Letters of Marque

Capitan flints last voyage in to sunscar island!

Letters of Marque 

his captains coat blew in the wind, his eyes were cold and harsh, not a blink, nor a glance any direction but ahead, he was ready. the wind stung his face as it swept passed him.

"Avast ye! hoist the colors high! we have some Corsair's u'cumin" he shouted to his noble and true crew.

"aye cap'in! ye herd the man! step to it! on the double!" shouted first mate Abel.

in the center of their ship grew a small tree, next to that tree was the main mast, which flew the colors, their flag, the Eternity.

"HOLD!" shouted the captain.

"sir?"asked Abel.

"ready the canons" replied the captain.

"Flint what you got planned for these bilge-sucking codpieces?"

"dead men tale no tales master Abel" replied Captain Flint.

"Aye Sir!" saluted Abel excitedly.

as the enemy ship drew closer, the canons were released , each of the large metal contraptions were Triple barrel beasts of technology, ten on each side, and five in the front and four in the rear.

"Run a shot across the bow!" shouted Flint to his crew as he ran to the wheel of the ship. the shot was a warning to the enemy ship to not declare a battle with the crew of the Eternity. however, their warning was met with return fire, 

"Show no Quarter!!!" shouted Flint in an angry rage. the canons blew with great firepower, and the enemy ship did not have the time to reload before it was completely destroyed.

"captain what is our current heading?" asked Abel.

"Hard alee Master Abel!" commanded Flint with a grin across his face.

"sir? we will be travel'in at a snails pace" Abel replied confused.

"were we are going, the wind will not favor us, we are soon to be at Sunscar island." Announced Flint with his unique and trademark pirate grin across his face.

"sir sunscar island?" asked Abel.

"Aye, i'll be drop'in you and the crew off at port Saymin. then i will be off to sunscar. the military wont have this ship in their grasps Master Abel." explained the captain as he left the deck and retreated down to the captains chambers. it was a large room with polished bamboo flooring, the captains desk was built into the flooring and next to his desk was his blade, the blood red Persian cutlass, the first treasure that Flint had ever found, it never lost its edge, and in the hands of only the most noble captains it would feel weightless, but in the hands of one who was not meant to hold it, it weight as much as a hundred blades. the black onyx handle was smooth and shined like the stars them-self. 

the captain sat at his desk, and picked up the summons from the military in england. the letters of marque, although it seemed like it would be a choice, if he did not reply he and his crew would be ravenously hunted by the armada of the English military. Lord Barkus saw himself as the commander of the new seas. 

ever since the great flood of 2220, the entire continent of the Americas was submerged, and now nearly all of the land mass that once was, is now sea, thus pirate-iring has returned, and in the two-hundred years of it being as it once was the military has also became as corrupt and ill-supervised as it once was.

the military higher ups saw pirates as cheap hands, and some would go for it, others would try to run, but they were eventually gunned down.

Flint looked at the papers, knowing that they signaled the end of his pirate career, but he would not let the military destroy nor take his beloved ship,  the Eternity had a hold on Flint, it was a very powerful ship no doubt, but Flint believed that it was a ship that would link destinies, and sow him into the fabric of history forever.

they soon reached port Saymin, as they did Flint announced his final goodbye to the crew of the eternity, and he was off to Sunscar island, were he would drink his last bottle of rum, and chase it with a bottle of sleeping death, a painless poison which forces you to sleep then it kills you.

he soon reached Sunscar island, were i laid anchor in a well hidden cave, the island was nearly impossible to get to, he figured that anybody who could get to the ship and take her from this cave, would deserve it and all of the treasure aboard, which would only be the blood vein (his sword) and the tree that grew in the center of the ship, though it was only a sapling at the moment, it would one day be large and bear what was called the hybrid fruit of eden, this fruit would give the eater energy and nutrients, and it was said that the flavor was never the same.

above the cave was a hole, it was much like a sky light, he sat at his desk with a bottle of rum in one hand and the vile of sleeping death in the other.

"yo ho ho, and a bottle of rum!" he shouted as he took his last sip of rum, and quickly drained the bottle of poison. 

then, the most feared captain in all twenty seas, died the most peaceful death there was in these times.

                                     the end

Author's Note

im thinking of makeing this a prequil to a book but idk if this is any good.

Reviews

[Anthony M Smith Jr]

Yarr! Thar she blows! Yeah, good beginning to a story. My son waits for the rest, he is a pirate follower guess it is better than vampires. He always asks me if there were any good pirates.
TT-TTO-NI-K
Elk

[Ashley]

its very good it would be an amazing prologue for a book :)

[C.T. Bailey]

I like it. I am assuming this is an unmassaged draft, therefore I am sure you are aware of some the grammar and spelling errors. I think this would be a good foundation for a prologue. One thing I would suggest is a little less dialouge and quite a bit more descriptive writing. This is farily standard in a prologue, especially one of historic ficition. I do this by closing my eyes and visualizing the scene. I take note of the minor, peripherial items in the scene, the colors, the odors, the sounds, etc. Go into deep detail. Then gradually introduce your dialogue into the scene. It is important to pace it. I love historical fiction and Ithink you are well on your way! Nice job!

[Zeitgeist Manifesto]

You really did a good job of fleshing out the characters. The action was theatrical and easily imagined in my mind. The flow of the story moved along very nicely.

[ShaneBerry]

tell me what grammar problems there are pleas? i obviously cant see them other wise they wouldnt b there. and how is it corney?

[Marlena]

I like it, but the grammar issues take away from it, and some of the pirate dialogue seemed...i don't know, a little corny. Just fix it up and it'll be perfect :)

[Tony]

The author here has a great imagination and is not afraid to use it.
Muy interesante!
Now, the bad part:
Your grammar needs some work, I know that doesn't seem that important, but it is.
I would say your work would look cleaner if you relax a little.
A futuristic, apocalyptic novel with characters who look like Mad Max and talk like Captain Morgans crew is a cool idea.
Think of the possibilities!

[SamBug]

I enjoyed this. You had everything written just perfectly. I liked how you had the characters talk perfectly like they were supposed to. You had their language pinned right down to the point. It was perfect and the story was so intriguing.