The Next Room, Reflections from John's Front Porch

I sat on a wrought iron bench, with flowered cushions, on John’s deck and watched Baxter, my rambunctious terrier dash about the yard in great excitement. I looked out at the scene before me. Flowers,"rhododendrons, lavender, and azaleas, stretched across the front of the yard. Beyond it stretched his mowed field of dry grass, dotted here and there with yellow dandelions. It was about the size of a football field, bordered by a tall evergreen forest. Crows flew over the trees and once, a flock of geese flew overhead. Farther in the distance, mountains, green with trees, rose toward the sky.  It was Labor Day weekend and my grand kids were gone with their aunt and uncle. John and I were enjoying several days alone together in his Mossyrock home.

Usually, John sits on the little bench with me, but his white fluffy Pomeranian, Abby, had finished her demure stroll around the property and had gone back inside. He had fixed himself a protein shake, blended with a banana, something the doctor had suggested to get some extra calories and protein after a recent stomach problem.

Now, he was relaxing in his easy chair, drinking his healthy drink. We’re sort of like an old married couple, but that’s ok. We’ve been together a lot this weekend. Besides, he’s just in the next room. The minute I had that thought, a memory came to me. I was a teenager. I’d loved a boy named Harvey for two years and Harvey had joined the army, after some personal struggles. Off they shipped him, a nineteen year old boy, for combat in Vietnam. Now he was dead. I grieved him desperately.

My friend Jessica had walked with me down the main street of Vancouver, Washington to visit his body in the funeral home. We’d noticed an office with a sign in the front: Christian Science. Jessica said, “They believe in mind over matter. Maybe they can make Harvey come back to life.” I brightened. Why not go in and ask. It didn’t occur to me that if they could do that, lots of people would be making the same request.

We walked in and sat on a comfortable couch. A staff person sat on a nearby chair. “How can I help you?” she asked kindly.

“Can you bring my boyfriend Harvey to life? He was killed in Vietnam and his body is at a nearby funeral home.”

“If Harvey were in the next room,” would that make you feel better?”

“Yes,” I answered hesitantly. But would I be able to go in the room and see him?

“You can’t see him right now,” she explained, “but he’s not far away.”

That did not satisfy me. My religious upbringing taught me that people go to Heaven at death and that we’d see them when our lives ended. But I was only seventeen. Hopefully, I would live a long life. How could I wait so long?

Gradually, I accepted Harvey’s absence in my life. Then I met and married Tom. Now Tom was in the next room too. Or, as he related in a song he’d written, he was “on the other side”.

I was glad that John was in a real next room, not a metaphorical one. I got up and went into the house. He moved to the couch to sit by me and watch a movie. During the commercials, we hugged and kissed. What a gift, after love losses, to have him, a kind, handsome, wonderful man right there.

Reviews

[Samuel Dickens]

This one has a strong emotional effect on me--the era, losses of Vietnam and such. Like all of your writing, it's smooth, easy to read, and honest as Abe Lincoln. I've long wondered if we get to see loved ones on the other side. That would surely be magnificent.

[Shelley Warner]

Yes, it would be magnificent. I hope so too. Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts with me.

[barleygirl]

In your profile blurb, you seem to be a little judgmental about your tendency to write about your life. I write about my life all the time & I don't think it's narcissistic (to me, that's a pretty harsh word). I find my stories about real life are much more enjoyed than the ones I make up. Same with my own reading habits. I love reading about real life & I find fiction boring. So write on & don't be apologetic about writing in a way that lots of people do & lots of people enjoy! You do it well. Your writing is clear & compelling & full of interesting details. Also, you do setting description well (((HUGS)))

[Shelley Warner]

Wow, thank you for that encouragement to keep writing about my life. I like that you mention my setting descriptions. That's something I work at.