An Easier Form of Suicide

"born to push you around, better just stay down."

 

 

^{‘i’m coming apart at the seams,’
you whispered.
[darling, i already knew that.]
you,
       with your beautiful, bruised skin,
       and handmarks down your spine,
       you’ve got his fingerprints all over you.
you never were very strong anyway.}

 

^{you say he holds your fragile dreams
in his cruel grasp,
                         [the one you’re so familiar with.]
      but why do anything about it?
you,
       with your choked breaths,
       broken dreams and broken hearts,
       i know you’ll settle for last place.
‘cause they say
    you’ve always got a second choice,
      [a second chance,]
           but not anymore.}

 

^{you,
       used to be alive,
       knew how to smile [did you forget?]
       had lights in your eyes
[you still do.
                  or are they just the tears?]
there’s all these broken question marks
beneath your paper-thin skin.
          needled and bloodless,
you’ll take what he gives.
         [you’ll give what he takes.]}

 

^{your reflection looks more alive than you,
    at least she’s whole.
        look at yourself,
              do you see what he’s done?
you,
       and your twisted spine,
       with your broken bones
       crushing your scarred heart.
[do you care at all?]
               don’t you know what he’s doing?
           [you don’t know what you’re doing]
you can lie to yourself,
        but i see right through you.
     i’ll be here to sew up your wounds now,
     but i’m running out of stitches faster
     than he’s running out of steam,
     and this train[wreck] won’t stop.
[but for now, i’m here,
            and i’ll stitch up your seams.]}

      

^{he tells you that you belong to him,
that his bruises on your arms are proof.
             but it’s not true.
       the daylight tells lies,
             those bruises were caused by you,
       so get out while you can['t].
you,
       marked and tainted,
       by his twisted intentions,
       you say you have no choice.
[but darling, you choose to say ‘yes.’]
i can’t understand you.
    are you addicted to the taste of your own blood?
        or do you savor that moment,
that split-second of touch before he hits you?
      maybe you feel wanted,
            in his fumbled, rough kisses, and lustful passion.
              [how can you pretend he loves you?]}

 

^{you,
       you used to love so easily,
       you’re now broken so easily,
       as you swallow your pride.
how did he do this to you?
do you ever wonder?
       each morning you
take your pills, lie to yourself
       look in the mirror
and say it’s getting better
       don’t you know?
you’re the one hurting yourself.
       you once said you loved life
now it’s just an easier form of suicide.}

 

 

 

Awards

1st

Jul 26, 2010

• Child memories, the good, bad, and ugly
• An Easier Form Suicide

 

2nd place

Aug 3, 2010

• Any and all welcome
• An Easier Form Suicide

 

Queen/King

Aug 7, 2010

• Writing Galore!
• An Easier Form Suicide

 

2nd Place

Aug 23, 2010

• From my mind to yours......
• An Easier Form Suicide

 

Winner!

Aug 23, 2010

• ALCOHOL AND DRUG ADDICTION
• An Easier Form Suicide

 

Silver

Aug 31, 2010

• Sweet Suffering.
• An Easier Form Suicide

Author's Note

"born to push you around, better just stay down. you pull away, he hits the flesh, you hit the ground. mouths so full of lies tend to black your eyes. just keep them closed--keep praying, just keep waiting."

One of my favorites.

Reviews

[Radioactive]

Amazing and truly, truly one of the most beautiful things that I have read in a long time.

"with your choked breaths,
broken dreams and broken hearts,
i know you’ll settle for last place.
‘cause they say
you’ve always got a second choice,
[a second chance,]
but not anymore."

[r]

I am speechless, utterly speechless. And amazed, beyond amazed.

And you only started writing poetry January of last year?! How is it possible for you to be this damn good?!

I love the form of it, the words in brackets. Wonderful, raw, sad, breathtaking.

You surely are a true poet!

[Eshe' Allen]

excellent. love the style. led me through the journey as if holding my hand. very nice.


-masheika

[the-One-with-the-Darkne..]

incredibly writtten and very good

[Ima]

WOW... many people would call it creepy ... but i loved it ... the rashness in it is what makes it a worthy read ... loved it