Removed...

A tale of a girl who was removed from her world...

Scared and shivering
Impossibly alone
Dejected I stand
Rejected by the world
Branded a burden, I trudge

With no sense of purpose

Smiles like painted masks
Plaster my face
I am nothing but a waste of space;
An unwanted existence

Each night I try to sleep
I face my demons
Who try to devour me and my sanity
Tearing me apart with
The words I cannot say...

Laying awake in bed all night,
Afraid to drown in the
Sea of cold voices
Blaming me for being the way I am

A glimpse in the past,
Tightens my chest..
Laboured breathing,
And infinite heartache
Is what follows.

The scars I have
Are not from honourable battles
Won at the border...
They are carved
Some on my wrists
Others on my heart
By a lost girl;
A shadow of her lost battles
A raging war of survival;
Because sometimes I am ready to die,
But I still want to live more...

I stand at the wake of devastation
Seeing my attempts to escape
The cold cage of emptiness
Fall to nothing
Bit by bit
Redefining my worthlessness

I am trapped in my own mistakes
A price I have to pay
I still try to play along the charade
Of laughter and mindless talk

But sometimes when I am alone
And a single memory comes drifting by,
A reflection of my past
A picture of a broken soul,
Reminding me of the horrors,
The pain that comes in waves
Even when no wounds show

As I register the depth
Of the pit I have fallen into,
I try to find myself
In that midnight darkness
Waiting for the unknown,
I discern that
The walls closing in on me,
Cold and heartless,
Show no mercy...
So, I am left alone to live,
The nightmare that I have created,

The nightmare of a fragile girl,
Whose emotions are all over the place,
Stuttering and mumbling,
Making her way through the lonely walls
Of a never ending dark tunnel
Each stone resonating with her sad existence
Where the silence splits her open…
                       Making her way through a world
                        From where she was removed...

 

 

Author's Note

I know this one is a bit on the darker side, but please do tell me what you think of it.

Reviews

[Color of the Iris]

Again, this hits close to home for me. I too struggle with PTSD and depression. They both affect my life daily and trouble some of my relationships because the past is so hard to escape from sometimes. I also have scars on my body from cutting and have often dreamed of suicide because I have yet to find my place in this world where I truly belong. Only difference between the old me and me now is I know I can and will find that place soon. You're almost there. Just hold on. I'm here if you ever need someone to talk to.

[Moonlight]

That's really sweet of you. Thank you Color of the Iris. I am really sorry that you have had a hard time and I really hope that you only get better from this point. And of course, if you ever need to talk about it, I am here for you. :)

[Sebastian Falzarano]

I have to say, I was impressed by the flow of the lines and the choice of words. The atmosphere that was created was frighting, almost as if it was real. I felt as if I was the one stuck in this "nightmare world" that this poem creates; one of loneliness and despair.
I feel that this poem is directed towards people who wallow in their own self-depression; accepting their failures and losses without taking action to prove themselves wrong.
There was one line that I found didn't quite fit after rereading a few times was "Are not from honorable battles/Won at the border...". The line slightly throws off the flow of the poem, as it breaks the tension. Yet, there could be a reason why you wrote the line that I am missing, so it is all up to you if you want to leave it.
Overall, I found the poem to be an enjoyable read. This is the kind of poem that I personally always hope to find and read: dark, solid, entertaining. I applaud your work.

[Moonlight]

Thank you so much Sebastian. I am really glad that you enjoyed reading my poem and I am really glad that you could grasp the meaning of this poem to such a depth.

Also, about that line, yes.. it may have been a little out of place.. Because Whenever, I read the poem, I also feel that it just breaks the flow of the poem a little.. but all in all, I wanted to keep the way I had written at first. So, I didn't change it..

Thank you for your insightful review :)

[Sebastian Falzarano]

Your welcome. It is poems like yours that attract most of my attention. There are so many meanings to them, that forming analysis like this are fun!

[Moonlight]

That's nice to hear. :)

[Sebastian Falzarano]

Your welcome.

[El Chico]

Hi Moonlight,

Yours is the first poem i have read in quite a while. It truly is a very well written piece, certainly shows off your talent, well done!

[Moonlight]

Thanks El Chico! I really appreciate your reading my poem. :)

[Emily]

Great poem!
I loved it!
I love the way you started it!

[Moonlight]

Thanks Emily. It means a lot. :)

[Not here]

i enjoyed this even though and probably because it was more on the darker side. you did a fantastic job

[Moonlight]

Thanks a loy dante! I really glad you liked it. :)

[Daisy]

wow... great piece... and it shows a reality ans so much sorrow.... wonderful explanation

[Moonlight]

Thank you very much Daisy! :)

[Lizardo]

Wow, this one is really really deep. I simply love it, the format and every word of it. I can relate to this one though I'm not a girl lol.
So, I am left alone to live,
The nightmare that I have created,
That line is my favorite out all. Indeed we are left alone to live in a nightmare that was created by us, why would we want to that? I don't know, humans are unpredictable. Sometimes we try to find our way out of the nightmare and sometimes we just want someone to save us from the unholy darkness. But the best way to get out is by ourselves, make light out of nowhere, believe in ourselves, make happiness out of nowhere, if we spend our life trying to make others happy, we'll live in a nightmare until we die. It might sound selfish, but first our happiness and then the rest.
I don't know if you listen to Coldplay lol xD but you might want to check out their latest song: Adventure of a lifetime, trust me you'll like it.
So awesome poem, I really like it.

[Moonlight]

I will check out the song you suggested. I do love Coldplay after all.
And thank you so much Lizardo. It makes me really glad that you liked my poem. It was a little difficult to write it. But, I 'm glad it turned out well. :)

[Philip Muls]

Emotions running deep. Very genuine and authentic. An unwanted existence, strong wording, captivating.

Well done.

[Moonlight]

Thanks a lot Phillip. I really appreciate your reading and reviewing my poem. :)