it has little to do with others but self.

There is this lovely and very satisfying idea of emotional and ideational company, which one always can have, even while physically alone. We just have to accept and understand that one can never be lonely when the heart and mind is populated with affection and compassion for everyone. People become lonely primarily because they keep beautiful emotions of mind away, while seeking physical company with an agitated and sad heart.

So many people have experienced this magic within. If you love yourself enough, there is this filled up space within and you actually wish to be alone and lonely to enjoy exclusive audience with yourself. This is the difference between what we accept as loneliness and solitude. When we are happy with our selves, when we love ourselves well, when we have sense of attainment and self-worth within, when we accept that listening to our own emotions is great music, we are in happy state of solitude. If not, the same situation becomes a dreadful emotion of loneliness. It is all about being comfortable and friends with our own selves.

Growing number of people all over the world, especially in fast-paced developed societies have started to accept this simple hypothesis that sanity and loneliness go together. This suggests, if we have to hit sanity, we have to value the utility of loneliness. Moreover, if we are lonely, we are very much in a facilitative space to find sanity.

This recent acceptance of the term mindfulness by so many people itself is the indicator that many people are growingly accepting the futility of this drifted and fluxed life in contemporary clutter culture. It is also an acceptance of the utility of loneliness as conscious option, rather than a forced situation. This mindfulness is a very critical word. In the next chapter, we shall talk in detail about what mindfulness the world has suddenly become fascinated with. It is important to be mindful of ‘I’ first; rest is easy.

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Loneliness Is A Positive Realism For An Endowed

Consciousness, Seeking Further Empowerment

An average person is often floating in a soup of sensation, emotion, impulse, desire, imagination, thought and intuition. We can say, there is a mechanism within everyone, which itself puts us in a state of drift and flux. There is a reason to it. We need to understand the mechanism.

There are seven conscious and unconscious elements of personality. All seven elements are within an individual and operate simultaneously. The life journey is shifting gears in these consciousnesses. Most of us therefore are in a state of ‘flux’ �" conflicted and confused. This is our mechanism. The simple reality is �" more intelligent we become �" that is, more information our mind processes, more elements of chaos, conflict and confusion get embedded in our conscious and subconscious minds. This has got to do with the way our consciousness is designed and works.

Then, there are eight intangible affecters: Sensation, emotion, impulse/desire, imagination, thought, intuition, will and the central point I or personal self. An individual is often split and conflicted between these. Often, we put in more or undue weight and importance to one aspect; often justifying it, which is psychosis. The requirement however is synthesis of all these psychological functions by the Self. The higher consciousness needs to strike harmony and balance. This poise is the destination. 

This poise is very subjective and individualistic. Moreover, this poise already has a tough task to handle the pulls and pushes of seven elements of personality and eight intangible affecters, which are internal to our being. Therefore, this poise must never be subjected to more and greater drift and challenges from external milieus. It needs a state of self, which has to be amenable for inbound energies of deep concentration and introspection. This state of loneliness �" this position of mindfulness of the mechanism of our consciousness, is a highly facilitative state, which we need to accept. Loneliness is a positive realism for an endowed self, seeking further empowerment. This initiates with mindfulness, which has loneliness as its primary prerequisite. The populist cultural meaning of loneliness as a sad and bad realism must be unlearned.

Few people recognize that their own personhood is a mystery.  Fewer still care enough about the mystery to understand it. The Pop-Belief is �" Life is more about living it than it is about understanding it. However, shouldn’t we ask ourselves, ‘Who are we?’ This mindfulness is primary need for our overall wellness. The answer needs knowing and it needs allowance to some knowledge, other than what we hold dear to our heart. That is why being lonely is option-less �" a definitive facilitative idealism for wellness and personal excellence.

The trouble is; the process of understanding one’s ‘self’ is pitted against one’s own beliefs about one’s ‘self’. It is not an easy task to determine which of these beliefs are true and which are mere ideas. Scientists say, ‘We are in the error of believing that our Body and We are the same things. We are not aware that each of us is a virtual agent, a self, that speaks for his or her organism’.

There are two subjects within you. One is the Generic Subject, which is your innate body mechanism. It accepts only tangible things and is mostly reactive and self-initiated. The other subject is Specific Subject, which leads a mindful and thoughtful action. The self, the you is a functional relationship between the two subjects and is a virtual agent. You are a bridge between the two ends of the two subjects. Mindfulness makes you say hello to your true consciousness.

The ‘I’, which exists and performs in each layer of consciousness is not singular, rather it is the summation of different Me of different layers of consciousnesses. So, there are different I when you are rising in the morning, playing with your kids, praying in the church, dealing finance with your colleagues, watching a movie in the evening, dizzy after boozing and finally in bed with your spouse.

Different life situations, requiring diverse sets of ‘action-thought-behaviour’ patterns, as commensurate with ambient milieus and cultural appropriates, engender different layers of consciousnesses. In all these layers, the I may be different but there is one I, in higher consciousness, which is always sort of commanding all the former Is.

This Master I is not singular and independent, rather a summation of the all other I. The I in the higher consciousness is not something aloof from an individual. The higher self is not a rejection of individual’s baser selves or instincts. This Master I is a mind positioning within, which accepts conflicts of the different personality aspects and functions �" the different I.

It is a super state of mind awareness, which recognizes all aspects; be it in any state of unconscious or subconscious. It attempts to bring them to the layer of higher consciousness for harmonizing them into a fruitful whole. This higher consciousness must be in harmonious relationship and overall poise with all aspects and functions of an individual personality, like a true master and always be in control. This is a huge and tough process and surely needs this facilitative state of self, called loneliness, as it initiates the process of mindfulness.

Spiritualism gives us a metaphor of Master I being the driver of a chariot with six horses, reigning in all of them to a singular path of appropriate. The core issue is to understand the higher consciousness in detail, as, it is this I, which has the definitive role of being the master of an individual.

This Master I is the media for exploration of an expanded experience of human identity, capacity and potential. This I leads self to a journey into transpersonal dimensions. These dimensions encompass the higher levels of the energy spectrum: realms of higher consciousness that transcend the everyday awareness of the personality.

Many psychic phenomena are strictly emotional or delusional, tinged with fears, personal prejudices and wishful thinking. These are moments when one of your I may take off on obsessive flights. This is the test of your Master I navigation controls. The Master I must always be evolving and as it evolves, the dimensions of consciousnesses get enlarged and the Master I is empowered more.

The above descriptions about consciousness are aimed at bringing about the importance of understanding consciousness and its mechanism in details. Once we understand and accept the intricate mechanism of consciousness and how it is primarily instrumental in our wellness and excellence, we shall happily accept that all cognitions and causalities are dependent on consciousness and this consciousness instinctively being in a state of drift and flux, has to be assigned qualitative time and space for a very mindful and retrospective thought process. That is why loneliness becomes a cardinal need for all people, especially those, who are used to of fast paced life and habit of multitasking.

The mechanism of our own mind consciousness is designed in such a way that it excels in reacting to things in its ambient milieus. We are essentially a reactive genius. However, we are no more purely instinctive beings. We live in societies with cultures, which define our choices. The consciousness is bound to be wavering between what is our nature and what comes to us as nurture, in the form of milieus. 

In the milieu we live, we are always faced with newer questions as well as answers. Our wellness and excellence depends on how well we manage the incessant process of learning and unlearning. The unlearning is far more important than learning in the process of our evolution to wellness and excellence. Learning surely is possible even in fast-paced life full of drift and flux, in a state of sub-consciousness. However, unlearning is a tough task, needing a qualitative leisure time and space, a very conscious mindfulness, which the happy situation of loneliness facilitates. We have this ideal state for unlearning when we land in loneliness. That is why the first intelligence for us in this clutter culture is that we must unlearn the misgivings associated with loneliness.

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What Researches Discover About Loneliness

And How They Put You In Driver’s Seat

This realism of loneliness, as we see its different manifestations and dimensions in contemporary societies, especially in complex and developed cultures, must be examined from two possible ways. First of course is the populist perception, which often is not what an objective perspective can accept. This is largely because this populist perception about loneliness is a creation of people affected by the troubles of loneliness themselves. That is why it has larger elements of subjective perceptions, coloured by pep psychology and mass media.

It has to be accepted that it is a populist practice to add more fiction into facts. Often, most fictions about things start with facts but populism ensures that subjective narratives and personal lore also become part and parcel of the objective reality. Populist perception about loneliness being a collective realism of the experiences of lonely people itself, loads of extrapolated wisdom and experiences easily become acceptable as fact. Human brain is genius of extrapolations.

However, scientific, objective and logically singular fact about loneliness is far from what populist realism stands as. It is very important for all people to understand and accept this singular objective factsheet about loneliness. Yes, it has to be admitted that it is not going to be easy for those people suffering from loneliness to accept this, as it somehow puts the larger onus on them. Still, accepting helps in unlearning the clichéd and stereotypes about loneliness, which is predominant in popular perception of most.

Most scientists define loneliness subjectively. That is, they believe, if you consider yourself lonely, you are. They insist that loneliness must be seen as an internal, subjective experience, not an external, objective condition. It is an objective realism that people grow lonely because of the gloomy stories they perceive and tell themselves.

This realism about loneliness has to be accepted. It is of primary importance, as the diagnosis of real meaning, nature and actualism of the realism of loneliness, in all its manifestations and multidimensionality, shall help us in accepting that loneliness is largely about subjective perceptions and that is why, an individual is very well endowed to not only come out of this perceived loneliness troubles, rather also begin to value, treasure and enjoy it. Moreover, we shall then begin to use this facility of loneliness as a tool of empowerment for life-living wellness and personal excellence. So, about loneliness, we all need to have two different process done simultaneously �" unlearning and then learning.

Enough researches have established that lonely people have just as much social capital, defined by physical attractiveness, height, weight, socioeconomic status, and academic achievement, etc., as their non-lonely peers. What this hints at? 

It is the same, which the above fact asserts. That is, perception as well as realism about loneliness is very subjective, very individualistic and that is why loneliness can be successfully handled by the affected individual itself. Researchers also maintain that the less educated are lonelier than the better educated. This also clearly points to the same fact about loneliness being a very subjective realism and a person, who has better mental and consciousness abilities, can truly avoid loneliness trap and can be endowed enough to come out of it successfully. This shall be a truly winning, enjoyable and self-worthy experience for all.

Researches establish the fact that lonely people are not necessarily more isolated. Also, it needs to be known and accepted that scientists say, ‘what we most crave is the company of other people, but it can be that very company that sets us off to what we perceive as loneliness and then begin to belief in its onset’. Let us spare and invest good amount of positivity, leisure, acceptance and innocent reception about some core realism about loneliness.

Researchers find that loneliness often has loads to do with our intimacy needs and how we handle it. Also, researches confirm that a key part of feeling lonely is feeling rejected, and that, it turns out, is the most damaging part. It is for sure that the feeling of rejection is somehow a corollary of the core issue of intimacy, which is at the centre of the emotions of loneliness. This series of related emotions and realism have to be very carefully understood and accepted.

Researchers say, ‘What is different about lonely people from other non-lonely ones is how they interpret their social interactions with friends and acquaintances. Loneliness is interpreted by scientists as the ‘perceived’ gap and ‘inconsistency’ between what someone desires in relationships, especially intimate relationships and what one actually has or finds in these relationships. Studies say that lonely people tend to feel put upon and misunderstood. The researchers say, ‘lonely people are more likely to attribute problems in social relationships not to themselves but to others, and often see themselves as victims who are already giving as much as they can to their relationships, but get back poor things.’ 

This must be viewed with a very affectionate and compassionate heart and mind. Does this all seem not very serious thing but just a small gap between what is perceived and what turns out to be? Does it seem that the trouble is not actually something physical or actual but notional and subjectively perceivable? If it is, doesn’t this signify a very usual thing between people. Globally, experts accept that despite technologies, humanity has grown this trouble of gap between people, be it communication or relationship goodies.

This surely seems the reality. Researchers and scientists say that worst thing for lonely people is that ‘loneliness itself can further distort their thinking, making them misread other people’s good intentions, which in turn causes them to withdraw to protect themselves from further rejection. This in turn causes other people to keep them at arm’s length’. Scientists warn, ‘loneliness can create its own self-defeating behaviour’.

Now, let us put in picture what we said very initially in this book. We talked about the idea of 3Cs and their utility in understanding core realism of our life-living experiences. We need to apply this 3Cs principle for better diagnosis of the populist perception about loneliness being a huge trouble. The simple realism, it seems is, loneliness is a condition of our own drifted or fluxed consciousness, giving us misplaced cognitions, thus and in turn making us accept a wrong and unrealistic causality.

What the scientists say about perceptions of lonely people is a two way mechanism. Loneliness distorts what we perceive and believe. However, it is also the vice-versa. Our distorted worldview and perspectives leads us silently to the deep woods of loneliness. Scientists say, ‘you are in your perspectives and your perspectives are in you’. What this means? This suggests the simple fact about the 3Cs. If we have an affected consciousness, which happens because of our over-indulgence in drift and flux life-living choices and clutter culture, we shall have a distorted or disturbed cognition. This means, a consciousness, which misses the poise and balance of perspectives and worldviews, also has distorted cognition �" means, he or she sees and accepts something, which is either not a fact but fictitious, or accepts things, which have little facts but more fictions.

The straightforward fact is �" there are so many cognitive troubles in our popular cultures, which are embedded in the affected consciousness, many of us tend to evolve, because of the flux, drift and complexities of modern life and living. We have already discussed how our conscious minds and subconscious minds become home to loads of chaos, conflicts and confusion in this contemporary populist culture and then lose their poise. This affected consciousness then affects poorly our faculty of poised cognition. This in turn makes us see and accept twisted and mistaken causalities. 

Loneliness, which is actually a potent and potentially positive faculty of a poised consciousness, becomes a victim of wrong cognition and causality. As we said, drifted and fluxed life-living and clutter culture pushes us to the deep woods of loneliness. This forest is a nice place, a truly empowering milieu if we see it that way. However, most people are scared of woods. Therefore, they fail to enjoy the very soothing and serene environs of the woods. It is all because of affected and distorted perspective. We are in our perspectives and our perspectives are in us.

Scientists however very categorically say that being lonely is ‘not such a passive situation that you can say, you just cannot help’. You can, with a change in your perspectives, through a process of unlearning and learning, towards the acceptance of this true and actual realism, within and outside you. The learning, which we all need to have, is about the 3Cs. We need to learn scientific and singularly objective facts about consciousness, cognition and causality. This is what getting popular in many parts of the world. People are accepting that clutter cultures we are in are taking us away from our own realism. People are accepting that mindfulness is the call of the hour. Loneliness is gradually being appreciated.

What we have to unlearn is that populist cultural clichéd, which has entered our instinctive behaviour and actions. We have to unlearn inappropriate benchmarks of success, self-worth, utility and happiness, which the contemporary clutter culture of markets, media and celebrities has heaped on us. We have to unlearn that we cannot do. We sure can! We shall discuss about how to handle loneliness well in later chapter.

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Time To Unlearn Obstructive Vestiges Of

Obsolete Wired Notion About Loneliness

We have in our popular cultures, a rather stupid situation. Most of us now know and believe in evolutionary theory of human existence on Earth. We always talk about how things are hard-wired and how, things are there in our brains, about which we cannot help much. It is rather fashionable and also considered an intellectual exercise to say that this is so visceral and that is not. Still, many of us do not accept the fact that modern life-living realism has almost stopped the very natural process of evolution and in modern times, what we see at best is the vestiges of the crumbled empire of evolution.

Therefore, the contemporary human civilization and cultures have one huge task to talk about and take in our hands. That is, we now have to ascertain very objectively as what evolutionary traits, we had and which were once of great or some good use and utility, now needs to be unlearnt and pruned in a smart way. We have ourselves stopped the natural stream of evolution way back and therefore, we surely carry a huge burden of decrepit and degenerated traits of that outdated and even dead evolution.

We need to understand this. Scientists believe that loneliness is also a wired response of body-mind mechanism, which seems like a trait, we developed during long years of evolution. Scientific studies have accepted that in some species, the male may live in isolation of the group, but most species live in large groups as it suits their survival and living needs. Human species have larger needs to live in tribal groups as human offspring have such long period of body-mind maturity that it needs the nurturance of large number of families, apart from its immediate one. Humans have the largest Social Animal Needs (SAN).

That is why, we all are wired to feel safe, sane and happy in social environments, where high levels of nurturance and interdependence is a very positive element. Scientists define loneliness as a body-mind response, indicating us to move into the collectivity, the larger family, friends, peer groups and society in general. We all are somehow, wired to feel lonely and as evolution ensures; emotion of loneliness is as good a friend for we all as is the core emotion of humanity called fear. Scientists term fear as humanity’s first intelligence. If we didn’t have emotion of fear, we would have poor survival chances.

Similarly, loneliness is also an intelligence, which is wired in our brains. We all are born with this intelligence of fear as well as loneliness. However, as since long, we have changed the nature and its raw forms in such lateral and vertical ways that we do not need to accept this raw emotion of fear, as evolution has bestowed on us. We do not fear things, the way our ancestors needed to, thousands of years back. We now have the technology for assured safety and security. We fly jets and walk the space on a space shuttle. We have simply gone much beyond fear, as our first intelligence could decide our horizon. 

However, we still have this emotion of fear and it still helps us in some good way. But, we have learnt to use this energy of fear and this valuable emotion of fear for our larger wellness and excellence. But, the fact remains that till date, even when we have greatly overcome the raw elements of fear in our daily life-living experiences, there are hundreds of phobias humanity still grapples with. Millions of people all over the globe are badly affected by phobias. And, the fact remains that modern living adds loads of more phobias, which we were not even aware of a few hundred years back.

Similar is the situation with this wired intelligence of loneliness. We live in a world, which seldom allows us this precious liberty of being alone. We live in such crowded cities. Everywhere, there are many times more people than necessary. We are far more connected in so many ways. Distance and time have been bridged successfully. However, as the researchers say, people tend to be lonelier even in crowded world and the same person, who happens to be the centre of all intimacies and wellness becomes the trigger of loneliness.

The difference, which we all need to understand, is �" evolution wanted us to live in communities and live a life of interdependence with each other not because being in the group or tribe had any goodness. The virtue of community living was in the nurturance and mutuality, which human kids needed for their better survival. We still live in communities; we still are part of societies, which are much larger than societies, when evolution wired this emotion of loneliness in us. 

However, contemporary societies are no more the same nurturing and empathetic group, which it used to be. Rather, we have a modern society, which is calamitously competitive, where this race of one-up-manship and exclusivity has withered all the nurturance and mutuality sentiments. We live in modern cultures, where individualistic pursuits, attainments, possessions and consumptions have unleashed such competitive feelings, which make us get more pain than pleasure, more hurts than happiness when we are in collective spaces.

This celebrity culture has shattered the nurturance element of societies. In a society, where 95 percent resources are with only 5 percent people, how can average people be in happy nurturance and mutuality feelings? This five percent of celebrities have created a societal space for the rest of 95 percent, which is calamitously competitive for very survival. In such a society, how can one get the wellness emotions, which is required for being nurtured!

That is why in contemporary clutter culture, we are surely not requiring social and cultural connects for the type of nurturance and mutuality, for which evolution designed the emotion of loneliness in all of us. This emotion is therefore not as useful, rather a huge burden and we have to unlearn that. Loneliness and its primeval utility to drive us into societal and cultural connect is an obsolete mental wiring. It is the vestiges of the dead evolution. 

