The car splutters Starts Petrol vapors Burns, smarts Eyes in tears Mind meanders In-out, in-out Tomorrow's near Hell, Tomorrow's here Excuse me, sir Mutters Bloody beggar Gimme a penny, Sir Stutters Grumble, mumble Fumble Trouble The engine dies More trouble Horn honks Jibes, taunts Start the car, goddammit Wait, awhile Smile Please, smile Patience, dear Mind meanders Tomorrow's here Insecurities, fear Warrants, arrests Handcuffs, bail Godforsaken jail Hell, Are you serious? No really, jail? The car splutters Starts
. this entire poem is an incredible metaphor for everything that existence entails ... and it touches the surreal in parts ... it's amazing to write free verse ... one gets to explore the nuances of exquisite poetic expression within the realm of brevity ... it's like a simultaneous evolution of thought and vocabulary ... initially, it slows one down ... but then when the momentum picks up ... there's hardly any difference between an aspiring poet or an aspiring philosopher or for that matter ... an aspiring politician ... ultimately, it's all about skillful communication through words ... preceded ... but of course ... by congruent actions that speak louder ... i truly believe that words have to be substantiated with action ... rather words usually exude conviction when they are preceded by action ... as actions speak louder ...
the quick bursts of today's existence seeded in a happenstance~ a scene that relates the breathless/thoughtless rush of nonthinking movements humanity engages in every twenty~four hour cycle of existence~
wild ride of your pen pouring ink in rhythm that kicks the brain into critical thinking motion~bravo!
jail eh.... hmm..... sounds like me on my way to work... disjointed thoughts... well, except for the jail part... never been arrested...it's a great poem
I Love your flow, you can just feel what you write...where you've been and where you are going. The sights, the sounds...I can almost taste and feel it. Excellent write.
An engineer, with a management degree, I am passionate about and fascinated by the arts – literature, movies, music and photography, et al. Creative writing, especially poetry is the raison d&rs.. more..