It was me all along

UNSOLVED CHAPTER 2

IT WAS ME ALL ALONG

I am quivering in my  toilet, and I am scared; very very scared. Because I have figured out something horrible. I have a bottle of acid and any thriller genre fans know how this is going to end but how did my life took a turn like this...

                                                                                 It was in the middle of my college year that I understood how city life takes the innocence and purity of people who come here allured by the prospect of charismatic infrastructure, flamboyant night-life and the grimly gay standard of living. Once I had been a guy who would think of giving curses as a sin and taking alcohols and drugs as something so bad that I disgusted people who took them. But now here was I, high on weed and blabbering about something I can't remember. My friend had fallen asleep next to me like a corpse. I was not in the mood to sleep 'cause I was as hungry as a pregnant whale. I went out to have purchase some snacks from the vendors but none was open. Walking like crazy, I walked miles before I stumbled upon something unusual. I had taken a turn along a path and a Chinese food cart came into my view. But you expect a cook swirling the utensils in to and fro motion; not a boy of my age butchering down the man with a long knife. I was too scared to move. When the boy had mauled the owner till his blood left his body, his face turned towards me. I should have cried for help or atleast ran to call the cops. Instead I was paralyzed by his face. It was eerie, his face was blurred in my view. I could only see two ends of the lips in a shape like he was grinning. I fell unconscious. But some strange pain was not ready to leave me. I could see him, the boy without face but now a bit more closely. And then when he had finished his killing he looked at me again, now I could see a little of his hair, and they were in spikes; their color same as mine. I woke up screaming and gave a sigh of relief when I saw that it was just a dream...or rather a nightmare. I went to the bathroom and took a hold of my brush. I was applying the toothpaste when I looked in the mirror, and my clutch on toothpaste became so tight that a large portion of it fell in the sink. Instead of my reflection in the mirror I could see the same boy with same little portion of his hair and lips. I couldn't make a head or tail of it. I tried to clean the mirror but it was of no use. I tried to hit my head with something; this must be a dream, this must be a dream. Wherever I would go the same reflection I could see in all the things that provided reflection of the human body. 

               This time at home, I was alone with the packet of weed and a bong. I smoked a high amount that day. I fell asleep again, but due to restlessness and fear I woke up after a minute or two and I got a call from Ana, my girlfriend. 

"What the hell have you been upto , these past few weeks? No call, nothing."

"I...I was ill"

"And you didn't think it was necessary to tell me. What am I to you?" 

Nothing I wanted to scream You are nothing. You are a f*****g gold-digger. Why after two weeks of isolation do you want to contact me. And you are blaming me again. F**k you!!!! 

"Do have something to say or not. Or now I don't even deserve to be replied"

And the conversation went from bad to worse. 

"I am coming at your house" I said and cut the phone. I had to break up already, I can't continue like this. I turned up near her penthouse and when I tried to knock the door, it was already open. I said "Ana". But the only reply was silence. I went in slowly and heard a faint sound coming from her bedroom. "Ana are you there?" I said " I am coming in". I opened the door slowly and saw fell back stupified. Her face was towards me and she was being raped by someone...someone who was clad in same clothes as me. She was screaming but due to her cold, her voice was loud enough only to reach the boundary of the door of the bedroom. But she didn't looked at me, infact she ignored me like I didn't even existed there. She just screamed "Don't...Don't do it please. You are not like this. I am sorry to have hurt you." So the b***h was double-timing me but before I could try to do something I fell unconscious again and before I descended into darkness I could see him turning his face at me, her rapist or her ex or... but it was the same faceless boy but now his burred face was showing full vie of his grin, his hairs and his ears; that were pointy as same as me. What the hell's happening?  and so a few days went like this. My reflection's blurriness were getting clearer and the most frightening thing was he was beginning to look more and more similar to me. The doses of went went high and more people were murdered in the city who knew me somehow. Especially who had conflict with me somehow. Until one day when I was crying in pain. I was having a bad trip. I had just finished three joints and two rounds of bong. I saw montages, in my sleep in first person perspective of myself going near a chinese food kart and having an argument with the owner who wouldn't make more noodles saying that his stocks were finished. I saw myself taking a knife and mauling him to death, stabbing him mercilessly in the heart and wrenching his gut out. He was gasping for help, screaming for mercy but all I had to give him was death and a wide grin of achievement on my face. Then the scene shifted to my girlfriend's house where I quarreled with her for breakup and she was more than happy to give it. But where's the repayment for all the money I had wasted on your clothes, movies and those meaningless dates. I had to have payback and asked for sex. But she wouldn't agree. Well then I have to take my payment forcibly and I did all those horrible things with her before smothering her face with the pillow. Then the scenes went on shifting from one murder to another. I woke up with pangs of pain in my head and body. I heard something crashing in the toilet. With an out-of-blue reflex, I took the knife from my kitchen and ran to toilet. The mirror was cracked but as I slowly went to check it, the reflection was blurred anymore but it was more than ever cleared. My own image stood in front of me. And I knew it, the flashbacks rammed into my head like an invisible pen-drive of memories have been inserted into me. And with a thump I sat on the toilet seat. I took the knife and held it in my grasp in mid-air. My reflection was said, it was screaming. I took a joint before...I pierced the knife in my heart. How the police never came to caught me, I am clueless. I am dying because I know one thing with absolute certainty. I knew who was the killer. It was me all along.

