Scarecrow. (100 words)

First there is innocence, then life happens

Veena hitchhiked a school bus to court that day. The same bus she took daily many years ago. The court would declare her ‘single’ and she didn’t want to miss even a second of it. The children gasped for a moment, at the mask that she had made of her scarf.

Only for a moment before they got back smiling, laughing, playing and living life moment to moment. The glow in each of the eyes before her seemed alien, even though once upon a time, she had them too. She had stopped using her eyes to speak a long time ago. She moved to the middle of the bus, where she stood still like a scarecrow; an alien to her own past. 

The end

Reviews

[KWP]

yes, well it only happens if you allow it right? To see the world with a childs eyes is the only vision to have :)

For a 100 words story I think you have done a fine job. I have often wondered how Muslim women feel about making this transition. You have left it open ended, for the reader to make up their own minds about things. I like it - well done X

[Ashwin Shanker]

I didn't picture the protagonist as Muslim, sorry if I gave out the wrong message, though I understand how you would have come to this conclusion.
Thank you for the nice review KWP.

[KWP]

In the picture - there’s a muslim lady :)

[Ashwin Shanker]

She is just a lady wearing a scarf that covers her face. Doesn't actually qualify her as a muslim.

[KWP]

okay if you say so but it pretty much looks like a Niqab to me ... anyway I digress, her being muslim works very well in your story too - so well done.

[Anjali]

A short, story with a beautiful message. Nicely written.

[richieb]

You told your story well. It was a joy to read about the light in the children's eyes. We should never lose that ability to show our soul through our eyes.
Peace,
Richie b.

[Coyote Poetry]

A very good tale written. You gave life to the photo. I liked the honest tone leading to the good ending. Thank you for sharing the excellent poetry.

Coyote

[Riddhi]

Its a really good story..I never thought that in so much few words you can express something so powerfully...But this is an evidence of it..I really liked the entire concept behind it..It is actually story of so many women in india..Though it may seem quite odd to a foreigner but a common man in india , its normal..I want that the women in india should become now independent and powerful , so that this same story doesn't continues..
A wonderful write..
Keep on writing and thanks for sharing..

[Ms Paragon]

Great short story.So much said in only a few wordsIYou can follow this woman's story up to the present and only hope that after the court's declaration something will change for the best!Well done!

[Ashwin Shanker]

Thank you for the thoughtful review Ms. Paragon

[emipoemi]

You have a few linguistic/spelling errors ("missED" ; "now THEY only see"; "Now she used THEM to navigate..." (no "the"), but this is an incredible short story. It tells a novel of a tale in just a short time. Well done! Much enjoyed!

[Ashwin Shanker]

Thanks for pointing these out. Much appreciated

[emipoemi]

my pleasure.

[Ashwin Shanker]

See now. I have changed it.

[emipoemi]

....."eyes" are not "it" though, because you have two of them.....

[Ashwin Shanker]

Changed that too.