We need to redesign and reshape this emotion as per our contemporary needs, which is just the opposite of what old evolution wanted. We are in modern age, the victims of collectivity. We need more nurturance and mutuality but the societal space is not giving these to us. Rather, it is taking them away from us. Therefore, we have to reverse things. We have to accept that we are somehow better off, when we are lonely and in exclusive audience with ourselves. Quality leisure time for ourselves, this golden solitude for us is now far more nurturing thing for us. This new realism tells us to accept the fact that we as individual are the prime source of our own nurturance and empathies. If we have them, we are better placed to survive in the collective space, which is devoid of the same.

It is, therefore, very evident that like fear, loneliness is also our great asset, a facility of crucial intelligence, yet, they stand as largest crippling phenomena in contemporary cultures. Looks like; we are at a stage of civilization, where we have grossly mismanaged our instincts and turned them into our predators, which were once placed as our key survival intelligence. This somehow, points to the fact that in some way or the other, loneliness is essentially an individual mismanagement of body-mind poise, which is aggravated by a clutter culture, to which contemporary life-living is being subjected. That is probably why scientists say, races and species, which become intelligent, become extinct as often, intelligence is suicidal. We are not elaborating this hypothesis here but it is for all of us to understand.

We have a big task at hand. We understand and accept that evolution is no more the guiding principle of our action and behaviour. We are all well past evolutionary essentials and still carrying many obsolete and even obstructive traits and behaviour patterns of old world. We all need to unlearn such obstructive vestiges and remnants of past. 

Loneliness was genetically wired to our consciousness and it had its utility and worth in the past. Loneliness in the past served us a warning signal, as part of the evolutionary simple plan of fight or flight. Our survival depended on collective living in the past but things have changed. We live in a different world with different set of challenges, in which survival has different meaning and survival is no more the core question. The core question is wellness and sanity.

The core question of survival has taken different shades and it is now expressed in terms of wellness and poise of purpose. That is why we too have to unlearn many of our obsolete perspectives. We are still in our obsolete perspectives and that is why these crippling perspectives are in us. We need a new consciousness, which has a new cognition strategy that puts in right and contemporary causality for our larger wellness and personal excellence.

At the very outset, we have to unlearn that loneliness is a dysfunction. We need to unlearn the obsolete perspective that loneliness is a flight sign of mind, urging us to fall back to the crowd of collectivity. We have to accept that loneliness is not the correct wired response of the old brain in contemporary times. This cognition and causality of archaic world has to be unlearned. 

The new learning is that loneliness is a conscious choice for self empowerment, not a wired optionlessness. Loneliness is a positive state of mind consciousness, which is required very urgently in contemporary clutter and claustrophobic cultures, to focus on empowered individualistic energies, for overall life-living wellness and personal excellence.

In contemporary world, liberalism and consumerism has created a very powerful individual, who is very competitive and demanding, but he or she has landed in a drift and flux. The raw and core question of survival has been replaced by this brutal competitiveness to be successful, be a celebrity, be happy always, be thrilled all the time and be in the drowning ocean of non-stop instant self-gratification in all times. This cultural and populist benchmark of being successful has now become the new primary drive of survival. This makes people live a life of drift and flux.

This dualism is killing people, mentally and intellectually. There is this mad cultural brouhaha about empowered and endowed individualism and this on the other hand makes individuals a slave of collective chaos, conflict and confusion. We as individuals are no more the victim of our own making. We are victims of the making of a clutter culture, where inappropriate benchmarks of successes, self-worth, utility and righteousness are splitting the individual personality. 

We live in times, where cultures and societies are the prime source of disconnect and alienation. It is time for individuals to unlearn this populist perception of true individual and his or her right empowerment.

We need to unlearn the wrong hypotheses about individualism and self. We need to sit focused in our own self to question and re-question the populist hypotheses of successes, self-worth and happiness. We require to challenge the populist and clutter-culture hypotheses of attainments and possessions. We must ask to ourselves, why it is important to be happy all the time? Isn’t grief a realism; an empowering thing too? 

We should focus on our deep consciousness and ask the crucial question �" why should I not be lonely and feel empowered and be in the pool of wellness and excellence, rather than being in the drift and flux of inappropriate collective benchmarks of success and righteousness?

It has to be accepted that only a higher consciousness of a lonely and focused person, who has this facility of quality leisure for self, who can understand and accept this simple realism that if a hypothesis is wrong, the theory based on such hypothesis can never be right. Populist sense of both loneliness and contemporary benchmarks of successes are based on a wrong hypothesis of individualism and empowerment. This individualism in holistic sense is surely very empowering. However, we have the trouble of accepting the partial and wrong perception of individualism, ingrained in our minds by clutter culture, mass media and celebrity worldview. That is why all those populist theories based on this wrong and inappropriate hypothesis can never be right. We need to understand it in detail.

To understand this dualism of contemporary culture, we need to test the validity of this hypothesis-theory connection by picking up something, which is humanity’s most misunderstood and destructive natural drive. Yes, we are talking about sex and how this entire populist perception about the utility and worth of sex in contemporary clutter culture is flawed, because of wrong hypothesis. 

This shall reveal how, even while evolution has stopped, no more a guiding prudence for us; still, we mindlessly carry forward such obsolete and obstructive drives, which are causing us and the cultures a great distress. This is aimed at arriving to this new realism that loneliness is also such a drive, which is crippling us and we all need to unlearn it. We talk about it in detail in next chapter.

**

 

We’ve Outlived Utility Of Instinctive Drives,

Intellect Must Redesign Their Novel Worth

There is this singular and objective hypothesis, which if accepted, paves way for objective understanding of how we humans are what we are. This hypothesis is a result of the scientifically singular understanding of brain functioning, which engenders very powerful insight into how our consciousness works. As this hypothesis about consciousness is accepted, it shall be easy to understand and accept the realism about how we have loads of obsolete and obstructive notions about cognition and causality, which we have uselessly carried forward since ages. This is time to shift to the new cognition and causalities.

It is now to be accepted that we humans are not a logical and intelligent creature, if we do not have a specialized, education, training and sustained practice of good things we have learned. Humans are not born intelligent and logical; rather we are totally reactive, instinctive and intuitive creature. Our behaviours are determined entirely by a multidimensional process of interaction between our various instincts. These instincts are genetically determined neural mechanisms, provided by evolution for action and behaviour. There is no mechanism for intelligence or memory which is separate from sensory, motor and instinct mechanisms. 

The untrained and uneducated human is totally instinctive and not capable of objective reasoning or proper cultural behaviour under complex modern social environments. The human has been provided by evolution with instincts, which causes him to seek both training and education, as he or she is a competitive social animal. He is quite capable of logic, reason, and intelligence when he chooses to be so, provided that he learns and follows the necessary discipline and rigid methodology. Even then, he is instinctive in his goals. His instincts provide the direction, drive and power behind his every action.

Moreover, a section of scientists argue that nothing has remained instinctive in humans anymore as we all have been into this society and human made cultures since long. They believe, all instinctive drives of humans are not purely instinctive but coloured, shaped and conditioned by cultural benchmarks of action and behaviour.

However, there is no conflict in the two observations. No doubt, humanity has been impacted by two very powerful forces �" nature and nurture; that is their pure instincts and cultural sense of appropriate and righteousness. This is evident from the fact that most humans are split between what their instincts drive them to and what their cultural upbringing leads them to. That is why often, a person would say �" I am confused as whether I should listen to the call of my heart or that of my mind. An average person believes that there always are two calls on decision-making about an issue. One is from heart, which he or she believes is his or her gut feeling, which most people call visceral. Second voice comes from the mind, which most believe is the call of a culture within a person.

There is this preference of heart or visceral choice over the mind call as most believe, heart is where righteousness is, as average person believes, mind is devilish and it usually orchestrates complications, whereas heart is simple, pure and mostly right. This is populist psychology playing its part in everyone’s life and life-living choices. People love to listen to their hearts; that means most prefer to have the way their instincts lead them to. There is no doubt about the preference as, we already discussed how evolution has installed in us very powerful drives, which are so wired to the idea of survival that most of us lead ourselves the way our instinctive drive takes us to. Scientists say, even the culturally learnt behaviour finally becomes part of the instincts and that is why, it is accepted that humans are largely instinctive.

This works out as double trouble for humanity. Human mind mechanism has this wired facility to make most actions and behaviour as auto-mode, action-reaction causality. This is the reason most of us are in a perpetual state of drift and flux, which makes us auto-generate series of action-behaviour, the utility and worth of which we seldom think in a receptive-mode and retrospective thinking. That is why loneliness is some facility for us, which makes us sit focused over our auto-mode decision-making instincts, to assess about their true and right utility and worth.

Scientists maintain that modern human developed intellect in parallel with other physical and neural traits. Modern humans have risen well over evolutionary instincts and they have this intellectual duty to create and prolong a good culture, where there is intellectual control over instinctive drives, for larger wellness of the society. Only through the application of the intellect, utilizing experience, education and training, as control mechanisms over the raw instincts, appropriate cultural behaviour can be obtained.

Scientists say that most human drives are without conscience. They do not care about long-range effects. It seeks only immediate gratification. Modern knowledge of brain realism also accepts that consciousness is very localized. It instinctively being a reactive mode facility cares for only short term utility and worth.

If conscience exists, it exists in the intellect of the human. To be human is to allow the intellect to preside over the utility and worth of every important action-behaviour over the dimensions of time, space, people and processes. It is this necessary intellectual control of the instincts which makes a culture successful. We see contemporary cultures in drift and flux because majority of people are behaving true to their instincts, without much intellectual control and conscience. And, this intellectual control is a learned function and is called self-discipline, to over-ride less desirable instinctive behaviour.

That is why in most advanced contemporary cultures, where liberalism has unleashed uncontrolled instinctive drives of humanity, sans any intellectual self-control, the governments of the day have to spend huge moneys on police, jails and other emergency measures. Most modern cultures are failed cultures as the level of self-control in people in personal and societal spheres are very little and diminishing fast.

One such powerful instinctive drive of humanity, which has shattered most modern liberal cultures, because of ever reducing intellectual self-control is sex. This over-encompassing sex drive has lost its evolutionary role way back and it surely looks like an obstructive vestige of the obsolete evolution. Still, it dominates the human thinking and worldview in biggest possible way, overriding even survival sanity.

Evolution, at one point of time, many millions years back, switched from non-sexual reproductive procedures to sexual one as it had definitive benefits for species survival and genetic excellence. Evolution embedded sexual drive in neural wirings to ensure that human excelled over other species. This evolution then created gender roles and suitable physiological as well as neural differences were created in males and females. This scheme of things required that men always looked for sex and women used sex as selection tool for best mating option.

Things have changed in modern cultures. Evolution’s game plan is no more valid and no more required as traditional gender roles have changed and in liberal cultural scenario, sex has lost its old and tested evolutionary purpose. Moreover, in modern living, humanity does not have the old challenges of survival and species proliferation, as we are many times more in numbers on this planet and have managed to live quite long. We do not need to go into details as everyone knows, how modern cultures have placed sex in a rather demeaning and diminutive imagery as fun thing, thrill-tool and time-pass activity, rather than a reproductive tool.

In modern civilization, where success of cultures depends on how intellectual self-control is exercised over instinctive drives, just the inverse is happening. Sex was once an instinctive drive, designed for species needs millions of years back. Now that modern human life-living situation and overall cultural advancement has made those needs obsolete, what we need is intellectual self-control over this powerful sex drive, which has lost its primitive usage. We need to accept sex in a totally different light and perspective.

Though, it is a long and complicated scientific explanation as how our brains have been designed in long years of evolution; we just have to know and accept that unlike other human organs, human brain is not a single organ. It is rather a cooperative of many parts, evolved during different times of evolution, with each part being an addition to the old one, not a replacement. Therefore, what we need to accept is that our brain is not doing this favour of intellectual discretion to us. It still has the primitive brain, over which the new parts have piled up. That is why our brain still has the primitive instincts and drives. It also has modern logical parts but brain is not doing any automatic pruning for us. We have to exercise learnt and nurtured intellectual control over our instincts. Both instincts and intellect are part of our brain mechanism but this self-control thing works well only when we have evolved a higher consciousness. Instinctive behaviours are auto-mode, intellectual initiatives are not. Therefore, the intellectual self-control needs to be inculcated and persevered through conscious practice. This presupposes quality lonely time with self.

No doubt, human inventiveness and human intellectual prowess are potent mechanism, which can engender so much novelty out of even a waste. Sex however is such a beautiful human experience. With applied human intellect, modern humanity and cultures surely can turn this obsolete sex drive into a highly beautiful, artistic and worthy entity. 

There is this very subtle difference in cognition regarding so many life-living realisms, which produce two extreme causalities �" extremely beneficial or extremely calamitous. This difference in cognition is about how we hit a poise of higher purpose between tangible as well as intangible elements of some realism. This needs to be applied in the domain of sex. The tangibles of sex and physical intimacies have a very limited purpose, which are now evolutionary vestiges. We surely do not need sex in its primeval tangible form. However, the intangibles of sex are unlimited and they offer us so many sunny shades. The intangible elements of nurturance, mutuality, intimacy, cooperation, compassion, commitment, trust, etc are all very beneficial requirements for overall wellness of we all and all these elements must be made to ride on the tangibility of sex. Evolution has given us a vehicle, a medium, but what we carry on this vehicle is now the role of our intellect and higher consciousness.

This requires change in the age-old cognition about sex. We need to unlearn the populist perspectives about tangibility of sex and learn the intangibilities of sex, in the light of new wellness needs in modern times. The artistry of intellect to attain this change needs two key ingredients �" 

1. Intellectual self-control over our instincts, the primeval neural wiring...

2. Higher consciousness to evolve a new cognition for novel sex causalities...

As we said earlier, with applied human intellect, modern humanity and cultures surely can turn this obsolete sex drive into a highly beautiful, artistic and worthy entity.

It is a similar situation with loneliness. We have to unlearn its tangible aspects to change the old cognition about it as a bad and debilitating thing. Then, we need to apply our intellect to redesign a new cognition, which sees and accepts the beautiful and beneficial intangible elements of loneliness.

We all just need to accept that there are things, which need to change. We are no more what we used to be millions of years back, when the evolution wired in us so many of our current drives. As these drives are still there and we surely cannot delete them from our genetic makeup, we have to fast unlearn the obsolete roles and worth of these drives and design new intellectual meaning and utility of these drives.

Similarly, loneliness was once a very meaningful tool evolution wired in us so that we all could drop our individualistic streak and fall back to society, culture and other collectivity as our survival chances were good only when we lived in groups and interacted in mutuality mode. However, modern living and contemporary cultures have outlived the utility of loneliness. This collectivity, over-connect with cultures and being part of the crowded mainstream worldview itself has become a huge burden on individual as together, they are triggering more chaos, conflict and confusion, because of the constant drift and flux, they keep us into. It is time we unlearn the obsolete instinctive perception, role and utility of loneliness. 

We need loads of self-control, self-discipline and self-awareness of high order to intellectually re-design the rules of individuality as well as our social needs. Times have changed, the world we live in has changed, life-living realism has changed. That is why we also have to intellectually design such changes in ourselves and in our mainstream cultures, which make both individuals as well as cultures become successful.

Scientists say, evolution is a stupid engineering. Things in distant past happened as accidents, and in time, many of such accidents, which evolution opted for as bare survival input, were labelled as successes. Scientists say, we have come to a stage, where we are no more a puppet in the hands of accidental evolution. Scientists say, future of humanity is in designing excellence, not survival. All future evolutions shall no more be accidental, but planned after very mindful and conscious intellectual rumination.

**

 

Loneliness: Call Of Instincts For Self-Actualization

Of Potentials Within, To Be Our Own Buddha

If we put all the above ideas in linearity, if we sum up things, it seems clear that all things start with mind consciousness and end there. Even the drives may be bio-chemical but they are expressed as per the mind consciousness of different people. All people have the same sex drive. However, as these drives are conditioned by cultural learning as well as an individual’s own meme or shade of consciousness, different people express their sexuality in contrastingly different ways �" both physically as well as mentally. Drives may be common but their expressions are varied, depending on subjective individuality. Same with loneliness!

This is the core realism, which we now have to understand and accept. It is consciousness, which defines and determines our cognition �" that is the way we perceive and accept realism. And, this subjective cognition in turn shapes the causality �" the logical connection between various factors in the cause-effect cyclicality, in all of us. That is why we all need to understand and accept that prime winner or loser is consciousness �" this subjective sense of I or the self. That is why empowerment of consciousness is the cardinal and core task every single person has to do in his or her life. More poised and empowered your consciousness, far streamlined, settled and balanced is your cognition and causality. This ensures, you have a life-living situation within yourself, which stands you in perfect wellness and excellence with all elements and factors in milieus outside.

Thousands of years back, the wise of humanity said, ‘Nothing external to you have any meaning and impact on you’. Modern science also says the same thing. All realism is within us �" this mystically marvellous consciousness is the seat of all realism. Consciousness shapes all realism because consciousness shapes cognition and this then moulds causality. This 3Cs process is an internalized process. From outside, all people are the same and all of us have the same drives, same body-mind mechanism. Still, there are loads of differences about how different people believe and accept outside realism as. This difference is within �" different memes and shades of consciousness do the trick.

That is why common drives engender uncommon realism for us. We all know this story about a king, who had a few thousand beautiful young women in his harem, whom he ordered to be killed to be replaced by more number of women. This is a tale common in all cultures. Kings had large harems and still they were not sexually happy and satisfied. Moreover, we also have this common story in all cultures as how a man or a woman killed themselves as they could not imagine to live anymore after the demise of their partners.

What makes it happen? The king and the common lover both have the same sex drive. Both have the same body-mind mechanism. However, their perception and perspective about sex and intimacy varies so much, on two different extremes of the scale. This happens because of the difference in consciousness. Sex is a physical or tangible tool for attainment of an intangible worth called intimacy. This intimacy is not physical, tangible or material. Sex is tangible and physical. Drives are body realism but they are expressed and attained in mind realism. All worthy attainments of humanity are intangibles, endowed in physicality but attainable through intangibility of mind consciousness.

In modern clutter culture, sex has become the tool of greatest dismay and disarray. This harem syndrome is almost everywhere. People in drift and flux accept sex as physical thing and value little about the intangibilities of intimacy, affection and compassion, which are more meaningful aspects of sex. The physicality and tangibility of sex has led to the king’s attitude towards sex. More sex partners, more physicality but lesser intimacy, lesser intangible satisfaction and happiness.

Similar is the situation about loneliness. Like sex, our instinctive drive makes us go for connect with more people. This drive makes the individual to accept that success and self-worth shall be attained more when more and more people shall know and accept it. So, like sex, we indulge in the physicality and tangibility of the mental and intangible need called connect. However, more we connect physically, lonelier we grow. Deeper we enter into this crowd of drifted and fluxed culture, more disconnected and dissatisfied we stand.

This connect has to be an internalized realism. People first need to be connected within, and then only outside connect can be fruitful and satisfactory. As is the reality, nothing external can have any meaning and impact on us if it is not internalized first. That is why the wise of even contemporary culture put premium on self-awareness, self-analysis and self-actualization. This process is the internalization mechanism and this surely needs loads of self-control and self-discipline. And to start that, one needs to come out of the drift and flux of life.

