Hello?

Voicemail: Hi sorry I could'nt answer please leave a message!

.......................................................................................................................

 

I can't take it anymore, this one way street all you and no me

It's like inhaling water but living in a desert of sand

Dryness seeps in until it's all bled out

Leaving you empty without a doubt

 

So take a step back and really look at me

Am I still the same or maybe you've lost the key

Can you feel the pain from the inside out?

Or should I tell you what this is all about?

 

Someday you're gonna know what it's like

To sit here, dying, holding the knife

Every thought going through that one way vein

You're pulse moving like a run-away train

 

You'll know the minute, you shut your eyes

That it was all a mistake, what a surprise

You better fall to your knees and get to praying

Each breath is weaker, what are you saying?

 

So take a step back and really look at me

Am I still the same or maybe you've lost the key

Can you feel the pain from the inside out?

Or should I show you what it's all about?

 

Would it hurt if I was gone forever?

Or is that something you could deal with?

Think about that for just a minute

Put just a little thought in it

 

Cause I'm saying these thoughts kill me

All the time these memories fill me

And the past comes back to show me

That these monsters will always own me

 

So take a step back and really look at me

Am I still the same or maybe you've lost the key

Can you feel the pain from the inside out?

All the way through without a doubt?

 

.................................................................................................................................

 

Hi, uh yeah it's me just calling to talk. I guess you're busy. Get back to me when you can. Bye.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Author's Note

What do you think about it??

Reviews

[Mr.Cardigan]

thumbs ups

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

hmm i like it..it is filled with a lot of emotion and I like the rhyming but one line you broke the rhyming pattern. But it is hard to always find the right words...it is still a good poem. I liked your idea of setting the scene with leaving a message and the person is filled with all these thoughts and emotions, it's an interesting piece.

Good Job

[sheila.j]

Thank you and yeah i can see where i broke the rhyme i was having a hard time finding the right word to show what i meant while keeping the rhyme

[~*~Peace Keeper~*~]

Yeah it's understandable...I have done that many times before lol

[M. Kier McCarey]

Interesting concept.

[RachelReaper]

the last line added the right amount of sass and irony. Throughout I really like the rhymes that you did, which is a really great thing because finding the right rhyme to go where can be rather difficult.

[sheila.j]

thanks!!