Don't mess with me..

 

 

A lock of hair falling on my face,

A blush of red colouring my cheek,

My sweet slow pace,

My maners so meek,

That make me appear all humble and tame,

The slender body looking weak,

The heavy lids with special grace,

All leave an impression of a girl you seek,

But be warned people don't go for the surface,

Look inside the heart to be all briefed,

The way I appear on the outside is not the base,

I am actually very strong and not at all sleek,

I am not the one who provides you with solace,

My well kept emotions nowhere do leak,

I am a burning bright blaze,

So don't mess with me folks,

'coz I am strong enough to act as a blade...

 

 

Author's Note

Not a very good write but felt like puttig it up anyways ;) Suggestions are welcome.

Reviews

[Inci]

I am a burning bright blaze,
So don't mess with me folks,
'coz I am strong enough to act as a blade...
well done... great poem.. i liked the aggression and calmness exhibited simultaneosly

[Buddhistboy73]

Ok, so couple of small issues with the spelling - maners should read manners. Also, not sure about the rhyming of blaze and blade.
Ok, so that said, I thought this was a good write, and from the heart, which is what counts with poetry isn;t it?
You convey the message very well I thought, so well done!

[Sean M. Addams]

nice job on this..a very deep and well expressed piece..nice work!!

[deeps]

I think it is a very wonderful write! It's quite the powerful read!
I like this. I agree with what Craig said with this.

[Avocations of Amber]

Powerful message of empowerment and good self reflection here......
To me, a poem is like a window to the soul. Your strength and sense of resolve is evident in these lines and that is a good thing. You did a nice job of convincing the reader of what's on the outside and then you wrapped it up by delivering your true side. I liked it!

[An owl on the moon]

Powerful. You express one who seems so mild and meek, yet underneath lies a depthful, rich courage. Like a spring flower rising from the iced ground, you reveal a strength in tender beauty.

[harman kour]

such are the women (like u) our world truly needs... strong, assertive and independent... good one! :)

[Dev]

Yeah.. Never judge a book by its cover.. Thats the worst judgement you can ever make.. This one is a good write... It reflects on how you have self respect and thats one quality everyone should have

xo :)

[Shalini Dinesh]

nice alert to the people around you, "don't mess with me" .. i enjoyed reading this poem

[MissWordSmith]

loved the message you sent with this poem.
I think you could work on the second half because the flow sort of stops there...
Cuz the first part...all your descriptions about your meek self...that was brilliant.
Keep it up!