As we earlier accepted, if we are in empowering company of internalized and intangible emotions of affection, compassion, mutuality and intimacy with self �" with our own higher consciousness; we shall never feel loneliness as a burdened realism. Rather, we shall feel and accept loneliness as a very empowering facility of consciousness, leading us to life-living wellness and personal excellence. Once we have our higher consciousness in perfect poise of purpose, we shall enjoy the magical-mystical-marvellous intangibles of all things tangible in our lives. Then, sex shall be extremely satisfying, as we shall be in harmonious company of intimacy, affection and compassion. Then, loneliness shall be rewarding!

We all know about epiphany moments of life-living experiences but very few of us actually live its magnanimous magnificence. Higher consciousness lands us with epiphanies of life and living. All endowments and attainments then become multidimensional, unleashing spectrum of true and everlasting happiness and satisfaction.

Loneliness, like sex is very misunderstood realism. Look, how all over the globe, so many people are being drawn to meditation. It is growingly being understood and accepted that larger humanity has never understood their drives well. It is now accepted that somehow, most of our life-living troubles emanate out of our poor handling of our instincts and drives. That is why our cultures are so cluttered and dysfunctional.

Globally, in many cultures, people are accepting the ancient wellness principle that humanity needs to redefine, redesign and reapply their drives of hunger, sex and social needs. And how to go about it? The primary requirement is addressing your higher consciousness. It is not easy for most in clutter culture as focusing on the self, which is in definitive self-control of all the sensory pulls and drives is a tough task. That is why for many, who find themselves cluttered, meditation extends a handy tool to start the journey inside.

In all cultures, we have had so many greats, who understood and accepted the importance of the joy of connecting to the real self. They could attain greatness only because they realized that primary task for everyone is to hit the poise within. They understood the importance of deep-rootedness of consciousness in a milieu, where self was addressed only to own self. In Indian spiritual traditions, especially in Yoga philosophy, meditation was emphasized for befriending the self. In other Oriental tradition, there is a word called Shikan Taza, which literally means ‘Just Sit’. These techniques are for empowering the consciousness by focusing on self, to internalize all joys and satisfaction within.

Therefore, it is important that we understand loneliness in a completely new light. We have to understand and accept that loneliness is your first intelligence, beckoning your drifted and fluxed consciousness to come out of it and start the journey of self-exploration. Most greats used this precarious energy of loneliness this way. Buddha was a king’s son and was raised in all worldly endowments, with all the material glitter, glam and indulgence intentionally made splattered around him. He was young, had a beautiful wife and a lovely son. Still, he felt loneliness in his world of drift and flux. This lonely feeling paved way for him to attain Nirvana.

He left everything. As there was no poise of purpose within him, he felt unease and more loneliness. He later discovered that world had grief and troubles but leaving the world and turning a saint was no solution. He realized that it was the poised mind, which was the solution of all grief and troubles. He advocated self-actualization of this poised being, which in modern scientific lexicon is called higher consciousness. Buddha’s life-living philosophy is a very contemporary need. In all eastern spiritual traditions, there is this emphasis on self-actualization. They insist that all realisms are within this poise mind or higher consciousness. Even God is within this mind consciousness.

We all have a Buddha within ourselves. Who is a Buddha? Buddha means the enlightened and empowered. Therefore, being Buddha means actualization of the potential of our conscious self, which is already there within us. This potential is dormant, or un-evolved, or untouched in most of us. Also, in all of us, there always happens a time and space, where we feel disenchanted with the world we live in and with the people we are surrounded with. As the scientists say, the very people and the very material consumptions, which make us thrilled and happy once, are the primary source of our disenchantment, heartbreaks and ultimately the loneliness. The Yoga philosophy said the same 3000 years back!

Therefore, loneliness feeling must be accepted as the clarion call of our own instincts to get ready for the ultimate journey of personal empowerment and self-actualization. It beckons to herald the process of making us Buddha �" the enlightened one. Later, when we shall talk about homeostasis, we shall get to know the term set point. This is a biological term for a body facility, which is wired in our mind to make us return to our mean-wellness point. Being Buddha also somehow hints at being in the poise, the set-point of body-mind mechanism. This poise emotion is embedded deep within us. We miss this as we are not self-aware and in a drifted and fluxed consciousness.

Therefore, loneliness is a very positive and very beneficial mechanism in we all and it must be accepted this way. May be, it is our instinctive design that loneliness feeling has been drafted as the alarm bell, when our minds become too much cluttered to threaten our own wellness and beneficial survival. It may be like the alarm bell of your washing machine, which starts a loud beep alarm, when we overload it.

However, the prudent thing is, before this alarm bell rings, we all must be aware of the threshold of the mind consciousness to bear with this cultural clutter. Why wait for the alarm bell. Start the journey towards higher consciousness. Never commit the mistake of loading your washing machine with more clothes, if its overload alarm bell rings.

**

 

Reshape Cognition Of Emotions Of Reward And Rejection

To Get Nirvana From Causality Of Gain And Loss

In understanding loneliness in new light and designing it in a positive and beneficial way, we also need to talk about our mechanism of emotions. Science clearly says, you are as lonely as you think and feel you are. Therefore, it has to be accepted that our emotional state of consciousness has got much to do with how we accept ourselves as. Emotions and cognition are inter-dependent realism for us. That is why emotional poise is so crucial for wellness. We can hit the poise if we understand the mechanism of our emotions well.

We all need to understand why poise of emotions are important in our life-living wellness scheme of things. It is also very important to know why the primary emotions of reward and rejection must not be associated exclusively or predominantly with tangibles of life. We have to accept as why it is ideal to come out of this cognition of emotions of reward and rejection, to get final emancipation (nirvana) from this causality �" this cyclicality of gain and loss, reward and rejection. This emotion of reward and rejection is at the core of loneliness feelings and that is why a detailed understanding of the emotional mechanism of our body-mind structures shall help us in a big way to deftly handle loneliness.

Not many of us feel comfortable to accept ourselves as one of the many species on earth. The reality however remains that humans are also a product of millions of years of evolution and we are also largely a bio-chemical mechanism. Most of our behaviours and actions are the complex handiwork of different bio-chemicals, which we know as hormones. Evolution, as scientists accept, is a stupid engineering. It does not seek excellence but orchestrates simple patch up work to engender a species and its mechanism to barely survive. Therefore, most of our workings are simple hormonal action-reaction mechanism. The primary hormones are of reward and rejection. We all are induced to an action or behaviour because of the emotion of reward and get retracted from something because of the emotion of rejection and punishment.

Science has now begun to understand the complex functioning of hormones and how they affect our moods, our action-behaviour and overall feeling of wellness. We do not have to go into the details of different hormones and their associated emotions. But we have to understand that emotions and hormones are associated with each other in a very intricate causality. Emotions are affected by external factors in milieus and they in turn affect the secretion of hormones. The affected hormones then impact the emotions in associated way, which makes us see external factors in the milieus in an affected way.

Though it is a complex issue, involving scientific explanations, here we just simply have to understand that emotions and feelings are different entities. Emotions involve tangible and physical elements, mostly from the external milieus, we interact with. Emotions involve physical change in the environment. You see something and here comes the emotion of fear. However, what our body-mind mechanism does in response to the emotions come in the form of intangible and is known as feelings. The emotions and resultant feelings are also in a subjective causality, as they involve two different elements of tangible as well as intangible. This causality itself is very interesting and is an outcome of the causality between emotions and hormones.

For example, you once loved a person but off late, you have some troubles with that person. So, may be, when that person says something, and as you do not feel rewarded in his or her company anymore, you shall doubt his or her intentions in whatever he or she says. The words may be innocuous or even well-meant for you but as the emotion is under the influence of the feelings of doubt, you may experience unease about it. Therefore, your emotion of reward or rejection may shape and colour the factors in the external milieus. This emotion actually changes your cognition and this in turn changes the causality.

We have known earlier that scientists define loneliness subjectively, saying that you consider yourself as lonely as you feel. This feeling of loneliness is subjective because it is an outcome of the emotions you are in. When scientists insist that loneliness must be seen as an interior, subjective experience, not an external, objective condition, they wish to put the idea to the fore that your subjective emotions decide your cognition and causality, which in turn impacts your consciousness. That is why we are putting so much importance on the emotional scale on which you are. Understanding our emotions and how our hormonal mechanism impacts us can help us master the art to handle loneliness in an empowered way.

Now that we accept how important emotions are for our wellness and how hormones work in a stupid cyclicality, presiding over much of what we act and behave; we can design our life-living spheres in such a way that we remain in a perpetual state of emotional poise. We surely can rise above the cyclicality which hormones, emotions and external milieus work on us, affecting our consciousness, cognition and causality.

It is not that only modern science has made us know and accept all these. More than three thousand years back, the wise of humanity had understood that matters or any tangible entity in the external milieus have very little to do with our wellness and happiness. What mattered was the internal emotional state. There are so many intangible aspects within, which make us accept things which are tangible, in happy ways. Faith, affection, compassion, sense of mutuality, intimacy, etc are intangibles, elements of emotions, which make us accept all things tangible in external milieus positively. If we have trust, love and compassion for a person, he or she shall be in our wellness scheme of things and his or her company shall be rewarding for us. We then happily forgive and forget, even if that person has some weakness or troubled spot. As the wise say, ‘nothing is lost if love is not lost, nothing is there if love is not’.

Even in a race or a marathon, all runners may have the similar physical strength and physical training. However, that wins who has well-poised intangibles of confidence, perseverance, self-belief, etc. It is as clear as anything that it is always the intangibles of life-living experiences, which are decisive elements and factors in our cognition �" the way we see and accept things in external milieu as well as within. That is why, we need to understand, whether it is love, sex or loneliness feelings, the ruling elements of cognition of the realism are always intangibles �" those elements, which are in our mind consciousness, not real but virtual. That is why, in all these aspects of life, the wellness, happiness, satisfaction, worthiness, utility etc are all in our side �" within us, within our mind consciousness, which is a virtual agency. In a very limited way, the persons, who are objects or subjects of our desires, are responsible for our wellness.

That is why the wise in all ages and all fields of wisdom insist that happy and settled people must always align their wellness to intangibles of life and never the tangibles or material. The material entities may give you initial thrill, but never the lasting sense of wellness and satisfaction. That is why we said in the start of this chapter that it is important that the primary emotions of reward and rejection must not be associated with tangibles of life. It is ideal to come out of this cognition of emotions of reward and rejection, based on material attainments, to get final emancipation (nirvana) from this causality �" this cyclicality of gain and loss, reward and rejection.

We need to accept and internalize the fact that whether we feel rewarded or rejected, it has got much to do with how we accept these external factors. When we felt rewarded, the external elements �" like a good friend, lover, neighbour, etc, too were just the objects, not the subjects as the real subject is the ‘I’, our own mind consciousness, who had this subjective cognition to accept it as some happy and rewarding thing. The emotions of reward were a mechanism of our body-mind structures as the hormones released in our body signalled the mind consciousness to feel rewarded. If the hormones were not there, you would not have felt the same. 

So, the crucial point is �" the mechanism of cognition, this subjective sense or feeling of being either rewarded or rejected is inside us. External factors in milieus outside us are just the objects. The real subject of our action and behaviour is within us. And, this cognition is a virtual function �" a process involving intangibilities of mind consciousness. This mind consciousness we can master to not only reverse the cognition of reward or rejection, but also accept them in equanimity. This is crucial.

Be it science, or spiritualism of all times, the wise have insisted that this equanimity in its holistic cognition and causality is the most desired intangibility for the attainment of this very endowed and empowered higher consciousness. The Buddhist teachings, the Zen masters, the ancient Indian spiritual traditions, all in unison speak about the attainment of true and real possession of life �" this equanimity and poise of purpose.

In modern scientific terminology of 3Cs, it is the same. Science says, consciousness is a virtual agency. It is a bridge between the body and mind. That is why consciousness always aligns with intangibles of life-living experiences for lasting wellness, happiness and satisfaction. The tangibles give only momentary thrill but ultimately become the causality of pain and loneliness.

There is this very pragmatic and self-evident realism that the powerful energy of joy in consumption and resultant emotion of being rewarded is entwined with its end in pain, discontinuity and ultimate sense of regret. There is this famous metaphor of equating it with the joy of itching. It starts with so much pleasure when we scratch an itch. If we continue with it, it finally ends up in sharp pain and even bleeding in very short time.

The idea is that the very core and perennial realization of painful mortality and regret of any gratification joy or rewarding feeling from consumption of material things, even while we are at the peak of its enjoyment, is there from the very start. The fruit of gratification and reward has seeds of pain and regret of its inevitable discontinuity loaded within it.

This is a simple causality, which we all see and can easily accept, about the modern cognitive sense about contemporary life-living in clutter culture. The more we indulge into material things, like connecting physically to the clutter culture, consuming more, mad multitasking, having more sex, etc, more lonely and rejected we feel. The more you scratch an itch, more initial joys and more ultimate pain and regret. The reward of tangibles ends in rejection feelings and ultimate pain of loneliness.

In the next chapter, we shall discuss in details as how science as well as all spiritual traditions advise us to accept a new higher consciousness, which shall have this ideal cognition for a wellness causality, leading us to the very desired equanimity and poise situation.

**

 

Journey From Unsettled, Conflicted Loneliness

To Finality And Fruition Of Joyous Onlyness

Ancient Indian wisdom called the consciousness as drishta, a virtual agency, which sees and observes the intelligence of a person, which his or her current consciousness lands him or her in. The consciousness has been referred to as the observer of human intelligence, which decides the matrix for any decision of life, in the larger realism of drishya (nature and culture). 

The Indian spiritual philosophy observes that the drishya and drishta (nature and consciousness) are continuously interacting with each other in a cyclic causality, in which, each affects other and in turn gets affected. The randomly multidimensional juxtaposition of drishya and drishta engenders different cyclical expressions of disposition. These cyclical expressions are infinite and all of them lead an individual to pains and troubles. This is because; these expressions link or align the ‘self’, the consciousness with discontinuous and immortal elements of drishya and drishta. 

The interaction of drishya and drishta elements leads an individual to both gratification as well as renunciation. The Indian spiritual philosophy maintains that this cycle of gratification and renunciation is such a naturally intense and powerful realism that most people on earth remain attracted to it and become a part of the cyclic drift.

To come out of this cyclic causality of gratification and renunciation, which takes one away and aloof from this powerful drift is the role and function of this super consciousness. This is the difficult part of the entire idea of consciousness. This is probably an idea, which is tough for the consciousness to imagine. The practice of it is far more difficult. The yoga philosophy says, there is a state of super consciousness, which is called ‘kaivalya’. This Sanskrit word has almost no parallel word in modern languages. We can say, it literally means a state of singleness, a conscious position of onlyness. 

For most of us, it is difficult to understand its true meaning as since long; we have been accustomed to collective and mutual existence and awareness of self. There is so much of contemporary culture within our conscious and subconscious minds. We are so used to our consciousness in complete collaboration and concomitance with our external as well as internal milieus that for us, an idea in the domain of total and perfect singleness and onlyness is beyond even imagination. The idea, as elaborated by Indian spiritual philosophy enshrines that super consciousness is a state of being, where there is complete and perfect lack of any connection, causality and coexistence between the drishta and drishya. The subject, the consciousness, which observes the nature and the decision-making matrices of life, becomes completely free and detached from the causality and utility of external as well as internal milieus and nature. This super consciousness is a state of singleness and onlyness �" the kaivalya state of consciousness.

The idea is �" in both the consciousnesses of gratification as well as renunciation, if there is causality and utility of the subject with object, the consciousness acquires the element of ego and sense of self, as distinct and different from others. This ego has to go in the state of super consciousness, as this element of sense of self is actually a mortal and discontinuous element. Kaivalya is a state of consciousness, which is devoid of ego and sense of self as this state is the true element of immortality and continuity. The singleness and onlyness has only a singular element of continuity and immortality. This sense of self needs to go away then only one can truly attain the state of kaivalya, the state of singleness and onlyness. 

This is very tough. There have been people on earth, who attained greatness and even understood the utility of it all. They became saints and helped the masses. Still, they could not devoid themselves of the sense of self, and this made them create rifts between different persons. The evil, which all cultures portray in human beings is this sense of self, which remains attached to egoistic attitudes. Kaivalya is possible only when this sense of self withers completely. Even greats are affected by the attributes of inertia and they stop practicing when they attain greatness. This dooms them and humanity. Kaivalya needs to be practiced lifelong. 

This is the state, in yogic philosophy, where jeevatma (human soul/consciousness) unites with parmatma (cosmic soul/consciousness). This is what they called yoga, the union. The different yogasanas are different ways to discipline your body and consciousness to arrive at the state of kaivalya. This is also something, the spiritual philosophy of Geeta, the chief holy book of Hinduism says. Somehow, the modern concepts of psychosynthesis and psychoenergetics also work around the similar ideas.

There is a cardinal rule to the success of every enterprise of life. At the start, every enterprise looks huge and tough. Human mind, as we discussed, is not good at seeing far ahead. Therefore, it is always advised to take small steps towards achievement of part of the enterprise and set aim for smaller goals. Your innocence and honesty is your best preparations to attain your goals. 

The simple idea is; it is your imagination, which makes you a winner, when you have to make any important decision in life. This imagination puts you above and aloof from the immediate milieus, culture and body-mind instincts, which often either blur your judgment or keep you in a flux. Worse, it makes you drift with it, beyond your conscious control. 

You have to use your power of conscious imagination to accept your being and self as someone, not only your body, not only your mind, not only your milieus and not even the interaction between them. You have to accept it as some super consciousness, which observes each of your thought-action-behaviour matrices from a position above and aloof from all the dimensions of your consciousness and being. This enables you to hold every emotion, instinct and ideas back for a while, sit over them with an objective and independent super consciousness.

As this super consciousness is a receptive mode facility, you shall be endowed with a power to observe and control all your instinctive and culturally induced thought-action-behaviour of action-reaction mode. As you keep practicing to remain in this super consciousness self, you shall finally attain the kaivalya realism. Then, this super consciousness shall become your single and only consciousness. 

This is the stage where, you become the conscious decider of what should ideally present yourself with your decision-matrix at any point of time in your life. This is a sure facility for personalizing your own wellness and making them independent of milieus, culture and instincts. Anything you wish to attain in life, in societal milieu, which cultural benchmarks label as worthy, you shall decisively find yourself in competition and conflict with so many others, who want the same attainment and that too exclusively. The success of the enterprise shall only partly depend on your efforts and merits as there shall always be many factors in milieu and people, which shall be equally decisive. 

That is why successes in our societies are exception, not a rule. However, when you wish to attain something, which is possible only just by your simple and innocent resolve, you shall be always successful. Like your resolve to find utility and worth in intangibles like love, compassion or attach value to being in nature with trees and birds is only your own personal attainment. This enterprise is successful any number of times you do it. 

The ancient philosophies tell us to align ourselves only with intangibles as utility because; our own consciousness has worth only as intangible. Our consciousness is intangible and continuous and that is why, it shall find lasting and continuous wellness only in intangible elements. That is why, the philosophy prescribes, true and lasting relationship can happen only between similar and generic elements. Our consciousness is intangible and values the intangibles in our lives more than anything. 

