oceans and sunflowers

this is not a um. an immediate thing that happened recently. the first poem i posted is about this heartbreak, but this was written at the peak of my pain. last throwback writing i'll post

some say that giving your heart away
is the bravest thing you can do.
i’ve done it twice.
the feeling is nice,

when you first step into those waters,
but eventually those waters turn to ice
people move away, things change, people change
people change,
feelings change.
and you’d think

i would’ve learned by now
to stop allowing people to come into my life and leave
just to take away parts of me that i didn’t even believe could be taken and so now,

i’m stuck
stuck with half a heart, 

hypothetically torn apart
limb from limb
yet still, 

i swim through these waters that i am the only one to blame for being in.

i can’t see the shore anymore.
i was so lost in the feeling of weightlessness
that came with being swept away by the current
and i knew these feelings weren’t going to last forever
yet still,
i willingly, and happily, 

stepped into your arms and when you let go,

i realized
i didn’t know how to keep myself afloat.
because how does one keep oneself afloat,
when the person they love the most,
leaves them to fend for themselves,
in an ocean of “i love you"s that weren’t tainted at the start
but faded into the dark,
because the person they loved

had a change of heart.

but i need you to know that this doesn’t mean i don’t love you.
i always have,

i always will.
you were the tallest sunflower in my garden, but you wilted, 

and i am sorry.

but believe me when i say that i tried my f*****g hardest to preserve your colors
and keep you from turning gray
but sometimes,
the people you love the most
are the people who can’t be saved.

Reviews

[Esther]

this is so good oh my gosh

[Maestro]

Your words paint a picture vividly, it makes me reflect my own experience

[YanZeros]

"Sometimes, the people you love the most are the people who can’t be saved." This is very true and I can relate to this poetry. Keep the heart healing, take care.