The Elements

I know this is a big cliche, but I've written an elemental poem, my second one. This one is more refined and subtle than the last one. (I don't care for that one at all, looking back.) : )

The endless, tranquil stream flows out

From silver, stirring spring,

The simple, flowing harmony

Of spirits' joy to sing.

 

The flame within the torch's hold

Unleashes amber light.

With flashing beams and warmth, it brings

A beacon through the night.

 

The boulder with its coat of moss,

A stone of deepest heart.

It stands, an anchor of true faith,

For those who with souls of art.

 

The final breeze of wisdom free

Spreads out across the land.

It's joy and love, it's peace and calm,

Like shifting golden sand.

Author's Note

As always, feel free to critique.

Reviews

[Lily1111]

Well, being the illegitimate daughter of Dr. Suess, I must say that I really enjoyed the rhyme incorporated so well in this poem. It is natural and unforced. But what I really like about this poem is the rhythm. It absolutely sings as you read it! This is only the second poem of yours that I have read, but your gift of conveying imagery is presented here again. I especially liked the lines:

"The flame within the torch's hold
Unleases amber light
With flashing beams and warmth, it brings
A beacon though the night"

[Thomas James Martin]

Quite beautiful. Illustrates your wondrous love of nature and its images which are unreproducible in the end. I sense how visual you are and would love to see some of your paintings if you have some photos posted here.

Tom

[Siddartha Beth Pierce]

This is quite beautiful - I feel that you stopped it before you were finished however as if there was more that you wanted to say but I may be wrong. Still, it has a wonderful cadence and rhythm. Thank you so much. Your image is one I believe I used in my own Elemental Poem 'The Elements of the Celtic Tradition'. Our universes collide once more. Cheers.
Light my friend,
Siddartha

[Stephen Ownby]

Okay, pretty images. So, nature is pretty. I'm just curious to find out what you are trying to SAY here. I understand that you have a deep respect for nature, but poems have to say something deeper, something beyond the obvious. Still, good imagery.