Termites: Gnawing Pockets !!!

Termites: Gnawing Pockets !!!

A Poem by Floating on the feathers of a dandelion
"

I saw this lady in a metro train with a baby collapsed in her arms and the myriad of people passing by her, with not a single kind heart taking a single step towards her to offer her help.... We, the supposed "Samaritans"!! Huh!

"

 

 

 

 

 

 

I saw her from a distance, perched on the footpath,

Hardly draped into anything

Shreds of clothes hanging loose on her body

Disheveled hair, strands flying away revealing the receding hairline

Heavy eyelids burdened with the cruelties of life

Blues of eyes colorless with harshness

Rolling drops acknowledging the inadvertent acceptance

Parched lips parted in a futile prayer

The soul pleading silently for the life of the inanimate body of the child, laid in front of her

Living or dead, hard to make out

Not older than ten years

An uncorked empty bottle of medicine tethered to the uncontrollable wind

Some bread crumbs littered around his body

A flock of crows eyeing at the sumptuous food

While dogs licking it clean taking breaks only to sniff at the almost lifeless body

An old brass plate sparsely filled with some dried fallen leaves

No nickel shines from the plate

No one from the passing crowd seems to have even noticed the shattered lady awaiting the end of her child’s life

As I come closer I find her body paralyzed with pain

I give her a sympathetic look and move on with the crowd

Just like everyone else, disappearing from the pitiful beckoning sight

Ignoring, if any urges to help, spare two words of kindness or stroking the cold bodies breathing life

“I can’t let such things gnaw at my pocket and neither do I have the time for something so unimportant, after all it does not help me get a new business deal or does it!”

 I just move on like everyone else.

 

 

© 2008 Floating on the feathers of a dandelion


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Featured Review

This is absolutely brilliant and heart-breaking!!! I've been in this situation many times in my life..Romania, my country, is known all over the world for its strays and beggars!! Many of us pass them by, ignoring, not even noticing they are there...dirty, hungry, helpless, dead!!! Many of us think they're just pretending!!!! We pass them by regardless to their fate..without any regrets or second thoughts. Sometimes, but very rarely, someone would give them money or ask them if they're okay...but these people, probably used to our ignorance, are savage, they have probably forgotten how to receive someone else's help.
Even scientific theories have proven that the more people there are around a stranger in need of help the less likely he/she will receive actual help. You know why??? Because each person will think the same "Why should i help him. There are so many people around...someone else should do it"...hilarious and cruel in the same time.

Your poem is a great lesson about how selfish and self-centered we are...and we don't even know about it.
We pass the helpless by....the regrets pass us by ...so fast!!!!

I loved your creation and i will definitely save it in my library!!! Awesome work!!!!!
Many many kudos!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted 16 Years Ago


4 of 4 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

You captured the sense of despair and helplessness in this work so brilliantly I hate it took me so long to finally be able to read it! Excellent work!

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Nice stuff...heart wrenching...could have been more economical towards the end...objective correlative would be mor effecive than pouring your thoughts directly. What say?

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

Honey, this piece is written immaculately.

I have issues with the modern world and it is all to do with judgement and weakness, we judge so quickly (using others opinions as sway) and are not strong enough to do our own thing. This is in every aspect of the world, and most definately shown in this piece.

I do not pass on with the crowd, and for this I receive ridicule (sp), why is this? how did we get this lost?

This is a brilliant piece of work honey, descriptive artistry at its finest.

Mx

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Oh my dear friend you know just how to tug at the heart strings, this is such a sad piece knowing that it is true. Ashamed we should all bow our heads in shame cause I think we all have turned the blind eye on something like that before.

Brilliantly written in a very disturbing way, eye opener to say the least!

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

This is heart breaking. You wrote this with incredible passion and lucidity and were right to the point, no excessive wording and I like that. I suppose if this is a common sight, people just sort of take it for granted, like we tend to think when we see the homeless on the streets with the signs, "Will work for food."

Is it common in India to see this? I don't think I would be able to pass. This mother's heart had to be breaking...A very powerful write!



Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

this is unfortuantely so sadly true...
people needing help and yet everyone just passing them by

i dont think there is anything i can say that is not already said...
just wanted to say that it is so sadly true that this is happening everyday

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

This is stunning! You've given this picture great justice. It's very sad when we see something so real, and yet we automatically want to disguard it as not. We want to say, I didn't really see that. You've done this woman and her child justice. Very well done!

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Great, great piece of writing here. One of the most painfully descriptive pieces I've read in a minute. And the plight of our people is worsened, only by the flight of the rest.

Dope, dope piece.

Posted 16 Years Ago


2 of 2 people found this review constructive.

" The Outlaws Song" was a brilliant review, of a brilliant piece. We all have been in that situation. There's so many con artists, so many mentally ill, who may attack, so many stories that would require enormous time. Someone else will help. I have been homeless, and on the street, I know the lame games played. But, there is also a brutal truth to some, a desperate hopelessness. This was an excellent write. Publishable. Rain..

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.

Well thought out and nicely written. I'm a bit confused between this being a half a poem and half a vivid description of what you saw. That doesn't take away the impact of the words just that some of it could have a more poetic feel. Perhaps, because of the disturbing nature of the work, you wanted to avoid this.

I guess because the world moves so fast these days people don't have time to stop and consider others and their feelings and thoughts. To leave someone to their death is quite horrific and certainly in a one on one situation impossible to imagine. However I think sometimes when we want to, disappearing into a crowd is the easiest option and less hassle.

Good piece of writing.

Posted 16 Years Ago


3 of 3 people found this review constructive.


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Added on May 25, 2008
Last Updated on May 25, 2008

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Floating on the feathers of a dandelion
Floating on the feathers of a dandelion

Underneath blueeeeeeeeee sky, India



About
Hmmm.... About me ?!?!? I am what i would have wanted myself to be, i am a butterfly when i want to tickle the flowers, i am a bird when i want to compete with the flecks of cotton, i am the river whe.. more..

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