If we align our consciousness with value, worth and utility in tangibles, there is bound to be pain, conflict and confusion as these elements are not similar and generic to the true character of our consciousness. This is the change we all need to instil in our conscious mind. 

For this to happen, loneliness is the first conscious initiative towards the attainment of onlyness.

**

 

Beautifully Beneficial Causality Among

Homeostasis, We, Wellness & Wisdom

Scientific evidences maintain that ageing is 30 percent gene function and 70 percent lifestyle choices. Homeostasis decides it all. Anthropologists say, more than 100,000 years ago when hunting and gathering were the primary economic activities, humankind was in a homeostatic equilibrium with the natural environment. We have lost it way back. 

Global researches confirm that the aggregate levels of happiness and well being are not appreciably higher now than they were at the end of World War II (1945), even though per capita income has increased by several hundred percent and in all aspects of life and living, we are now many times better off and comfortable.

It is not that these are stupid data or findings of a science lab, which we are not aware of. It surely looks like we all feel it but cannot say why? We all somehow promptly confirm, something is hugely amiss around us, but when it comes to pinpointing it, we have trouble. Be it our body, mind, family system, society at large, cultures, nations or global order, we all feel, things are not the way it needs to be and there is something small or big, which we are missing, which makes us uncomfortable, missing the desired wellness. 

It is not that humanity is not doing anything about all this. There are researches going on. Lots of money and intellect are being invested to know exactly what and why. However, somehow, it is not such a complicated thing that an individual, busy in his or her life and living blues cannot understand and answer. It is indeed a simple common sense, which humanity, some thousands of years back could fathom and point out.

What we are about to discuss under the name Homeostasis is essentially a biological term but has utility and reference in all walks of life and living. We are simply talking of the balance, poise, equability, equilibrium, equanimity and what we have learnt since ages - The Golden Mean. In all our religious books, folklores, spiritual discourses, philosophies and societal wisdom talks, we can find the core concept of balance or poise in everything we perceive, accept and do. The poise and balance is surely not an external idea or a value that is alien to us. It is in fact what we have been designed for and is very much our central mechanism. We are endowed with it but seldom at it!

The key is however to understand this poise, which is the central design of our body and mind and also to seek to extend this idea to all aspects of life and living choices. This is important as we now stand at a juncture of evolution where we have lost this crucial and critical balance or poise since long and need to restore for not only the survival and excellence of the self, but the human race itself. The words below explain in detail the idea of this balance and the factors that we have in our immediate and surrounding environment as well as in our life and living choices that threaten and affect very badly this critical balance.

The explanation about the idea of homeostasis is scientific and it needs expert knowledge. That is why I accept that most things about the concept of homeostasis, I have taken from what experts have said. Even most of the words in the following paragraphs, about homeostasis are that of the experts, not truly mine. I surely cannot explain it in layman’s terms as it shall not be appropriate. What I am doing is trying to correlate the idea of scientific concept of homeostasis with the realism of loneliness. I am using the idea of homeostasis, as outlined by experts, with my own perspective of how loneliness is a positive and beneficial endowment for the attainment and perpetuation of this very crucial body-mind need of homeostasis.

Talking about homeostasis, the human organism consists of trillions of cells all working together for the maintenance of the entire organism. While cells may perform very different functions, all the cells are quite similar in their metabolic requirements. Maintaining a constant internal environment with all that the cells need to survive, like oxygen, glucose, mineral ions, waste removal, etc is necessary for the well-being of individual cells and the well-being of the entire body. The varied processes by which the body regulates its internal environment are collectively referred to as homeostasis.

Homeostasis in a general sense refers to stability, poise, balance or equilibrium. It is the body's attempt to maintain a constant internal environment. Maintaining a stable internal environment requires constant monitoring and adjustments as conditions change. This adjusting of physiological systems within the body is called homeostatic regulation. Because the internal and external environment of the body is constantly changing and adjustments must be made continuously to stay at or near the set point, homeostasis can be thought of as a synthetic equilibrium.

Homeostasis then is more than just balance, it is the combination of changing parts within the body that are constantly in different states, yet also constantly adapting to internal and external variables in their environment.

Science says, homeostasis allows the body to adapt to a wide variety of environments, both internally and externally. In order for the body to maintain healthy, it needs to remain in a state of balance, homeostasis. When the body is unable to maintain homeostasis, disease often ensues. A great many factors can affect the body in such a way as to throw off homeostasis. Stress is one of these many factors. As is commonly known, stress on the body can induce both physical and psychological changes in the body.

Science says, while the body is able to adjust to natural changes within the body, and generally without (temperature changes, etc), it cannot adjust to activities which we subject ourselves to. Smoking promotes changes within the body which homeostasis has no control over. It cannot defend against the harmful effects of smoking, drinking alcohol in excess, or depriving our bodies of necessary sleep and nutrients. Poor dietary habits can take a toll on the body for which homeostasis can do nothing to recover balance.

We have gone a long distance on the wrong path since ages. The environment we live in is so much polluted, the food we eat is so unhealthy and lacking natural sanity, the lifestyle we lead is so full of excesses and extremities that together they all put us off this precious balance, miles apart. Most of modern degenerative diseases, also called lifestyle-diseases are the result of this affected homeostasis of human body, living choices and external environment.

What is important is to know that disease and cellular malfunction can be caused in two basic ways: either, deficiency (cells not getting all they need) or toxicity (cells being poisoned by things they do not need). Contemporary environment and lifestyle choices are doing both at the same time and that too very badly. In our fast-paced lives and peer-pressured race for unending marathon of instant-self-gratifications, we are not only depriving our bodies of the basic needs for survival but also adding hell lot of toxicity than our bodies could handle. Survival is all about homeostasis in nature as well as nurture domains. Tragically, we live in a cluttered milieu and annihilated nature as well as nurture.

Now, it is crucial to understand and accept, how in our drift and flux lives, we are actually killing our homeostasis, which in turn is creating havoc with our life-living wellness and personal excellence. It is so very important to understand and accept that in addition to the internal control mechanisms, there are external influences based primarily on lifestyle choices and environmental exposures that influence our body's ability to maintain cellular health. They are:

Nutrition: If your diet is lacking in a specific vitamin or mineral your cells will function poorly, possibly resulting in a disease condition. Usually people take overdose of macro nutrients like carbohydrate, protein and fat but seldom nourish their bodies with micronutrients like vitamins and very important minerals which are key to homeostasis and homoeostasis regulation. We need to understand, a deficiency of even a nondescript mineral called zinc could create havoc with body homeostasis. Equally crucial are potassium, calcium, phosphorus, etc. Balanced diet in today’s fast-paced life is most crucial requirement and this is what most people ignore. It needs to be reminded that in contemporary clutter culture, the mass media, pep psychologists, markets and celebrities are all spreading inappropriate and extrapolated information about not only right food and right diet but almost all aspects of life-living choices. That is why there is that overload of confusion about what is right and good for us. We need to stop and check things for our wellness.

Toxins: Any substance that interferes with cellular function, causing cellular malfunction are toxins. This is done through a variety of ways; chemical, plant, insecticides, and/or bites. A commonly seen example of this is drug overdoses. When a person takes too much of a drug their vital signs begin to waver; either increasing or decreasing, these vital signs can cause problems including coma, brain damage and even death. As per latest info, an average American has 12 prescriptions a year. All over the globe, average people too are taking far many medicines than necessary. In America, more people die of prescription drugs than any other single disease. Moreover, the toxins in the environment in major cities are major culprits of homeostasis. The air we breathe, especially in bigger cities is calamitous. The food we eat is so much laced with harmful chemicals, pesticides and adulteration that every day we are adding loads of toxins in our bodies. The toxicity has already penetrated to genes and dangerous mutations are devastating next generation.

Psychological: Your physical health and mental health are inseparable. Our thoughts and emotions cause chemical changes to take place either for better as with meditation, or worse as with stress. Our hormones, which are agents of homeostasis, get hugely affected by our mind state and lifestyle choices. The psychological factors are the most crucial ones in degrading homeostasis. It has been found that in modern living spaces, most diseases have psychological reasons which finally take the shape of psychosomatic diseases. They get listed in broad classification of lifestyle diseases, which are the largest killers and cripplers of humanity in contemporary clutter culture. It has been clearly stated that when in a mind state of chaos and confusion or state of extremities, the hormones of the body get very poorly affected. As homeostasis is largely a function of hormonal interplay in the body, volatility of hormones causes havoc with homeostatic balance. This calamity is cyclic.

Physical: Physical maintenance is essential for our cells and bodies. Adequate rest, sunlight, and exercise are examples of physical mechanisms for influencing homeostasis. Lack of sleep is related to a number of ailments such as irregular cardiac rhythms, fatigue, anxiety and headaches. It is the most common trouble of clutter culture. In a zeal to multitask, remain ever-connected and be in ever-happy mode, people are not only not sleeping enough hours but have also become victims of disturbed sleep. People generally believe that a walk in the evening or morning is sufficient. It is not. If you understand human evolution, you can easily understand how much physical labour is required for the maintenance of body balance. This natural body homeostasis was disturbed 10,000 years back when humans developed farming and started living a settled life. Consider what sort of life we lead. A good game of tennis, half an hour of swimming daily or some good running is the bare minimum we need. However, it also has to accept that rest and work go hand in hand. Either of the two is a recipe of disaster.

Genetic/Reproductive: Inheriting strengths and weaknesses can be part of our genetic makeup. Genes are sometimes turned off or on due to external factors which we can have some control over, but at other times little can be done to correct or improve genetic diseases. 

Medical: Because of genetic differences some bodies need help in gaining or maintaining homeostasis. Through modern medicine our bodies can be given different props, but the potential for harmful effects is present. Most drugs have side effects and inappropriate drug administration is commonplace. Whether by infections, or wrong dosage of medication, homeostasis can be altered by that which is trying to fix it. Trial and error with medications can cause potential harmful reactions and possibly death, if not caught soon enough.

The factors listed above all have their effects at the cellular level, whether harmful or beneficial. It also has to be understood that the homeostasis imbalance in one system out of many body systems alone can cause other systems under stress as all systems are linked. We need to understand various body systems, which are related with each other for well-being. So, if our digestive system is in poor homeostasis, other systems like respiratory system or circulatory system also becomes stressed.

This however is not all about this very crucial realism of homeostasis. Homeostasis is not only about biological or physiological; it has wider manifestations. There are a growing number of economists, psychologists and other social scientists that have become interested in research on the determinants of wellness and happiness. It has been found after years of rigorous researches that individuals achieve a higher state of well being and happiness when they are in a homeostatic equilibrium, in larger sense of the term. This equilibrium state has physical, emotional, psychological, spiritual and environmental dimensions. Behaviour adjusts to restore the individual to homeostatic equilibrium through a combination of physical, emotional, behavioural and psychological adjustments. This behavioural readjustment is known as Allostasis.

It is now beyond doubt that when people are in a nurturing and free environment where there is trust, stability, good health, a satisfactory work environment, companionship with friends and family, people are generally happy and have a strong sense of well being. This represents the attainment of a homeostatic equilibrium at the environmental social, emotional and psychological levels.

However, overall homeostatic poise is not a permanent realism. Throughout their lives, people experience excitations to this equilibrium. Some of these excitations may be positive �" a better job, promotion, birth of a child, marriage, movement to a better and more desirable living environment, greater security and trust, development of a more well integrated social life, exercise and more robust health, enjoyment of hobbies, friends and family, and so on. This would lead to a higher level of well being as the individual moves to a new homeostatic equilibrium. On the other hand, a downward displacement from a homeostatic equilibrium would lead to a lower level of well being. 

Experts say, it is interesting that at a more fundamental level, the underlying model and motivations that drive behaviour in a model of homeostatic and allostatic adjustment are different from the maximizing calculus (instant-self-gratification) of microeconomic theory. Rather than decision being motivated by purely cognitive factors, the adjustment mechanism that drives behaviours in the case of homeostasis, involves a combination of cognitive as well as emotional imperatives.

This is interesting. Researches maintain that incomes do matter; comfort has a role in wellness but only till a stage. As wellness is a function of wider homeostasis, which includes factors, which are not only cognitive but also emotional, a person is in complete wellness when there is a balance between the cognitive factors such as income, wealth, comfort, leisure and health as well as emotional factors such as trust, security, integration with family-friends-colleagues, connectivity, stability, sense of desirability and spiritual purpose, etc. 

Research confirmed that across geographies and ethnicity, people have shown the general tendency to move towards restoration of this homeostasis in case of a major shift away from it. This clearly suggests, like our biological system, homeostasis is our natural and desirable state of being, in all aspects of our life and living choices and there is a natural and instinctive urge to restore it. We are designed to act and behave in a way to return to set point of poise.

However, what is very important to understand and accept here is that even as most behaviour and actions of average people are aimed at attaining or restoring this crucial overall homeostasis, the actual choices depend mostly on how an individual subjectively perceives his or her life situation and what emotions shape or guide his or her choices. For example, a man, even in poor health, may opt for working more hours in office, instead of taking proper rest, if he perceives that he needs more money for better education of his kids. This leads us to this very important topic of how we all do risky behaviours, even when we are all wired to seek our overall homeostasis equilibrium.

We have explained earlier that you are in your perspective and your perspective is in you. This means, what and how an individual perceives his or her actual and real life situation can be very subjective. This hints at what we have earlier talked about loneliness. We are as lonely as we think we are. Similar is the realism with our perception about all things and life situations. This subjectivism of cognition is what we are talking about as we delve into this crucial subject as why people do loads of risky behaviour, which we see all around in contemporary clutter culture.

Scientists say, risky behaviour supports the hypothesis that a failure to adapt to losses or to attain an expected gain, to restore the homeostatic equilibrium induces risk seeking. Most kinds of risk seeking behaviours can be interpreted as a desire to return to an equilibrium level of wealth or any other parameter. This motivation is particularly strong when losses are involved. It is because sense of loss has more emotional impact than the sense of gain. This suggests, emotional inputs have larger subjective impact on perceptions and choices. Therefore, after a gain, many gamblers may take greater risks, guided by the emotion of larger gain. However, some gamblers may take a bigger risk, even when they lose, as they may be led by desperation to win at any cost. 

Scientists say, this aspect of the relationship between risks and the homeostatic equilibrium relates to behavior that has been dubbed risk homeostasis. This behavior implies that there is an optimum or equilibrium level of risk that people are generally comfortable with. If this is true, then efforts to decrease risk may be met by riskier behavior. For example, when highways are designed to be safer, drivers increase their speed and take more risks and the accident rate remain at previous levels when highways were not safer. So, the finality of all behaviors depends on subjective sense of perception of realism.

Scientists say, this interpretation is crucial to understanding the variety of and huge amount of risky behaviors that we all see around us in our modern living environment. All around us, there are people, of all age groups, taking far too many risks that seem quite contrary to the belief that people in general have this intuitive inclination to move back to homeostatic balance. But, it has to be understood that any cognitive factor of wellness is also subject to emotional interpretation. Like; income and wealth as a key cognitive factor for wellness is important but only up to a limit after which it rather has negative impact. But, what actually is the optimum level of income and wealth is a subjective and emotional decision, given also the fact that we all live in a modern environment where income and wealth disparities are huge. Only 5 percent of global population owns 95 percent of wealth. This contemporary clutter culture has loads of such chaos, conflict and confusion, which irrationally affect choices of behaviors.

In such an environment, decision-making is more tilted towards emotional rather than logical. Scientists confirm that this cognitive-conundrum is biological, part of our body-mind mechanism, which we have already stated. Science says, confusion and chaos makes one emotional in thinking and value-summation as limbic system is activated. So, emotions make the fine-line between optimum and maximum blurred. This prompts risky behavior, even though, the behavior is towards restoring the homeostatic equilibrium.

In modern environment, there is a sense of relative safety and stability. This also prompts people to take more risks in creating wellness. Then, people have their own levels of emotional value-summation. A person may react very deeply and heavily if divorced and start taking risky behaviors, another may move on. So, individual reaction to homeostasis requirements and allostatic corrections may vary.

Understanding the dynamics of homeostasis and its functional mechanisms give us great insight as we can understand our own internal design of things and external environmental factors that have the potential to disturb our balance and poise of life. Balance in modern environment is something so rare but this is what we all need to have. That’s why, understanding this poise in all aspects of life and living can help. It should.

This entire lengthy discussion on homeostasis was aimed at knowing and accepting the two core facts, which we have been talking in this book since the start. First scientific fact is �" the contemporary clutter culture is a dysfunctional and debilitating realism as it makes most of us land in chaos, conflict and confusion. This in turn lands us in a charged up emotional state affecting our logical and appropriate decision-making, as it blurs our perceptions about actualism of realism. This is what we talked about. The clutter culture affects our consciousness negatively and this in turn affects our cognition. Naturally, affected consciousness and illogical cognitions throws us in the deep oceans of bad and calamitous causality.

Second core fact emanates out of the first. That is; when the crucial 3Cs �" Consciousness, Cognition and Causality are hit by another 3Cs �" Chaos, Conflict and Confusion, we begin to lose the sense of appropriateness of self-awareness, self-control and self-actualization. That is why we begin to perceive some good and right things as bad and wrong and the vice-versa. This perception about the worth and utility of loneliness as some bad and wrong thing comes out of that situation, which most of us find ourselves deep into.

That is why, at the very start, we emphasized this need to stop, opt for this golden freedom of choice to pull out of the clutter culture and start to take the road to this calming, endowed and beneficial space of loneliness. This shall trigger off a very meaningfully empowering causality. Loneliness readies us to the attainment of our overall homeostasis, which in turn makes us have a very well-shaped and logical 3Cs of consciousness, cognition and causality. We shall then be having an empowered consciousness, life-living wellness and personal excellence. Let us welcome loneliness as a brilliant causality of overall wellness.

I think, as we have accepted the utility of this notion of causality of overall homeostasis with wellness, I invite you to another very important and beneficial causality between wellness, success in love and homeostasis. It promises to be very interesting and highly useful causality to unravel the worth and utility of loneliness. We deal with it in next chapter.

**

 

Like Love, Loneliness Is Also Potential

For Attaining Homeostatic Wellness

Sciences may not be in a position right now to tell us in perfect details as why and how, what happens in love. However, there are huge research-backed substantiations explaining lot many aspects of the purely physical and bio-chemical mechanisms and processes of love, as human mind handles them. This surely takes away lots of mysticism, magic and marvel out of the age-old notion of love and archetypal imagery of love in society. It is hugely helpful in clearing the mist of confusion and chaos around the very core idea of love.

The dualism of love, which causes confusion, is actually the root cause of why such a beautifully powerful and beneficial facility called love becomes a cause of pain and trouble. When we do not understand the mechanism of something very clearly, mysticism is bound to creep in and it shall unleash the destructive energy of confusion. We need to understand the mechanism of love in scientifically explained terms to enhance the joy of love.

The mechanism of mind, explained in terms of detailed neurochemical and neuroelectrical processes in pure scientific traditions may not be suitable for all of us. Therefore, what we shall talk about here is just an outline and simplified description of the mechanism. We are basically trying to weave causality between homeostasis and love. This we do to come to a very useful realization that homeostasis, or overall poise of life in general is at the very core of all things good and beautiful in our lives. If this poise is there, everything is joyous, if not; the same thing becomes a scary source of pain and regret.

