Crimson Darkness

A nightmare...

I lost a piece, a piece of my heart

It was broken and pulled apart

 

Now I cry a river of blood

And drown in the created flood

 

I claw my way back to the fore

Wishing I could be what I was before

 

I desperately search for the lost piece

A longing for serenity and the lost peace

 

I wade through the river and seek

What I lost and became so weak

 

This crimson darkness engulfing me

Won’t let my ravaged heart silent be

 

The cacophony of screams surrounding me

Desperate and hurt forever I will be

 

I emerge from the room and darkness see

This crimson death numbing, cursing I flee

 

Running I come to the white door

A sight for sore eyes I wish no more

 

What lies beyond I fail to discern

Fleeing this hell, my only concern

 

I push the door, creaking it opens wide

I plunge forward, forgotten all pride

 

The room I land in, crimson it smiles

A new nightmare, wrapped in vile

 

I lose all control and scream my fears

My face pale and moist with tears

 

I fall to the ground hopeless I feel

A few moments I wish I could steal

 

I look around and see my heart

Throbbing and hurt, just torn apart

 

Sobbing and hurt I wake up in cold sweat

Dousing my fears, I have paid my debt

Author's Note

OK I'm not sure what this is about, it just came to me and i penned it down, tell me what you think!

Reviews

[sakshi arora]

you have good writing skills :)

[Sid]

Thank you!

[Frieda P]

Sounds like horrible nightmares of real life circumstances and feelings, the desperation is palpable in this read....conjures up all kinds or twists of life. Nice one.

[Sid]

Thank you!

[Becca Bishop]

It's got a very nice rhythm but the rhyming is really forced at times. Also, and I don't know why this bugged me so much but it did, I couldn't really find the point to the piece. Maybe I missed something? Like I said it's got a really nice beat to it and it's really cool when you read it out loud but it kind of seemed like you were just putting down whatever rhymed. But if this is a nightmare you had then I guess it doesn't really have to make sense. Ok, I retract everything I said above and replace it with: NICE WRITE!!!! (As usual) :D :D :D

[Sid]

Thanks Becca, frankly I don't know what to make of it either just one of those that came to me but I don't know what to do with it...glad you stopped by :D

[Becca Bishop]

I totally understand!!! I love when stuff just comes to me, not that that happens often :P Sorry if I was really mean...I really didn't want to hurt your feelings or anything....

[Cara]

soo nice write,

[Sid]

Thank you Cara!

[rnuff]

deep write, very poetic enjoyed

[Sid]

Thank you, glad you enjoyed it!

[Jordan's Back]

Deep Sorrowful, Disparaging. Wonderful

[Sid]

Thank you!

[Damien Davison]

Sounds pretty intense, must have been a fun journey to write this out and experience it in your mind. Thanks for sharing!

[Sid]

It definitely was fun imagining it and writing it out, thank you for the read and review!

[Salar Majak]

nightmares nightmares nightmare. this is what came to my mind whrn i read this, it's simple although really complicated, it tells the story of an aching mind, i don't know, but i like it, it's chaotic XD, oh and by the way most the things i write i'm not sure where they come from :P but that is where the beauty of mistery lies right?

[Sid]

Hehe, yeah agreed! Thank you, glad you like it! :)

[Jack Reaper]

hey ok 2 things.. first, ive had a couple of these, not really sure what the hell its about, but sometimes thats the fun of it. and second, its good to see you back. youve done some great work here yet again!

[Sid]

Thank you Jack!

[Mia]

I don't think it is important to understand what everything means all the time. Our emotions and such are far more advanced and complicated than our minds. We feel and experience them faster than we can process them. If you needed to know you would. Don’t miss out on enjoying what you've created trying to figure it all out. We are charming because most of the time we're clueless even though we pretend to know it all. Whatever this is about there is hurt and distress and you portrayed the emotion well...considering there wasn't an idea in mind. I'm amazed! Well done Sid!

[Sid]

Thank you for the read and review Mia and you are right it was fun writing it though I don't know what it means and I guess it's enough I had fun...thank you again!