Author's Note

Sorry for bad grammar and the story is somewhat pointless. I wanted to do a surreal writing but I ended up with this thing! ugh...

Reviews

[barleygirl]

I think you are being too hard on yourself. You write something in your authors note that sounds like you feel this writing is a failure. I don’t agree with you. I think there are some really strong points in your macabre tale. The thing that makes this most interesting is the way you write with good pacing . . . the action happens fairly quickly, one thing after another, so that the story draws the reader along with interest & curiosity. Another thing that’s strong in your writing is the way you are uninhibited in writing whatever comes to your mind. It sounds fairly unexpected, the way each outrageous thing happens, then we’re not expecting this narrator to be such a crazed serial killer, but you just have him chopping people down, one after another. That is totally uninhibited killing! It’s almost funny, but it’s also sick & freaky. This is a great formula for a macabre story. There are only a few weaknesses, as you know, your English construction is a little bumpy here & there. Also, there are places where you take the easy way out instead of thinking up something outrageous to happen next. Sometimes you have the narrator falling into a trance, which is just an easy way to get out of whatever situation he is in. But I think you could go a bit further & think of a more imaginative way to get the narrator out of each situation & on to the next one. Your way of storytelling is very carefree & a little bit crazed, which gives your story a weird texture, along with the gory killing spree (((HUGS))) Fondly, Margie

[Shubham Sharma]

Thank you. I am writing such fast paced stories now only to improve my English. This story too wasn't written with any serious thinking by me.😅😅

[Naomi Wicks]

Pointless?? It's raw and powerful, you've done well! Sure, grammar can be worked on, but you've got a real knack for this, believe in yourself. There's nothing I can point out that barleygirl didn't already say perfectly - so I'll just offer a little tip I know! If you want to reduce your word count for a potential agent (they often have desired amount of words) go through your work and find all the times you use the word "that". See if you can take it out. For example: "I woke up screaming and gave a sigh of relief when I saw that it was just a dream..." works exactly the same when you take the word 'that' out "I woke up screaming and gave a sigh of relief when I saw it was just a dream..."
That's the only handy hint I would give you because you've got your flair already and I can tell you're a passionate person as you write, I definitely like your writer's voice!

[Shubham Sharma]

Thank you. I really appreciate your criticism on my work. I am working hard on my grammar so these stories are just writing prompts I imagine everyday. Thank you once again

[¿]

Sometimes "ugh" is a thriller read indeed just like yours here!!
How talented and cunning the discoverer of drugs are no?!....a tragic thing they disclosed on earth....this story and several more reading from my atmosphere forced me to think it....
Here the unconsciousness and gloom you felt on you surroundings are very dangerous I guess...from the point of view of the outer world...where many such inauspicious are taking place with more breath takings!!
And it's your speciality that a mind blowing end of story you put but all unknown you stay....Great read indeed!

[Shubham Sharma]

Thanks. Atleast someone didn't think this was just a piece of s**t.

[¿]

Am honoured by being someone! Wc😊...!!