What we are attempting to bring out from our discussion is the dualism inherent in the mechanism and processes of love, as human mind handles it. We also need to accept that it is not something which science is telling us now. Thousands of years back, great minds of spiritualism and philosophy have told similar facts about consciousness, the cardinal position of love in it and the dualism, which consciousness faces about the emotional positioning of love and other intangibles.

Human mind is where all mysticisms emanate and end. The multilayered mechanisms of mind is one huge mystery, humanity has been attempting to unravel since thousands of years. The spiritualism and philosophy have given its own interpretation. Science has taken over and presented great facts about mind mechanism, its structure and functions and this has led humanity to understand lot many things about consciousness. This facilitates other learning.

Human brain is the central mechanism for ensuring the survival and excellence of human body and it has to be accepted that the conscious and subconscious mind accepts and expresses almost everything in terms of its primary and pivotal role of ensuring a mechanism for survival and excellence. This interpretation of human mind looks quite demeaning as we all are inclined to accept ourselves as something big and a lofty; a special creation of God. Accepting ourselves as an entity, with base idea of survival is revolting. That is why, science says, ‘the idea of a self, in objecting terms is often pitted against the self itself, which we have been used to accepting subjectively since thousands of years.’

Just for knowing the mechanism, we need to accept that human mind ensures this survival and excellence through a continuous and complicated maintenance of a process called homeostasis �" better understandable as ‘poise’. We have already discussed homeostasis process and realism in details. All wisdoms, old or new, since thousands of years, have talked about the importance of this idea called ‘poise’, explained in terms of philosophy and spiritualism. Science unravels its physiological, bio-chemical and psychosomatic aspects.

In lower organisms, the homeostasis or poise is only physiological and biological but as human mechanism is very complex, human mind has to perform a complex and multidimensional homeostasis. In humans, the poise also has to be bio-sociological, psychological, emotional, environmental, spiritual as well as volitional. We are talking about this all because, love has to do specifically with this homeostasis thing and the trouble it creates also emanates from this.

There are sufficient scientific researches to establish that when people are in true love and absolute intimacy, their overall homeostasis is in great shape and this reflects in their healthy state of mind and body as well as behaviour-action. We are talking not only about intimate couple love but love in general. The reverse has also been established as researches show, when people are in instable and unsettled love elements, their body gets affected and they land in serious body-mind dysfunction and even death.

Science has also established that most of the behaviour-action of humans is instinctive and intuitive. Even the learned behaviour, the nurture part, in time becomes part of instinctive behaviour and nature. The simple idea is �" almost everything, which our conscious and subconscious mind accepts and expresses, has to be in consonance and conformity with the larger homeostasis, which is essential for survival and excellence.

The conscious as well as the subconscious minds operates in a way, which is mystical for most of us as most operations and processes are intangible and we are mostly oblivious of it. That is also why, love, which is a very potent, cardinal and critical element of behavioural and emotional expression of our consciousness, remains in the mist of mysticism, magic and marvel.

However, we all can now understand the mechanism of this mysticism of love consciousness and come out of the veil of mysticism, standing tall on the ground of practical and tangible realism. This we can do by understanding how essentially our larger consciousness is an intangible expression of homeostasis process and how love is the strongest and most authoritative voice of this consciousness; seeking perpetuity of poise  �" the larger homeostasis.

The process of making of consciousness, which stays with us lifelong starts even when we are in mother’s womb. The sense of self or to say, the question as ‘who I am’, starts to take shape when in womb, as the child gets the feel of sounds and vibrations around. The unconscious mind of child starts accepting these elements of his immediate milieu as part of its homeostasis requirements. Science admits; a newborn child is designed to be born as a genius. It readies itself for the environment outside the womb by imbibing the signals it receives inside the womb. That is why; modern couples start the education of their kids well in the womb itself. This itself was some knowledge, ancient people knew about!

From the day first, the human child is instinctively loaded with one facility, which helps him or her evolve his or her self �" the subjective consciousness. This facility is instinctive inquisitiveness �" the insatiable inclination to know. This desire also seems to be a beautiful expression of the homeostasis mechanism of body-mind consciousness. The mind can maintain poise only when it incessantly updates information about the surrounding environment and makes prompt decisions about the utility of the information for maintaining homeostasis.

It is here the trouble seems to start for humanity. The instinctive inquisitiveness, this wired curiosity about ambient milieus, the need to know as part of homeostasis mechanism, exposes the mind to loads of multiplicity of information in the larger environment. As subconscious mind of the child starts to accept and adopt most of them as essential for his homeostasis, he or she becomes unconsciously predisposed to these information and they become part of his or her larger consciousness, which science refers to as love/belief system. The best example of this predisposition of love/belief system is why most men and women would boast that their mothers cook this or that food the best. We are first exposed to our mothers and her choices. That is why what is our primary love/belief system is what our mothers gave to us.

Even before a child grows up to become an adult, he or she already accepts thousands of beliefs �" of his or her parents, family, peer groups, society, cultures and nation. However, most of these beliefs are based on his or her personal and subjective interpretations of experiences, inferences, assumptions, probabilities, deductions, inductions, and loads of oversimplifications, which the subconscious mind is expert at making. Most of these beliefs are very much part of the subconscious mind and continue to present themselves as potent referrals for conscious mind even years after. We all have heard people saying, an adult’s love is very much a reflection of what he or she got in childhood. We all know, a love-deficit childhood engenders an adult with troubled love life.

All these beliefs, which a child acquires, form part of the self, the subjective consciousness, about which we always keep asking question as ‘who I am’. Our subconscious mind starts building an image of self and this process expresses itself in mystically intangible ways. We unconsciously start extending the limits of our ‘self-image’ in things and beliefs around us. It starts with we identifying with our body first, then with our mind, our family, friends, neighbours, teachers, partners, the special someone and later with our career, assets, ethnicity, nationality, gender etc. 

As we grow in life, we identify more with ideas and issues. All these are expression of our self, the consciousness. That is why we said earlier that culture is a very strong influence on a person’s consciousness and as the contemporary clutter culture has exposed the young human minds with wrong cognitive and causality entities, our overall homeostatic equilibrium or wellness is now in jeopardy. All these realism we have come to know as scientists have begun to understand how brain works. If we read about brain mechanism, we shall find that human brain shapes in a way, which ensures that men and women learn most things between 12 to 25 years of age and it becomes very tough for them to unlearn something wrong or dysfunctional, which unconsciously becomes part of their learning.

We adopt the love/belief system in our minds and guard them very ferociously as if they were part of our self. We fight over our people and beliefs like we fight for our dear life and well-being. It is because, they are part of our self, our consciousness, our homeostatic equilibrium and anything against them threatens our homeostatic poise, our general sense of survival. This makes us react fiercely. This is mystical. We may think, we are fighting for the cause of our dear ones or dear beliefs but essentially, we are fighting for our own survival, which is expressed in terms of homeostasis.

We all know how people feel so strongly about their family, loved ones, ethnicity and nationality. People go to the extent of sacrificing their lives for the dear cause of family and even nation. It is very simple to understand why people do not think twice, giving up their lives for lovers and even something as vague as loss of their favourite football club or favourite celebrity icons. People commit suicide even when their favourite pop star falls from stairs and hurts him or her seriously. 

This is no joke. These incidents somehow are very intense and as some people accept it as something seriously threatening their self �" their very homeostasis wellness, they feel, their very survival is threatened. The reaction can be very disproportionate and precarious. They often are in love! As we said earlier, when we are in extreme emotions, our sense of poise and proportion gets confused and often, we act and behave in extremities. This we think as normal but are not as we lose the sense of appropriateness.

We all need to understand and accept it with a non-judgmental and objective mind that usually, when we are in love; we are in the mystical middle of a very intense and powerful dualism. True love is beautiful and everlasting poise of person and personality. However, in our pop culture, we all can see how love is one huge psychosis. The trouble is, both poise and psychosis can be simultaneously present and active in one single person, at any given time.

A person seeks to be in love to internalize this poise to the core of his or her personality. However, the same person is battling against the psychosis on the periphery of his or her personality as the culture and society we live in, exposes him or her to loads of conflicts and competitiveness. This dualism often expresses itself in chaotic love emotions.

When we love someone, he or she becomes an essential and ingrained part of our self-image and systemic wellness homeostasis. We start taking him or her for granted as part of me and mine. That is why; when there is trouble in love, or a situation, where it seems the love-situation is unsettled, we feel hugely threatened. We unconsciously feel that our very survival and core wellness is threatened. In this unsettled situation, the very person, who was once the receiver of all our love- largesse; poses as the one, who is a threat to our wellness.

We all have experienced and witnessed this situation all around us when a lover kills his or her beloved and also kills himself or herself. Why? This dualism plays the villain. The dualism of the subconscious mind makes us do all unimaginable things. The simple reason is �" when our love is threatened, our unconscious mind quickly attempts to identify the enemy, who threatened our survival instincts �" our homeostatic poise. As our beloved himself or herself is someone, who jolted our love-wellness, the unconscious mind identifies him or her as enemy. The war is then declared against this enemy. That is why scientists say the person, who is a source of connect, may be the most potent element of our loneliness.

The dualism is playing its mystical marvels to us. The special someone, the beloved, whom we love so much that we cannot think of living a moment without him or her, becomes our enemy number one. Depending on how we all have been culturally trained to treat our enemies, we start executing our battle-tactics against him or her. Those, who are well groomed, trained by parents and family to be accommodative and compassionate with even the enemies, shall never opt for violent and overtly physical battle-plans. However, they can be sadistic about them. Those, who have a culture of violence, can go to any limit as it is said, Everything is fair in love and war.

Global data shows that intimate partner violence is hugely on rise. Failed love and intimacy has become the chief pain-inflictor in our pop culture. Experts say, the easiest expression of the desire to inflict pain on intimate partners is promiscuity and character assassination. Sadism, aggression and behavioural hostility are sure signs of a troubled and unsettled wellness homeostasis of the person. This person shall be hugely intense and passionate in love. However, be sure, when things are on the low, such a person can be calamitous and extreme with expressions of his or her desire to secure his or her wellness. That is why it is said, true love needs not passion but compassion.

As we said earlier, researches have confirmed that when a person’s dear ideas or people are in trouble, his or her bio-sociological, psychological, emotional and volitional homeostasis is disturbed and this leads him or her to dysfunctional health and even death. The perception of threat to their homeostasis is very subjective, varying hugely.

That is why, we all need to understand and accept that love needs huge preparedness. We all are given enough time for the preparations. When I am perfectly settled and in absolute poise of my overall wellness homeostasis, then only I am ready for assimilation and integration of love. Moreover, the special someone, I love, has to be in this poise too. Then only the magic works! That is why it is always insisted, never ask whether someone is there and willing to accept your love. Rather always ask, whether I am there and ready for acceptance of love.

I share a true story with you. A young father, I have known, has his little daughter growing fast in a very big city of United States of America, where pop culture has taken the teenagers in perfect grip. The mother is very concerned and even tense. She worries for her teenage daughter and asks her husband, what to do to avoid any accidents. Nothing new! However, what the father of this teenage girl said to his wife is interesting. He said, ‘I am trying to figure out, what my daughter can do, which I cannot forgive. I love her and I think, the sky of my affection and compassion for her shall always remain much larger than her arms can stretch for possible wrongs.’

True love has to be like that. Love, in all its manifestations and expressions has to be like that. Love liberates, never suffocates. The compassion of forgiveness shall always remain larger than the accidents of passion, when you are in true love and absolute intimacy.

The father, in the above story, is in perfect poise of his wellness homeostasis. His wellness is not threatened by his subjective self-image of right and wrong. It is his poise, which is so beautifully and magnanimously reflected in his behaviour and action. It is only natural that this father is a sure hero for the girl and this girl shall grow to be one poised person.

From the day we are born, we are muffled by love, in one form or other. Our preparedness starts from that day. Initially, it is the responsibility of parents and family but later, we ourselves have to learn and unlearn our ways towards this poise of our larger wellness homeostasis. If we have this poise, love shall be one huge theatre of song and dance within. And, when we choose to extend this wellness poise to someone special, we need to be sure, he or she is in the same poise. 

Always remember, the wise of all times have insisted, true and lasting relationship is possible only between similar and generic elements. That is why we always have to ensure that the consciousness of this someone special is generic to our own consciousness.

Love, as an idea, deeply associated with the entity of homeostasis, is hugely beautiful and highly useful. Love is a mystical expression of the sense of larger wellness, which is a cardinal and potent condition for homeostasis.

What mind receives and expresses are through neurochemical and neuroelectrical processes. However, these processes are intangible and our conscious mind never is able to see or perceive them. It is when, these processes are translated in behaviour and action then we understand and accept it. That is simply why; there is a sense of mysticism, in all our behaviour-actions, which are expressed in subconscious state of mind.

The affectors of human emotions, which in turn impact the human mind’s decision-making choices of behaviour and action, are mostly intangible. That is why; there is a sense of mysticism and marvel around it. Love also being an expression of intangible nature and essentially a neurochemical and neuroelectrical expression of the larger need of body’s homeostasis wellness, lands in the domain of mysticism, magic and marvel.

Love is an intangible and very subjective expression of emotions in terms of behaviour-action to extend the domain of self’s homeostasis wellness in the ambient environment. When the self accepts and adopts something and someone as right and good for its homeostasis wellness, there is a neurochemical and neuroelectrical impulse to merge in as part of its larger ‘self’. This Process Is Body-Mind Consciousness Expressing In Terms Of The Emotion Of Love.

Love is essentially an extension of one’s self and subjective consciousness to accept and accommodate a thing, idea or person in its fold. Therefore, love basically is a very selfish and self-indulged emotion, an expression of the self’s ever-present need to maintain its homeostasis. It is our higher consciousness, which assigns and aligns this selfishness to lofty and noble values of life and living in societal space.

Love is a mind-mechanism and process on the side of self, for enhancement and aggrandizement of the broader need of survival and wellness. When we explain love in these terms, we shall see that there is nothing that remains in the veil of mysticism, magic and marvel. Everything, even weirdest of action-behaviour in love can be explained and understood in scientifically calculable ways.

A person’s homeostasis often accepts contradictory ideas. It is possible that a person is a devout faithful; still that person can relish an abusive tongue. It is all in the subconscious. It became ingrained in that person’s subconscious mind probably early in his childhood and now forms part of his or her larger wellness homeostasis. 

Therefore, this person would love another person, who has similar faith system, however, would not desist from using bad mouth to him or her as the subconscious mind is used to accepting the abusive tongue as good and acceptable. You may see a dualism and contradiction in it. You may think, if a person loves you, he or she should use nice language with you and should not be a boozer or a gambler. However, for that person, love is only an expression of his or her self and his or her self already accepts abuse and boozing as acceptable things for his or her wellness homeostasis.

If you attempt to reason it out with him or her that if he or she loves you, he or she should stop abuse and booze, he or she shall first of all look confused. He or she would not even understand why you are saying this. Because, he or she (his or her subconscious mind), does not see any contradiction and conflict in it. Most likely, he or she shall take your words of reasoning as a threat to his or her wellness homeostasis and would likely to go away. Nobody can compromise with his or her long preserved homeostasis.

Actually, this person loved you because you fitted in his or her larger scheme of homeostasis wellness. Now when you have put up ideas, which disturb his or her homeostasis, his or her sense of wellness is threatened and compromised. He or she is likely to stop loving you, or shall be unsettled and erratic in his or her action-behaviour.

The subconscious mind is almost too obsessed with the idea of survival and homeostasis. That is why, when it is faced with some situation, which is unpredictable and for which it has no ready solutions, it shall start creating such ideas for ensuring his or her win and success, which shall be weird and even illusory. Not only that, it would also prompt the conscious mind to go ahead with those weird ideas in terms of action and behaviour.

For example, when you ask someone you love deeply to do away with some nasty or not so good habit or idea with him or her. He or she would first resist it saying, ‘why do you want to change me?’ You may tell lot many things to convince him or her but with little success. Consider what this person’s subconscious mind can come up with. 

It can device a series of questions, which shall essentially be his or defence against the change you want. His or her subconscious mind shall create all possible patterns of action-behaviour to ensure he or she wins against your suggestion for change. Homeostasis needs to always win for survival.

The person would ask:

1. Why is there a need for me to change, I am doing perfectly fine!

2. Why should you ask me to change, can’t you accept me as I am?

3. Why should I change and even if I have, why should I listen to you?

4. Oh! Do you think you are God! Even God cannot ask me that!

5. Why should I change if I am not convinced there is something wrong about it?

6. If I have to change, only I shall decide, no one has the right to judge me.

7. I am open to change but only for someone who first accepts me as I am.

8. I would change only for someone who loves me blindly.

9. I accept changes but it would be tough as I was made this way.

10. Give me time, I am a not good at it! Etc.

The general refrain of most people in love is, “why cannot you accept me as I am. The God accepts me and loves me the way I am, good or bad. Why can’t you? Are you greater than God? Love never puts conditions!” Etc.

Remember, the more intelligent a person is, more artistic and ingenious shall be his or her advocacy against change. More unsettled, ephemeral and indecisive one’s overall homeostasis is, more intense and vocally demonstrative he or she shall be in love. However, it shall be tougher for you to change him or her and shall be equally demonstrative in denying changes.

This dualism needs to be understood. The unsettled homeostasis makes one to seek love more intensely, desperately and sincerely. Such love is usually highly demonstrative and aggressively centrifugal. Love is the emotion of search for larger wellness homeostasis and people, who have larger need for wellness poise, shall be very intense, highly possessive and overwhelming in love. This initially suits love needs of both the partners.

Everyone loves to be smothered and submerged in love’s intensity and its mystically disproportionate multidimensionality. However, this is the seed of big trouble-tree of love. If we wish to be swept away by the storm of love, we need also to be ready of the calamitous fallouts of this storm.

Love in its pure and pious form is never passionate but always compassionate. True love is a well-poised consciousness positioning, an innate state of settled internal wellness, and seldom in need of passionate and demonstrative expressions. Love’s expression is like systemic serenity of song and dance staged within a person’s consciousness. You shall come to relish and feel at peace with his or her innate song-dance positioning, without that person saying anything to you.

The higher consciousness, in compassionate possession of the settled wellness of love shall be calm and composed like a deep ocean and blue sky. Such a person shall be widely accommodative, assimilative and integrative towards everything, like an ocean and sky. Compassion only assimilates; passion can often drift in the storm of disproportionate demonstrations of love.

To sum up, what we talked about love and homeostasis is aimed at understanding how love, or for that matter all our intimate relationships are very much a function of very subjective consciousness, its diverged cognition and causality. 

Our relationships, which we all value so much is crucial for our wellness needs but they are expressions of the subjective consciousness and its subjective interpretation of homeostatic equilibrium. 

That is why; ultimately, what stands out as the most important thing is our own consciousness and its empowerment to hit the road to homeostatic poise. If we are in poise, if our consciousness has evolved to the stage of higher consciousness, where our cognition and causality is defined by our stabilized homeostatic equilibrium and wellness, we shall be in happy relationships and true love. Similar is the situation with solitude and loneliness.

That is why we have been insisting all along that all realism starts and end with you and realism within you. Nothing external to you has any meaning and utility to your wellness. All successes, all worth and utilities are engrained within you. Your own internalized poise is the primary success. All other successes follow that.

