the villian

He lurkes within

the deepest part

and leaves his own spin

on my heart

 

afraid of what lives in his eyes

he ignores my pleas and cries

 

I run from him to no avail

into the dark where i cant see

he wants to sentence me to jail

he captures me and sets me free

Reviews

[M. View]

I feel the same way it could be deeper then what you put down it like a bainstorm that you could add so much more too.

[masie]

hmm.. i dont feel like this poem is quite finished yet. i like how it rhymes and i like how you worded the first sentence. imagery is outstanding. and i like the last line also... he captures me and sets me free....
but i think you could add a little more to it. but kudos