demon creature (spider)

My lashes batted open

I'm wrapped in my blanket cocoon

My spirit’s just been broken

A f*****g spider’s in my room

I use my butt cheek lasers

I make use of intestinal gas 

The demon cannot handle the flavor

Nor the potence of this a*s 

However nothing’s working

I just smacked it with a broom

I swear I saw it smirking

Before it started to reproduce

Holy corn nuts im shitting trucks

These offspring are crawling everywhere

I guess im out of luck

I'll sleep in the doghouse , that b***h has to share