And for this success to happen, you have to evolve your higher consciousness. The contemporary clutter culture essentially disturbs your homeostatic equilibrium and that is why you shall be in very happy and beneficial space, if you avail the golden freedom to opt out of the clutter culture. This then opens the doors to the primary launch pad of overall wellness and personal excellence �" that is your loneliness. 

This loneliness is the primary stage, a launch pad to the ultimate positioning of your consciousness to attain kaivalya �" the onlyness.

**

 

Brainwaves Realism, Metacognitive Bliss

And Presupposition Of Loneliness

There is something about science, which makes so many people feel uncomfortable about it. No doubt, at times, when we are faced with so much of raw objectivity, served by many scientific perspectives, we think it is so very unromantic and rough edged. It happens especially when we talk about our own bodies and mind, as we are culturally trained to accept ourselves as something very subjectively, often with a romantically hypothetical ways, which gels well with our arcane sense of beauty and bliss. Science often is unemotionally objective.

That is why accepting ourselves as a system of neurons and chemicals is a bad imagery, not symmetrical to our romanticized imagery of the self. Science however accepts that we are essentially what our brain is and our brains are essentially a neuro-chemical mechanism. At the root of all our thoughts, emotions and behaviours is the communication between neurons within our brains. Brainwaves are produced by synchronised electrical pulses from masses of neurons communicating with each other.

This concept of brainwaves is very new and hugely helpful in understanding so many very crucial things about us, our lives and life realism. When we understand the brainwaves and use the notion in relation with loneliness issues, we shall see that how brilliantly it is unravelled to us that loneliness as a life-living choice lands us in a very beneficial state of our brain positioning, empowering us in so many ways.

You too may be already aware of brainwaves and therefore we are not going into details here about brainwaves but just focus about their role in our lives. It is just a straightforward acceptance that our brainwaves change according to what we’re doing and feeling. It is all about at which speed our brain neurons connect with each other, while doing different things. When slower brainwaves are dominant we can feel tired, slow, sluggish, or dreamy and the vice-versa. The higher frequencies are dominant when we feel wired, or hyper-alert.

 We have five brainwaves categories known as beta, alpha, theta, delta and gamma. It has to be accepted that at any point of time, whatever our brain is busy with, all five brainwaves are present but any one of the five may be dominant. The important idea is; science accepts brain as the cornerstone of our very existence and survival. It is very much the core identity of what we popularly accept as self or ‘I’. That is why it is a critical hypothesis that our brains have been designed by millions of years of evolution in such a way that it has everything, which are essential for our survival.

The brainwaves of all five types are also there in our brains for equitable use for different life-living situations, so that we have ease in doing well in all aspects and dimensions of our lives. However, when we are not aware of it, or we in contemporary clutter culture use only a part of the brain facilities, we are bound to land ourselves in troubles. We have already talked as how important it is for our wellness to hit the road to poise and equanimity. We have talked as how most of our life-living troubles in contemporary times are life-styles/choices problems, emanating out of our lasting failure to maintain this poise. Brainwaves concept also hints at the same.

The five brainwaves categories actually pertain to five key states of our life-living roles that we have to perform for our overall wellness. Naturally, our brain does it all and it has been designed for that. The life activities have a chain of works to do and all must be performed for our wellness. So, we are in our daily chores and the beta brainwave does the basic auto-mode action/behaviour roles. We relax and sleep then alpha and delta brainwaves are dominant. However, in our daily routine, we seldom process what in a day’s routine we have received in our brains. Every second loads of neurons are sharing information and we have little time and leisure to organize them. The brain does it when we are in sleep. In the light sleep stage as well as in REM dream stage sleep, theta brainwaves are dominant and it does the rumination and retrospection task for us. However, the most crucial is the gamma brainwaves, which are important for our wellness and is usually missing in our lives. We talk in detail about theta and gamma brain waves.

Science says, theta brainwave is the realm of our subconscious mind. A sense of deep spiritual connection and oneness with the Universe can be experienced when theta brainwave is dominant. Vivid visualizations, great inspiration, profound creativity, exceptional insight, subconscious creativity and intuitions, etc are associated with theta brainwave realm. When in theta brainwave, our senses are withdrawn from the external world and focused on signals and communication originating from within.

Gamma brainwaves are the fastest of brain waves and associated with lateral as well as vertical processing of information from different brain areas. In normal routine activities of beta brainwaves realm, brain processing is usually vertical with little emphasis on lateral thinking. Gamma brainwave passes information rapidly, and as gamma waves are the most subtle of the brainwave frequencies, the mind has to be quiet and in poise to access it. Researchers discovered only recently that gamma brain wave was highly active and dominant when we are in states of universal love, altruism, and the higher virtues. Gamma rhythms modulate perception and higher consciousness. Gamma is also above the frequency of neural firing. This means, it is not the usual role of the brain but an extra ordinary function. The presence of Gamma relates to expanded consciousness and spiritual emergence.

Now, given the description above of the two very important brainwaves �" theta and gamma, there is little doubt about two critical facts �" 

• First, so many crucial elements of our wellness, lasting happiness and true empowerments are lined up for us when we are in the brainwaves realm of theta and gamma. Or to say, dominance of theta and gamma brainwaves in our lives are crucial for our empowerment, life-living wellness and personal excellence.

• Secondly and most importantly, the incidence of both theta and gamma brainwaves in our lives have a precondition and that is �" calm, composure and poise. They presuppose a life choice in which we have to be away and aloof from the external world and focus on internal happenings.

In simple and clear terms, we can accept that our brain has all facilities for our wellness and happiness but there has to be a balance between external and internal attainments. We have been insisting on the poise within for pleasures outside. It is our mechanism, which requires us to have quality and positive lonely time for ourselves. Being lonely is a hugely beneficial facility, which our brain cherishes and values a lot. If we deprive this critical lonely time and space to our brain, we are annihilating our own homeostasis. When we disturb our poise, we face the calamitous consequences. The important thing is, we unlearn this populist belief that loneliness is detrimental for our wellness.

The brainwaves phenomenon has been outlined here just for our understanding that our body and mind need different situations for the brain to perform different roles. It is just a reminder of the fact as how very important the theta and gamma brainwaves are for us. That means, if we are in the fast-paced life, multitasking and always busy connecting to the clutter culture, we are essentially a single stream brain persons. We are not allowing our body and mind the leisure and composed state, where our brains could generate theta and gamma waves, which are so very important for very crucial functions of introspection, self-analysis, self-awareness and most importantly the critical connect of the self with the cosmos.

It is therefore very clear that quality loneliness and positive solitude are not optional for our wellness. Our body-mind mechanism has been designed in such a way that we need quality leisure time for an exclusive audience with ourselves. This we are ruthlessly denying to ourselves. That is why we have a mind consciousness, which is chaotic, conflicted and confused. We are only loading our brain with huge bulk of information on daily basis, in our beta brainwaves life-living state and not allowing the brain the serene and secluded time for the theta and gamma brainwaves to organize them, analyze them for higher purposes and synchronize them for our poised life-living wellness.

We all know that so many people are opting for meditation and healing holidays. It is a popular belief that meditation is good for wellness. However, many have wrong notions about meditation and its techniques. Meditation is in fact a simulation of sleep utilities for the brain state, which helps it land at theta and gamma brainwaves, as we do in our sleep. This then heals our chaotic mind consciousness. Scientists have researched into this aspect and have found meditation very powerful tool in theta and gamma brain waves onset. We shall talk in detail about this idea in the next chapter, when we shall look into the very critical issue of neuroplasticity.

Now, it is easy for us to link the notion of brain waves realism with benefit and utility of loneliness. The theta and gamma brainwaves, which are very recuperative and restorative mechanism of brains, are essentially functions, which the brain does when we are in different stages of sleep. However, science has accepted that good practitioners of meditation can attain the theta and gamma brainwaves realms, through sustained mediations. Science has also accepted that most people are having sleep deprivation and sleep disorders in modern fast paced lives. This somehow disturbs the auto-restorative/recuperative function of our brains. That is why it is always very good for most of us to have this calm and secluded exclusive audience with ourselves, so that we can attain this missing wellness mechanism in our lives.

Of the two brainwaves, the gamma brainwaves are hugely rewarding facility for us. Loneliness opens the door for us to enter the domain of gamma brainwaves and attain something, which is surely very gratifying feeling. The gamma brain waves land us in the august company of greats of the world �" those, who unravelled for us that all joys, all attainments are expressions of realism within. Science has now established the basis of this spiritual assertion by unravelling the brainwaves phenomenon.

Nothing outside our mind consciousness has any meaning for us. If we are not happy and poised within, even the best of things of material world, fail to make us smile and happy. There always has to be poise between external attainments and internal organization. This we have already talked about in homeostasis discussion. It is also easy to find connect between our emotions, hormonal homeostasis and brainwaves. It is easy to see why both tangibles and intangibles of life are equally important. Material wellness has to go along the emotional and mental wellness.

The poised mind has everything within �" the joys and satisfaction. The poised mind consciousness takes you to awareness beyond normal cognition. This is what scientists call metacognition �" that is, journeying beyond cognition. This is what we have been discussing all along in the book. The mind consciousness has the cognition, which is very subjective to our brain states. If we have a higher consciousness, we open the doors of different and novel domains of cognition, beyond the subjective cognition horizon. Metacognitive attainments are hugely satisfying and it lands us in a consciousness, where we are affected very little by outside excitations of the material culture. This happens as within us, the light has left no dark corners. The consciousness is lighted and all cognitions are bright and vivid in this light. We surely look beyond.

Science has researched this gamma brainwave state and its impact on human consciousness. Science says that gamma state is something above the usual mediation. Scientists say, sustained gamma-activity is not identical to meditation. They say, the simplest of the meditation practices is focused attention, or what is popularly known as mindfulness mode, where one concentrates on a single object; for example one’s breath. However, experiments conducted on long-term meditation experts, practicing a different type of meditation called open monitoring meditation, showed remarkable results. 

Open meditation is a more advanced meditation practice, where the emphasis is not to focus one’s attention on a singular thing, rather to use one’s brain to ‘monitor the universe of mental experience without directing attention to any one task’. This meditation mode exhibited much more gamma-synchrony than that of ordinary meditation practitioners. This is the state of high and lofty order of happy loneliness. This we need to understand.

This simple looking word called meditation is not easy. It needs a lot of practice to perfect the art and science of meditation to keep the brain states in the dominant gamma brainwaves realm. Dalai Lama says that meditating is hard work even for him as he has to meditate for four hours every day. Naturally, we can understand how crucial it is for normal people to have qualitative and positive loneliness time and space for attaining the benefits of the brain states, which lead us to wellness and happiness. The primary step of course is to accept loneliness as an endowment and start the journey.

**

 

Neuroplasticity And Optionlessess Of Goodness

And Wellness As Auto-Mode Virtue

Let me tell you a story. Twin boys were born to a couple. One of them was healthy and normal but another had congenital heart trouble. The doctors declared that the boy shall not survive long as his weak heart shall not allow him to see his third birthday.

The couple were strong and they decided to make everything count for the abnormal boy. They believed in their abilities and resolve. They took great care of this boy and made him live a life, which consciously consisted of all healthy efforts and practices. This abnormal boy had no choice as he did what his parents made him to. Destiny sure was changed as this boy lived for 80 long years, living within his limitations, but surely evolving everyday to attain in life what a normal person could.

However, his healthy brother, who was supposed to be normal and under no limitations, died at the age of 22. He was killed in a motorcycle accident, when trying to race it beyond reasonable limits. The couple believed this normal child was good enough to care for himself and therefore spared little attention for him. He was a mainstream person and lived a life even he didn’t choose for himself!

This is a metaphor of what plasticity is all about and how it writes its own beautiful script of life, which the decisive destiny makes no provision of. Neuroplasticity is a term, which has similar connotation, which we all must understand and accept as potent tool to override our destinies, adding all those beautifully endowed shades of life and living experiences, which destinies make little provision of.

Neoroplasticity is a term given to a mechanism, which is about physiological changes actually happenings in the brain, brought about by mind consciousness. It refers to changes in neural pathways and synapses owing to changes in behaviour, environment, neural processes, thinking, and emotions, as well as to changes resulting from bodily injury.

This is very real yet seems so magical and mystical. This shows how brilliant yet so complex and mesmerizing our body-mind mechanism is. What this magic is all about? The magic and marvel is about how the intangible elements of our life-living experiences become so powerful that they actually bring about tangible changes in the brain. The intangibles are behaviour, emotions, thinking, attitude, orientation, resolve, etc. These intangibles are about our personal choices of conscious mind, which we put in place in our lives for certain desirable destiny. And, our brain responds to that. Sure, this stupid called brain is wayward and likes to be in the comfort of inertia, if we choose to be in the drift of our subconscious minds. However, the same brain becomes our great facilitator friend, the moment our conscious mind takes control and invests rightly in the intangibles. This as we now know, is a process called neuroplasticity, which signifies that destinies can be changed and this happens by actual and physiological changes in our brains.

In contemporary world, especially the developed societies, people are growingly accepting the realism that mind is the centre of all realism. The realism, we think as something external to us, in our pop belief, designing our destinies is a huge misnomer. The reality is �" everything is engendered within us and we see only their images in the external world. What truly matters to us are not the tangibles but the intangibles. 

Life is about plasticity, destinies we all have and end up with are about plasticity. That is probably why we have our brains, which also has plasticity. The neurons do it for us.

 This leads us to the hypothesis we have been trying to work out in favour of loneliness. We cannot change things; we primarily cannot even know what needs to be changed. We cannot because, as science says, we buoy up and down in the vast ocean of sub-consciousness for most of our lives, only occasionally surfacing on the environment of consciousness. This happens to most of us and is surely aggrandized in those who live a life of drift and flux because of deep indulgence in the clutter culture, mad multitasking and instant self-gratification. We need to stop, keep away from this drift and think about self in a qualitative leisurely state of positive loneliness about what changes we need to bring in our lives for our wellness. We then have to consciously bring in those relevant intangibles in our mind consciousness, which can effect physiological changes in our brains. This shall institutionalize wellness and goodness in our lives.

Millions of people all over the world have been into this meditation. Meditation is nothing but a conscious choice of our minds, to physically keep away from those tangible elements in our external milieus, which are causing drift and flux in our lives. And then, with practice, meditative loneliness consciously brings about the intangibles into our mind consciousness. Gradually, as our brains build up new and facilitative neural pathways and synapses, we begin to feel the joys and satisfaction of the true wellness and happiness. The brain changes physiologically and gets aligned to the actual wellness and happiness.

The human mind, the functional mechanism of brain structures, has instinctive mechanism to universalize goodness as well as evil. What we feed in it is not its concern. This is the role of intellect. The intellect is the intangible faculty to be in control of the instinctive as well as the culturally learnt behaviours, to objectively assess all life-living choices with holistic logic.

The universe has not put us where we are today with any specific purpose of designed goodness. We have to design our purpose. As we repeat this objective mind training to our brain, the objective goodness would spread all throughout its neural circuitry. The notion of neuroplasticity says that brain can actually create new pathways to institutionalize this objective goodness. And then, we won’t have to think twice to perform goodness, as it would then become an instinct, and thus an involuntary mechanism, like a hand moving away involuntarily as it touches fire.

It has to be understood and accepted with all humility and compassion that a real good human is not one who needs to think and then behave and act good. Rather, it is one who does not have to think, as all his behaviours and actions are instinctively bound to be good. We don’t consciously remember when we drive a car or cook a meal as it is instinctive, even when they were once learned behaviours. Objective goodness is also learned behaviour. But when we repeatedly practice it, it becomes instinctive.

Neuroplasticity is also about this objective intellect. It is about consciously aligning with desirable intangibles of life and then practice them with mindfulness of higher consciousness, helped by meditation. This then becomes structured in our brains. This means, goodness and wellness is no more our choice, but it has become an auto-mode virtue, an optionless absoluteness for us.

That is why we have been insisting that loneliness is a positive state of being as it creates a space for mindfulness and option-building towards the ultimate optionlessess of goodness and wellness.

**

 

Creating A Personalized Spiritual Model

For Lasting Connect With Happy Milieus

Thank you so much for patiently being with me all along. Now we are into the conclusive part of the book and surely, we are going to talk about the very crucial idea of Happiness of Loneliness. This comes after we have already talked in detail about the high utility of the true notions about loneliness. We shall now talk about how we can use this beautifully awarding facility of loneliness for our true happiness.

However, before we do that, I humbly request you to wait a bit and allow me to say you something very crucial, as a summing up exercise, in the next few paragraphs, so that we could then finally come down to the concluding part of Happiness of Loneliness.

Old and very trusted ancient wisdom has a prescription, which has transcendental utility. We all shall be better off, if we accept that. This surely helps us hitting the homeostatic poise in our lives, especially in contemporary clutter culture. 

Ancient Indian wisdom said, first and ultimate wisdom is acceptance of the mortality �" not only of life, self, but all things around and beyond us. This emotion of acceptance of mortality renders a self, a consciousness, which naturally aligns with all things, intangible, soft and immortal. This consciousness then evolves itself towards spiritualism, which is a staple for consciousness. We need to understand mortality wisdom in its holism. Kindly spare some precious time and loads of positivity for getting to the core of the idea as how acceptance of mortality stands as core and cardinal element of true spiritualism.

Our ancestors, around 3000 years back, had little distractions of modern and contemporary life, even though they had evolved to a stage of civilization, where life-living had become manageably comfortable. As population pressure on natural resources was very little and needs of life were few, they had loads of quality leisure time �" which we must accept as Spiritual Loneliness. The poise they had within and as they accepted the utility of this precious Spiritual Loneliness, this led them to be keen observers of every little thing around. 

They could decipher a design, a pattern in almost everything that happened or presented themselves to them. Humans have the most developed facility of mind consciousness for observance and imagination. These two innate facilities made our ancestors decipher so many patterns in the nature around them, in their lives and even in the universe, they could visualize. They started to put these patterns �" both tangible and intangible, into actionable ideas. It is also very natural and we all even today do the same. Those were days, when our ancestors only had the human tools of observations and imaginations as means of corroboration. 

However, they had the genius to engender such ideas, which were self-evident and self-corroborative in their immediate milieus. They beautifully picked up symbols and metaphors from nature to elaborate and substantiate their ideas. They are part of philosophic and spiritual traditions but actually, they also happen to be the crude resource for scientific enquiry and substantiation. The core philosophy is based not on ideas, which modern contemporary world can label as pure imagination of idle and primitive minds. They can be and should ideally be accepted as observations of realisms, present in the cosmic mechanism and in the microcosm of human lives and their social living by people, who had the most receptive mind consciousness. That is why the core philosophy seems so self-evident and self-corroborative. The core idea emanates out of a realism, which is finality even today and shall always remain the ultimate finality. This finality is mortality.

We need to put aside or unlearn our contemporary populist consciousness, which is so used to popular modern ideas and benchmarks. It is a popular way of thinking that death is the end. Our worthy ancestors accepted it as the beginning of life. We too are just accepting the basic premise here as one final truth and that is why the inevitable has to be accepted as the beginning of all ideas of life.

When the hypothesis is right, the idea has better chances of being right. The core Indian philosophy starts with finality as the initiation of all ideas of life. That is why it is self-evident and self-corroborative. Our worthy ancestors could decipher that even in the definitive and inevitable pattern of mortality; there was overall continuity and immortality, which permeated in the milieus around them. They could decipher that in nature, there were elements, which remained continuous and immortal in totality, even while part of it decayed in cyclic mechanism.

