The Precipice of Reason

There are dreams, there are dark passions and there's cold rationality...Which road should I take?

Behold! Upon this precipice I stand
One side is home to Reason's fertile plain
The other plummets down to depths insane
My mind has shaped the terrain of this land

I hear no words of wisdom and no hand
Comes forth to enlighten my hapless brain
I lunge at Dreamy skies but fear the pain
Of falling back upon the desert sand

One step away from either end: My feet
Have walked along this precipice for long
Of Blue and Black and Green whom must I meet?

I see them enthralled by the skylark's song
Where lies the nest, though, of the songbird sweet
Midst all pervading mists of right and wrong?

Author's Note

This is an attempt a Petrarchan sonnet... Do tell me to what extent I have succeeded...

Reviews

[Christina May Shanaberg]

Honey, I just write and do not profess to be a literary scholar; however, I really enjoyed reading this "sonnet."

I really loved so many of your words that to write all of them would, simply, be recopying your poem.

I case ya don't know, yet; wow!!

[asdarkeyesclose]

"Where lies the nest, though, of the songbird sweet
Midst all pervading mists of right and wrong?"

One of my favourite forms- the musical quality of the petrachan sonnet like a wave drifting to the shore, the perfect vehicle for an isolated poetic thought or emotion. Here i could see the precipice, so well depicted in the poetry, feel the poet caught between two extremes (dream/rationality) and sense the pull on the mind of each. Loved the last stanza, so poetic with the skylark :)

[Devons]

I think the structure you were trying to achieve has worked extremely well, and the message is conveyed exactly through these words. It is a faultless piece of work, and expressed with sagacious ease and clarity. It's quite a lyrical piece and and has a peaceful and subtle strength and quality. Strange that the theme of the poem makes me think more of ambition than reason, but then they are inextricably linked, and spin off one another. I really admired the line:
"Of Blue and Black and Green whom must I meet?"
.... the use of colour to represent outcome is quite stimulating; it almost creates the impression of a ball jumping and bolting on a roulette wheel..
But for me the last verse is the most telling, with its intelligence as poetry and its evocative insight:
"I see them enthralled by the skylark's song
Where lies the nest, though, of the songbird sweet
Midst all pervading mists of right and wrong?"
A very skilful piece of craftsmanship, its power lying within its subtle and somehow reassuring expressiveness.

[emmajoy]

Hmm ... not sure I can advise one way or another re this being a Petrachan sonnet, know a sonnet is fourteen lines long and that according to type has to have a certain meter, but, not sure of this at all. However, your phrasing is so fine and the words really do create a picture .. to me that's all important.

'I lunge at Dreamy skies but fear the pain
Of falling back upon the desert sand' .. ...think many can understand that

I must learn more about forms of this and that, am sadly ignorant.

[Abdul Aziz]

I enjoyed the poem, and the structure you have employed. The thoughts you have laid forth here are very relevant to everyone. Personally, I feel that "lunging at dreamy skies" holds more promise than walking along the precipice, dreading the steep fall. If the Wright brothers had feared the pain of falling back to land, who knows, we might not have been in this present day and age of aviation.
I think the poem is a bit overly simplistic though. You could have added a little subtelty. I do think this is a very good poem. Just not as great as your other ones.
All said and done, I enjoyed reading this poem.