This masterly observation was made available to the genius of imagination and it could be unravelled to them that every life on earth too has core elements, which are continuous and immortal, even when part of it decays in time. This core observation engendered the idea of two distinct but simultaneous elements of the cosmic realism �" 

• The mortal and discontinuous,

• The immortal and continuous.

They also discovered that within human life too, the same twin elements existed. The body was mortal and aligned to discontinuous cosmic elements but the elemental consciousness deep within was immortal and aligned with continuous elements. The subjective feeling of me, the self as distinct and different from other human being was just a virtual bridge between the twin realisms of mortality and immortality. This subjective consciousness Einstein called optical delusion.

This core idea became the cornerstone of a philosophy, which is enshrined in the cardinal Indian spiritual system. The yoga philosophy also adheres to this core idea. Yoga in ancient Indian language of Sanskrit means union of the immortal elements within a human being with the cosmic elements of immortality. Yoga is a process of attaining the union of jeevatma (the microcosmic consciousness of living beings) with parmatma (the ultimate macrocosmic consciousness of cosmos). This core idea also led to a belief-system, which decided the ultimate utility and purpose of all lives. Yogic philosophy presents a self-evident and self-corroborative idea of why and what is the true way of living one’s life.

The core idea was tested empirically in the social milieu. The best laboratory to test and validate any idea empirically is the human body-mind mechanism itself. The patterns of human action and behaviour corroborated the idea and they finally became a social practice and part of the larger culture of that time. 

The culture this core idea evolved, accepted that in life, everyone is naturally inclined to maximize joys and minimize pains. It was accepted that self-welfare is the cardinal goal of life for every living being and this is attainable through self-interface or self-dialogue (aatma-sakchhatkar). The wise of our civilization empirically observed that living beings are in constant and causative relationship with elements of nature. This nature also exists in microcosmic form within living beings. In nature, there are both mortal and immortal elements. They observed that mortal elements are usually expressed in tangible matter and immortal ones in intangible form. They deciphered that human being could attain their lasting and continuous wellness only when they establish a relationship with immortal and intangible elements of nature and life. 

The philosophy they engendered says �" 

True and lasting relationship can happen only between similar and generic elements.

This is the idea, yogic philosophy practices in totality and perfection. Yogic philosophy maintains that even the matter shall finally lead to a-matter, tangible shall lead to intangible and mortal elements shall lead to immortal elements. This is because, empirically, true and lasting relationship can happen only between similar and generic elements. The five senses of body mechanism shall initially orient a person to consumption and gratification. However, the same five senses automatically and finally leads to the realization that these consumptions and gratifications are ephemeral and mortal. This is self-evident and self-corroborative as every human knows that mortality is inevitable and the ultimate realism. 

Yogic philosophy admits it as self-evident for all that all pleasures of body and all joys of gratifications have the inbuilt and inherent energy advocating against it. The energies of attachments and gratifications are entwined with the inverse energies of detachment and renunciation. That is why, within a human being, the desire and will to have a life of absolute detachment and renunciation is as powerful as the desire and will for a life of attachment and gratification. This dualism is instinctive but unravelled only by a higher consciousness.

This idea is crucial in understanding and accepting as why people in contemporary culture of instant self gratification, overdrive of consumption and multitasking for more material attainments are growingly feeling the ultimate emotions of loneliness. They fail to accept the dualism, which our consciousness engenders for us. More we align ourselves with tangible and mortal elements of life and living, more reverse emotions we shall experience towards intangible and immortal elements. Loneliness needs to be accepted as a function of this dualism of our mind consciousness. Once we accept the above notion of mortality and the dualism it creates for us, we shall come out of the dualism and loneliness shall become an empowering thing for us.

The philosophy, which enshrines the ideals of purpose of life as attainment of perpetuity of wellness, therefore extends this empirically self-evident and self-corroborative fact. It says that every human being should consciously opt for a relationship with only the intangibly expressed continuous and immortal elements of nature, both within the nature of the body-mind consciousness as well as the nature outside in physically and tangibly expressed domain. It says that anyone can decipher the practical realism that the flow of energy of gratification is also joyous but it ends up in the finality of pain and emptiness. Whereas, the energy flow of detached consciousness keeps augmenting like a flame in the fireplace, which is self-energized by constant offering of renounced elements of consciousness.

We can here see very clearly that spiritualism must not be confused with religion, divinity or god. Spiritualism has a very simple, very secular and purely earthy definition. Modern scientists and consciousness researchers say that there is an intuitive perception in all of us that we are part of a universe that is a unified whole. This idea is central to the thought of we all. We all have this innate need to see and find ourselves in unity and harmony of the milieus around us, from our ambient social milieus to the extreme of the cosmos. Everything tangible and intangible about this natural emotion is derived from archetypal images framed in our minds since childhood and even before. Scientists say, it is now part of our neural wiring, our genetic makeup. Feeling in unity with surroundings is natural and this personally evolved emotion of association and related emotions of ideational belonging is what defines spiritualism. That is why spiritualism is always a very exclusively individual and never a collective identity or entity.

From the very definition of loneliness in contemporary societies, we can see that it is essentially an outcome of our failure to feel connected with our surroundings and everything small to big in ambient milieus, which in turn causes loneliness. The crucial mind-connect to find ourselves in unity and harmony of the milieus around us is missing. That disconnect, gap or void is causing the emotion of loneliness, especially in women. 

Women in all cultures are more prone to loneliness emotions as this trouble of being connected is more innate in them. Science confirms that men have seven times more grey matter in their brains compared to women but women have nine times more white matter in their brains than men. This white matter is the connecting neurons. Both sides of woman’s brain are equally active, compared to predominant right part in men. That is why women always feel the need to stay connected, feel part of and in harmony with all elements in their ambient milieu, especially the intangibles. This is hugely missing. Clutter culture offers loads of tangible connects but the much valuable intangible connects are hugely missing. Why?

The feeling of disconnect and isolation is a corollary of the dualism, which we have discussed earlier. In contemporary clutter culture, we connect a lot, we try to align ourselves with everything but not with elements, which are real and simple. We live in a world, where most things are growingly becoming fake. We live in a world of high distrust. We connect with loads of things, which are only virtual, not real. Our brain is not designed to have connect with things, which has low emotional inputs. We live in a world, which is growingly becoming so big, so complex and so fake that it stands as something perceptibly impersonal. However, we have this innate need to personalize things. We are personalizing too much but deep inside our subconscious minds, we know and accept that all those things we are personalizing, are too low on intangibles �" trust, emotional intimacy and actualism. Fake realism cannot give us this wellness of connect and assimilation. Loneliness is bound to prosper.

That is why it has to be emphasized here that we all need to reassess this connect we have. We need to be spiritual in a very different sense to re-find this lost connect. We have to unlearn the popular worldview about spiritualism. We need to accept spiritualism in sync with contemporary scientific mindset. This new Spiritual You has absolute freedom to formulate new questions about the popular worldview. The neo-spiritualism shall help you reposition, redesign and realign the old populist realism about spiritualism. This lost connect shall then be redeemed.

All new questions must lead to new answers, which ensure larger wellness and excellence of self, not as some individualistic, self-indulgent and self-gratifying entity, rather as an essential part of the larger global society. The collective wellness and excellence is one singular condition, which ensures wellness and excellence of all individuals.

The new spiritual you shall understand the basic mechanism of life-living realisms. Thousands of years back, religion and philosophy also provided us models and metaphors to understand the cosmic model as well as life-living realisms. However, they regressed to doubtful utility, because like all good ideals, they too became victim to human ingenuity and conveniences. Moreover, they could not update their models with changing times.

Science also provides models but ideal it is for the new spiritual you to opt a holistic, assimilative and integrative model, which accepts and combines all good and cherished ideals and models of all wisdoms �" old or new. This shall be an ideal contemporary positioning for the neo spiritualist.

This new spiritualism should work out towards larger wellness of individual, society as well as larger worldview. Moreover, it should endow us with a thought-behaviour-action platform, which optimizes all processes of humanity and this world, enabling our potentials to reach a new high in peaceful coexistence.

Let us translate this holistic-assimilative-integrative model of new spiritualism in six core domains of life and living �" Self, Family, Work, Society, World and Beyond Life. Each one of us can have our own subjective and personalized model of spiritualism. However, these models must ideally conform to and be in perfect symmetry with the holistic-assimilative-integrative model of new spiritualism, which is in sync with contemporary common sense.

When you design and evolve your own personalized and subjective spiritualism model, the core ideas of overall wellness and excellence must be retained and adhered to. The choices and priorities can be subjective and all the operative ideas, thoughts, behaviours and action can be designed suiting to personal requirements. However, the following notions must be part of any model we create: -

1. The core principle must always be holism, assimilation and integration of all wisdoms and knowledge of humanity and never ever reject anything out-rightly. There is always some utility in even the seemingly worst of futility. Always remember, one does not necessarily have to be wrong for another to be right. Coexistence is always better.

2. We have a mechanism and this body-mind mechanism must always be in perpetuity of poise and overall homeostasis. Your spiritual model must ensure bio-sociological, psychological, emotional, spiritual as well as volitional homeostasis.

3. The body-mind homeostasis or poise is largely a function of internal emotional stability, poise and positivity. Internal emotions are deeply affected by elements from our external environment, especially the ambient societal milieu. To minimize external disturbances to internal emotions, one must accept love, absolute intimacy and compassion as core elements of the spiritual model. This necessitates action-behavior benchmarks of nondiscrimination, tolerance and nonaggression, moderation and non-self-gratification as well as perpetuation of pursuits for knowledge and wisdom.

4. The higher consciousness is the ultimate personality positioning and to attain that, even spiritualism is only a transitional situation. This stage is reached with a receptive-mode consciousness, breaking free from the auto-mode reactive consciousness. The spiritualism model must work out for a life and living schedule, which allows quality lonely time for self and family.

5. Most importantly; if we see the larger picture and accept facts objectively, with whatever knowledge humanity has so far evolved and understood, we shall have to accept that all life on earth, including humans and its evolution is one huge random and multi-dimensional event-cyclicality. On the other hand, what we humans make out of it and charter our own ways for survival, purpose and excellence is another multi-dimensional cyclicality. Both forces, though inter-dependent only at the core and having some patterns, which can be replicable, still, they remain highly and intricately randomized. The element of unpredictability, inadvertence, accidentality and asymmetricality in both largely sovereign forces of the cosmos only ensures that humanity can never ever remain in perpetuity of singular purpose, peace and order. Especially in contemporary situation, when humanity long before evolved and acquired the criticality of conscious intelligence, which is bound to lead it to ever-growing entropy (degrading randomization) and ultimate extinction in the long run. Finding a purpose and purity of singular pattern or model of culture and virtuosity for global community seems out of question. The mechanism of cosmic realism never ever seems to allow it. It is more impossible now. The wise can only understand that and find its personalized and subjective peace. Anyone, who arrives at the higher consciousness of higher objectivity, can clearly unravel this mystery. That is why; spiritualism also needs to be very personalized and subjective. You have the genius in you and you can do it.

**

 

Celebration Of Success Of Self-Control

And Happiness Of Loneliness

As I am about to begin the last chapter of the book and talk about happiness of loneliness, I am very optimistic about one eventuality. I very humbly believe that you have connected to me and my words in good trust and goodwill. This is important as what I need to say here now has utility and worth only when you accept them as. The words in the next few paragraphs are very personal and are about what I have internalized. I need your faith in them.

We have already shared before that if the hypothesis is right; the idea is accepted as right. If two people have an assimilative and integrative attitude, one can easily see that words travel well between them and meanings have larger and deeper utility. There is an unusual magnanimity of reception. Friendship is one positioning, where assimilation and integration about divergent hypotheses has larger accommodative space. A seed is more objectively accommodative in space than a grown up tree. Friendship is seed positioning. 

That is why, I very affectionately request you to be my friend and accept the words below as one long conversation between friends. This, I am confident, shall engender smoothness of navigation and fruition of the entire exercise.

It is a heart-felt realization that our very worthy ancestors as well as many before me have already said almost all good things. What I can do is present them in new set of words with novelty of references. The only justification of me telling them is that all goodness and wellness ideas and words need to be repeated and retold, to add to their all-pervasiveness. 

At the age of 48, I can say with innocence that getting old is such a beautiful and satisfying experience. It makes the self accept the utility and fruition of holistic, assimilative and integrative consciousness. Getting old has probably pushed me close to the eligibility of perhaps beginning to understand what essentially is there to be understood!

The wise have said, wisdom is what we internalize. I humbly say that what I share with you here is what I have internalized in my life. I believe you to believe me that all my previous 25 books have been humbly intended to be only this affectionate and compassionate sharing with you, what I have internalized.

Acceptance is the most difficult attainment in life. Luckily, it is an internalized process. We are not dependent on anybody or anything outside us to have this attainment of acceptance. The primary, the unequivocal and undeniable truth of life and living is loneliness. All of us come into this mortal world alone and have to go alone. This optionlessnes is some acceptance, hardest for we all. But then, there is no escape from the truth and realism. That is why the wise of all ages have insisted that mortality is our primary and ultimate wisdom, with which we need to live happily.

What essentially is happiness? This question comes first as we are talking about happiness of loneliness. There surely cannot be a singular definition. Happiness is not an objective, tangible, measurable entity. We cannot have an index system for that. However, after so much knowledge about our body-mind mechanism, we now know so much about what factors are associated with this very wide range of emotions called happiness. We surely know so much about consciousness, homeostasis and brain mechanism. This knowledge makes us stand in good stead in designing our happiness package. The artistry of happiness is in acceptance �" acceptance of hardcore and objective realism and truth about life and living. 

We all wish to be happy. We all are designed to be happy. But, happiness is not a static entity. There is a systematic cyclicality of consciousness, cognition and causality, which never allows happiness (even grief) to remain static and fixed. Our body-mind mechanism is designed in such a way and the external milieus too work in a way that happiness for us stands as a synthetic realism �" this means, it is always evolving and changing in thesis-antithesis-synthesis cyclicality. That means, happiness is a dynamic, evolving entity and we have to be very endowed and prepared to be in control of most of the factors and elements, which synthesize happiness in time and space dimensions. This itself presupposes that we are in acceptance mode, in happy reception of the truths, objective realism and ephemeral nature of most realism about life and ourselves.

There are some critical truths about life-living and our own body-mind mechanism, which we need to be in absolute reception of acceptance. This is option-less. These acceptances are unavoidable for lasting happiness. Being in the flux and drift, or wilful denial of these truths shall always have calamitous impact on our wellness as well as happiness.

The primary acceptance is mortality. We have already talked about how acceptance of mortality opens the doors of empowerment for us, which in turn translates into life-living wellness and personal excellence. Another very important acceptance is the unpleasant truth that evolution has not designed us and bestowed us with any higher purpose of life. It was a stupid engineering, an accidental or randomized chain of mutations, which were aimed not at excellence of the species but bare survival. Therefore, another very critical acceptance is that all of us have to individually design and devise our own higher purpose of life, which augments our wellness, happiness and excellence.

Evolution needs to be accepted as it facilitates a very crucial learning for our wellness. Evolution science accepts that DNA is the foundation of all lives, including humans. This DNA mutates naturally in its course of replication, which is essential for survival and continuation of life. The mutations are option-less as changes in external milieus need suitable changes in DNA and therefore, mutations are a function of adjustment to outer or external milieus. This realism is the most beautiful and most primary metaphor of how life and its overall wellness are all about adjustments. We have talked above about happiness and wellness being a synthetic realism. This means, life and its wellness is not static but dynamic and necessitates masterly adjustments for lasting wellness and happiness.

Moreover, evolution also offers a great metaphor of how self-control is the critical attainment in life. Science accepts that mutations are not only natural and option-less but also randomized. The mutations are not aimed at excellence but bare survival. This extends to us a metaphor of self-control. We surely cannot afford to be as random as evolution’s mechanism of DNA mutations. We need great self-control to ensure that mutations in our lives may be an adjustment to changes in external milieus but these changes we accept in our lives has to be optimally controlled, if not perfectly controlled; and never randomized. Our life-living choices cannot be controlled exclusively by external elements in milieus. As scientists say, we are past the stage of stupid engineering of evolution. We are now very endowed and empowered. All future mutations, in human lives or in the world we live shall be controlled well by us. Self-control defines the modern humanity, not randomized and erratic causality. We shall do all the best possible masterly adjustments with empowered self-control.

Another important acceptance is about the overall futility of pop shades of cultures in our contemporary lives. It is said, ‘every healthy kid born is a veritable genius of the cosmos but it takes 25 years for the society and popular cultures to turn him or her into a stupid’. This is just a hint at the fact that societies and cultures of contemporary times have become a storehouse of choicest hypocrisies and they have calamitous impact on a person’s wellness, happiness and excellence.

We do not need to go into details of this issue. What we have to accept is �" everyone is born with certain specialities as well as few disadvantages. Ancient Indian tradition said that all people are born with one of the three broad consciousnesses. Modern science classifies all people of the world under seven memes or shades of consciousnesses. The primary acceptance about consciousness is �" one’s true purpose of life and living and one’s lasting wellness and happiness is in doing such things in life, for which his or her consciousness is naturally aligned to. We have already talked about how subjective consciousness defines and decides one’s cognition and this subjective cognition in turn shapes up his or her causalities of life and living. We have also talked as how higher consciousness is powerful enough to change this innate mind consciousness and instil a higher purpose in life.

Modern science has done a lot of researches into types of people, based on their consciousnesses, body constitutions and brain types. Contemporary science classifies all people of the world into 16 brain types. These brain types are genetic groupings, which signify that each brain type has specific innate and born mental as well as physical skills. Each brain type has inherent body-mind proficiencies as well as deficiencies, which largely decide what a person can do well in life and what not. 

These brain types are somehow a practical guide to know from early age as what a person can do best in his life and what pursuits can fetch him or her best set of wellness and happiness gains. Scientists say, the brain type decides almost everything one does; academics, economic activities, careers, relationships, parenting, expressions and communications, sports and leisure, spirituality, etc. We are not going into details of all these scientific findings. What we wish to say is �" we live in an age, where we have growing pool of critical information about life, living as well as our own mechanism. Acceptance of these information is surely going to help us in designing and shaping our lives and living in such a way, which suits our subjective individual consciousness. The simple acceptance is �" if we are true to our consciousness, we are close to our homeostatic equilibrium. This helps us attain poised cognition and causality. This in turn helps us remain in lasting wellness and happiness.

This realism needs to be internalized. The difference can only be realized, not known by just reading about it. Each one of us is different within, even while we all look almost the same from outside. The real and true endowments are all within �" in our consciousnesses and we have to accept with holistic reception that consciousness has a structure and function, which are all within, in our brains. Our consciousness, which is an intangible entity, aligns naturally with intangibles in external as well as internal milieus. 

That is why it is crucial to first accept as of what consciousness type we are. Then, as per his or her consciousness, he or she must design or re-design his or her life-living choices. All life choices and personality choices need to be aligned and generic to one’s special shade or type of consciousness. This alone can be the right recipe of lasting wellness and happiness. Often, we align with elements in our milieus, which are opposite and antagonistic to our consciousnesses. Often, we align (have relationships) with people, who are in different shades of consciousnesses, which may be opposite or badly competitive to our own consciousness. This is primary cause of chaos, conflicts and confusion in our lives. This is definitive design of disaster for most of us. We have to be self-aware of choices.

Now, the most important aspect of consciousness needs to be accepted. This acceptance is the golden wisdom, which we all need to internalize. This acceptance is the core and cardinal hypothesis of the idea of happiness of loneliness.

Science is always very helpful, if we remain warned of its populist extrapolations. Scientific research has established that a normal grown up brain is only 15 percent genetic; remaining 85 percent is environmental. This means, we are born with a brain structure, which evolves and shapes as we mature. It is the elements in our ambient cultural and physical milieus, which form the majority part of our brains.

We have already talked about how many of us feel that average healthy kid is born with a genius brain and the cultural elements turn him into a stupid. What this stupidity is all about. This stupidity is chaos, conflicts and confusion, which cultures and other milieus loads on our minds as we grow and mature. This stupidity is the prime source of the most calamitous disease of humanity called hypocrisy.

This is the point, we have to accept and work our ways with. Human kids have long maturity periods and for long years, they are dependent on parents, families and society for their life-living decisions. Science says, a human brain matures fully at the age of 25 years. It goes through a long process of development, altered by learning and unlearning. For this long period of maturity, the values, ethics, life-living choices etc are all directly or indirectly decided or influenced by others’ brains, very seldom our exclusive brains. This means, there are loads of learning, which we unconsciously or subconsciously imbibe into our mind consciousness. Many of these elements and factors, which become part of our consciousness is not what our brain types may be. This surely is a conflict situation.

What we need, when we attain an age of 18 and above, is quality leisure time for retrospection and rumination. If we keep pace with the drift and flux of external cultures and milieus, we can never ascertain, what is causing split and conflict in our consciousness. As we accept the utility and fruition of positive loneliness, a conscious choice of functional solitude, we are in an empowered space of life. We can then ruminate. We can then have an exclusive dialogue with self and ask key questions about appropriateness of so many elements in our consciousness. We can then check out the utility of those elements, which are either causing conflicts or lying untapped within. We can then finally redesign and reshape our consciousness by pruning things from our life-living choices, which are detrimental to our overall homeostatic equilibrium.

The true and lasting happiness has a sure and settled mechanism. We need to be in good homeostatic poise to be in true and lasting happiness. Not only that; our consciousness must be empowered enough  for we to have the self-control and self-discipline to adjust our actions and behaviours to keep returning to the set point of homeostatic equilibrium. Self-indulgence or elements in external milieus may occasionally disturb the poise in our lives but we must always have this self-control to hit back to the set point of poise.

Loneliness is happy situation because this facility extends us the golden opportunity to have enough personalized latitude for manoeuvring our best resources to keep maintaining poise in life. The happiness of loneliness is in being the master of your life and cease to be a slave of external elements. The happiness of loneliness is in the feeling of empowerment, which ensures that your life-living choices are shaped, coloured and designed not by anything external to you, but by the internalized elements, your higher consciousness is in perfect control of.

What is the thrill and ultimate joy of life-living experiences? Different people may describe it differently. Most however may not, as there is little conscious awareness in most things we all do in our action-reaction auto-mode behaviour. Still, many may admit that the biggest thrill and ecstasy in life is this very intangible emotion of being in perfect control of things.

A best-paid soccer star once said about one of his favourite goals. He said he enjoyed it more than sex with his girlfriend. How can we explain that? Can kicking a stupid ball in a wide net be a joy more intense and satisfying than sex, that too with your beloved? It definitely looked so. Most of us have seen how the goal-makers in intense soccer matches throw themselves into wild exhilaration and boisterous celebrations after a goal! Surely, not many get such a huge kick in sex to behave uprooted like that! 

The simple fact is, soccer is a tough game and things are always so uncontrollably on the move and drift. Like life, a soccer game has so many randomized potentials, which may land either way, in quick turn of time and space. Landing a goal is very tough as it needs so many elements in combination getting right. Still, the ultimate and most crucial punch is the very critically timed and most controlled execution of the push or slide by the goal-maker. The goal-maker knows it deep within his subconscious mind that a goal is usually the outcome of a very self-controlled execution in last seconds of a long build-up. The mad celebration is of the ecstasy and thrill of the self-control �" the self-control of not only the individual goal-maker but also the entire team members, who build up a possibility with skilled conscious self control.

Life is also very tough like a highly intense game of soccer. The chances of success in life are as tough and rare as a goal in soccer. The potentials are also quite randomized. The real happiness, thrill and celebration in life is also about successes. Success, like landing a goal, is very tough as it needs so many elements in combination getting right, at one point of time and space. We also know it very well that like a goal, success is usually the outcome of a very self-controlled, high precision execution of some very personalized elements, after of a long and tiring build-up. In celebrating successes, we all actually celebrate the intangible element of meticulous control and precision of personal or group actions and behaviours.

Therefore, the simple fact is �" when we derive so much thrill and ecstasy in being in control of so many external factors, how happy we shall feel, when we are in perfect control of our own inner self and consciousness. If control over external factors and elements of milieus can be called success, isn’t it that the same control over internal and intangible elements should be considered larger and better success!

However, this does not happen in our lives. We seldom consider the inner success as real thrill and happiness. This is pop cultural influences in our consciousnesses, which we have to unlearn. This is crucial unlearning as this very insistence on celebrating only external successes and not the internal ones has caused so many troubles in the contemporary cultures. This is the dysfunctional worldview of contemporary celebrity culture. 

If winning and losing is a brutal function of just a stupid kick of the ball, into the wide net, then it translates into trouble for humanity. If successes and celebrations of sports are confined only to the incidence of goals, then this success is not only very scarce, but also divides humanity into two classes �" one who celebrates and another who feels depressed and uncelebrated. The true and real celebration is sports, the rhythm and excellence of the sportsmanship. The true and real success is that of the spirit of intangibles of the game �" the energy, perseverance, skills, artistry, bonhomie, competitiveness, compassion between two sides, etc.

Celebrations of successes of tangibles and materials only are calamitous. We know, only 5 percent of people own 95 percent of global resources. It is calamitous to confine the celebration of success of goals in life’s game to only 5 percent people. The cultural realism, in which tangible and material success is so rare and scarce, vast majority of people can never be in happy situations. Everybody needs success and celebration in life. We all have equitable rights to be happy and thrilled in life. But this pop culture and contemporary liberal worldview has managed a calamitous situation, where only a few could manage to hit a goal in the game of life. Only a few celebrate and rest remain depressed. Only a handful is celebrities and vast majority remains uncelebrated. This surely is a recipe of calamity for humanity.

However, what we are talking about is true empowerment. We are talking about altogether new game of life, where this stupid rule of winning and losing does not work. In our game of life, everyone is a winner and nobody is depressed of losing. We are talking about the celebration of the successes of internal self-control. We are talking about the game of life, where our higher consciousness plays the sports with intangibles. In our new game, success is how we enjoy intangible elements, which are within us, in our consciousness. And that is why we are in true and lasting self-control of everything. We are in control of the elements of the game and we ourselves assign value and utility to what we do in our game. We are in self-control of our consciousness and that is why we enjoy sports, the rhythm of the game, the spirit of sportsmanship. We not only play the game, we own it, we make the rules and our celebration is not the success of a goal or two, but of the sports itself.

The true happiness of loneliness is in being our own masters. Masters of our own destiny, masters of our own happiness, masters of our own celebrations. The few may have the whole of universe in their castles but we have all our attainments and possessions within us, within our higher consciousness. 

We are lonely, we are in control, we are happy, and we are surely truly empowered. We celebrate, not successes but life itself. We are happy and thrilled always because we are what we are. We are lonely and at our best.

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Leaving You With Einstein’s Thoughts

There is something about this mesmerizing and mystically marvellous consciousness, a very cardinal idea of human life, about which I can never have enough. Talking about consciousness, I surely cannot forget to mention something, which Einstein said about it. This has great utility here, when we are talking about how everything starts and ends with consciousness. If ever, there happens to be a Theory of Everythingness, about which Einstein always was thrilled about, I am growingly becoming sure that it shall have to do with our perfect and total understanding of the idea of consciousness. This hypothesis of loneliness being a hugely facilitative time-space realism for empowerment and wellness, gets a major support, when we talk about what Einstein said about consciousness.

Einstein said, ‘No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.’ What Einstein talks about consciousness and what ancient wisdom also did; seems to be the same. Yes, we are talking about the mystical marvels of our magical brains and the intangibility of consciousness, which it creates for us. Einstein termed consciousness as an optical delusion. Since his declaration, humanity has known a lot about consciousness and has also begun to accept. First time in the history of humanity, we are in a position to see things from a Level of Consciousness, which was unavailable since thousands of years of our journeys, battling with so many crucial questions of life. As Einstein said, we have had so many questions about ourselves and the world we lived but answers were either not coming or they were just a manipulation of human ingenuity to fill in gaps with something smart.

Lewis Thomas said, ‘Only two centuries ago, we could explain everything about everything, out of pure reason, and now most of that elaborate and harmonious structure has come apart before our eyes. We are dumb..... We have discovered how to ask important questions, and now we really do need, as an urgent matter, some answers. We now know that we cannot do this any longer by searching our minds, for there is not enough there to search, nor can we find the truth by guessing at it or by making up stories for ourselves. We cannot stop where we are, stuck with today's level of understanding, nor can we go back. I do not see that we have any real choice in this, for I can see only the one way ahead. We need science, more and better science, not for its technology, not for leisure, not even for health and longevity, but for the hope of wisdom which our kind of culture must acquire for its survival.’

The key idea, which comes out of Einstein’s opinion about Levels of Consciousnesses is that since long, we have faced problems, which is one level of our consciousness. However, this same level of consciousness cannot help us attain solutions. We need to shift to a higher level of consciousness. This higher consciousness is holistic, assimilative and integrative in its perspective and accepts realism from a singular perspective of objective logic.

Now that modern science has made us know so much about how our brains work, humanity has landed at such a Level of Consciousness, which is surely much higher and qualitatively different from what we had in the past. This new consciousness level, which we have managed because of our scientific understanding of our brains, has almost all answers and they are the true ones. As we understand the brain mechanism and its functional mystery, we are looking at answers of age-old problems with new knowledge of the 3Cs. The knowledge of brain has engendered the new wisdom of consciousness, cognition and causality, which has many true answers as well as the right perspectives of possible true answers.

As Einstein said, not knowing about certain realism creates a layer of consciousness, which manufactures troubles and problems for most of us. Knowing the same realism and its multidimensional mechanism empowers us and lands us on a higher platform of consciousness, which can then design and devise solutions. This is very practical prescription for contemporary humanity and its troubles. We have talked about this in detail in this book. Loneliness and its dysfunctional imagery in our populist perceptions emanate out of our age-old beliefs about realism. However, when we approach the same issue with a higher level of consciousness, the cognition changes and this creates a new causality, which accepts that loneliness is not a trouble, but a hugely facilitative tool of our higher consciousness.

Understanding about our brain is the new level of consciousness, which Einstein talked of, where solutions are engendered. It has to be embraced with learned and practiced humility of compassionate acceptance that in most moments of our life, we are mostly a function of our subconscious selves �" a state or layer of consciousness, where most actions and behaviours are auto-mode processing. It is an action-reaction mechanism our brain is designed for. However, the same brain has also evolved to accept higher values and conscious choices, often overriding the auto-mode instinctive life-living choices. This conscious layer is our solution providing genius. The subconscious mind is just responding and therefore leaving loads of fragmented thoughts. This splits us and lands us in chaos and conflicts. The higher consciousness is a mind positioning, which rises above drift and flux choices and streamlines all thoughts in a fruitful linearity. 

This symmetrical thought processing is a layer of consciousness Einstein speaks of as solution provider. We all have to attain it. This is true success for us. And this success comes when we know and accept the objective knowledge about how our brain works for us. Once we accept this, we shall learn that not only loneliness, rather many other realism of our life-living experiences are not the way we have been accepting them since ages. We are in our perspectives and our perspectives are in us. Therefore, when we accept this new perspective, we change and with our change, our perspective changes to the new cognition and causalities.

That is why it has been my humble insistence that humanity in 21st century must discard all other partial and lopsided perspectives and ideas about we, our lives and connect we had with the outside world. We must unlearn the old and obsolete notions of consciousness, cognition and causality and accept the new, holistic and singularly objective wisdom, which modern scientific knowledge makes available for us.

Everything starts and ends with our brains, our mind consciousness. This brain engendered mind consciousness levels, we have within all of us, and knowledge about them is one huge facilitator of wisdom and lasting joys and peace. However, by design and evolution, this brain is oriented for tumult and chaos. From ancient people, 3000 years back to modern scientists, all wise people have been warning us to know this brain mechanism and mind consciousness well and then use the energy of our higher consciousness to have perfect control of this mystically marvellous brain.

Scientists have been warning us that all intelligent races finally become extinct and we as a race have attained this critical intelligence. This suggests, we have evolved a brain, which has engendered such a consciousness, which is too smart, too ingenious and too arbitrary to let us live a settled and smooth lives. See the collective troubles of humanity and anyone can see how our collective intelligence has pushed us to the brink of self-destruction and complete annihilation. This stupid brain and its age-old mind consciousness of trouble making is out and at its capriciously randomized worst, auguring disaster for humanity. Personal lives too are being made a poor slave of this stupid.

Understanding mind, the functional entity of brain reveals how we live in a world contrary to our age-old beliefs and ideas. We buoy up and down in the vast ocean of sub-consciousness, only occasionally surfacing above onto the atmosphere of consciousness. Most of our personal troubles are created in our subconscious self. We know little about them, are very poorly aware about them and have little control over them. This is the level of consciousness; Einstein talked about as the problem creator domain. As we understand our mind consciousness, its mechanism and functioning, we empower our consciousness to be in better control of our hugely vast subconscious domain. This empowered consciousness is the level of solutions.

This is time we know the stupid and make it shed its randomized and chaotic ways. It is time, we take a firm grip on our destinies by knowing about brain mechanism and how it engenders for us the critical realism of the 3Cs �" Consciousness, Cognition and Causality. As we get to know them, we are in full and conscious control of our mind consciousness, which brain creates for us. As we get to know this stupid, we shape our destinies, the way we wish.

As I conclude, I wish to share with you two more quotes from Einstein, which I firmly believe stand out as the most potent solution of all shades of the problem of loneliness. What Einstein said, if accepted, is the ultimate solution of loneliness, if it is accepted as a challenge and possible trouble.

Einstein said, ‘I want to know how God created this world. I am not interested in this or that phenomenon, in the spectrum of this or that element. I want to know His thoughts; the rest are details.’

Einstein also said, ‘The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the source of all true art and science.’

Now, let us relate Einstein’s words with the realism of loneliness. What most people complain of when they say they feel bad about loneliness? It is connect they are speaking about. Scientists say that loneliness is all about a perceived lack of connect with entities around in one’s ambient milieus. So, if we have this missing connect, we are never with the debilitating feeling of loneliness!

Well then let us have this magical and transcendental connect. Let us be objectively logical to accept that only real knowledge and wisdom connects. Spiritualism means connecting the microcosm with macrocosm. Yogic philosophy of India talked about this transcendental connects of self with cosmic consciousness, around 3000 years back for lasting wellness. When we have real knowledge, we are truly connected with cosmic causality. A person who has the power of knowledge has the true connect with all causalities around him or her. That ensures, he or she is never lonely. We have already talked how researchers conclude that those who are more educated and knowledgeable have lesser incidence of loneliness. It is easy to accept how knowledge is the real connect.

What Einstein is talking about is his transcendental curiosity and will to connect with true knowledge and wisdom. He was not interested in God but he was immensely and perpetually interested in knowledge about the core concept, which surrounds the idea of divinity. He was thrilled infinitely about all things that are mysterious, which humanity has not yet known. His curiosity and inquisitiveness is transcendental. He was always connected with every speck and detail around him. He was never lonely but with loads of his own consciously selected curiosities and inquisitiveness.

Most often, people with different ages feel the disconnect with people, their own milieus and larger purpose of life. Moreover, this disconnect or lack of connect brings about the very troublesome emotion of feeling alienated. Somehow, Einstein points out to this crucial fact that true and real connects is intangible �" not physical but mental. Knowledge is the real and lasting connect with everything around us. We have already talked about how lasting wellness can come to us through lasting connect between generic elements and as our consciousness is intangible, its lasting connects can come only through intangibilities. Knowledge is the real intangible connect.

In contemporary cultures, the worst casualty is average person’s disconnect with instinctive human curiosity and inquisitiveness. Especially, the young generations feel knowledge is optional, even a burden. There is an insistence on living life, at the cost of ignoring knowledge about life-living essentials. Einstein’s insistence is on perpetuity of the joy and thrill of knowing �" connecting to everything in the cosmos, from people to ideas, through knowledge and wisdom. People of any age, whether they are kids, young or old; this inquisitiveness should always remain as primary energy of all actions and behaviours. There is nothing but knowledge that truly connects us with things other than us. It is rare that a kid feels loneliness. He or she is always busy connecting physically as well as mentally to everything real or imaginary around him or her. Kids are wired for curiosity and inquisitiveness, even when societies usually smother their innate curiosities. However, as we grow, we stop to actually keep growing. We stop connecting. We stop the crucial linkages of knowledge. Modern cultures insist on education as means to acquire skills about jobs and careers but the crucial life-living knowledge is being sidelined. So, we may be skilled but not truly knowledgeable.

Therefore, Einstein is never lonely as he is always connecting and feeling joyous and thrilled, not in finding answers and solutions. He is thrilled as the very energy of inquisitiveness is good enough for him. He is thrilled by feeling connected to the process of delving into the mystical world �" being connected to the art and science of inquisitiveness.

We too have to learn this mastery of the artistry of being in perpetually connect with this art and science of inquisitiveness about the mystical universe �" everything around us, till life allows us time. Knowledge connects, it keeps us thrilled and in joy of being inseparable part of the colossal whole. Yes, everyone is truly lonely in his or her pursuits of knowledge as this process is intangible and operative at the intangible level of consciousness. A consciousness filled with connects of inquisitiveness of knowledge lands us at this facilitative time-space realism of happy loneliness. We are then lonely and at our happiest best.

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Accept My Gratitude

Writing something is a daunting task as there is always a lurking apprehension of it not being of utility for some readers. I however feel at ease, because of my faith in magnanimity of readers. I am happily sure; you shall forgive if my efforts could not be up to your expectations. Thank you so much for being with me and allowing me to share with you. Wish you an empowered life; with the prosperity of the consciousness.

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About The Author

 

People say, what conspire to make you what you finally become are always behind the veil of intangibility. Someone called it ‘Intangible-Affectors’. Inquisitiveness was the soil, I was born with and the seeds, these intangible-affectors planted in me made me somewhat analytical. My long stint in media, in different capacities as journalist, as brand professional and strategic planning, conspired too! However, I must say it with all innocence at my behest that the chief conspirators of my making have been the loads of beautiful and multi-dimensional people, who traversed along me, in my life journey so far. The mutuality and innocence of love and compassion always prevailed and magically worked as the catalyst in my learning and most importantly, unlearning from these people. Unconsciously, these amazing people also worked out to be the live theatres of my experiments with my life’s scripts. I, sharing with you as a writer, is essentially my very modest way to express my gratitude for all of them. In my stupidities is my innocence of love for all my beautifully worthy conspirators! 

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Other Titles By Santosh Jha

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