The Invisible Line

Ambitious by birth, I came to become an entirely self-made business tycoon. Trade to Asia was a booming business in the 70s’ and I, being a natural leader, quickly excelled in this field. Soon, Charles Seymour was known as an extremely wealthy businessman, the soul of high-class parties and gatherings and a man with enviable influence and power.

 

 My first ship, to which I owned part-ownership, imported spices from India to Britain. The ship was in a condition of desolation and being tight on budget, it was sent with only the indispensable refurbishment. Luck was besides me, for the ship brought great riches to me which aided me in my later investments. Soon, I became aggressive in my dealings and was known as a hardcore man of money, a person to reach his ends- by hook or by crook.

 

By the early 80s’ I was raking in gold but still my thirst was not satiated. I desired more, I desired complete monopoly, and I was a power-hungry man. The impossible dream of winning the earth was not inconceivable to me, only challenging.  Soon I spread my nets even farther and when business was low, I set for means so despicable that even their thoughts bring a fresh wave of shame and guilt over me. When other ship owners were tightening their purses and preparing for rainy days, I dared to differ. I involved in drug dealings, lending my ship to the whims of those drug lords who promised easy money with little effort.

 

And so I went, until my riches grew beyond belief but still my vile desire was not quenched. Soon I involved in far more sinister activities including arms export and false currency dealings. The fire still burnt in me, intent on taking me on a par with God Himself. And it was then that reality crashed on this shrunken soul of evil.

 

One of my employees, I don’t know which one, must have caught a whiff of the fishy business going on in my ships. The very day before a particularly huge shipment to Rio de Janeiro, on 12^th March 1889, the fateful day that I should never forget, the police came crashing through my door and demanded a raid. Declared guilty without hesitance by a disgusted judge, Charles Seymour was taken to jail for lifelong imprisonment. Maybe I should have been thankful to have avoided the electric chair or the gas chamber after what I’d done, but there was not a drop of remorse in me. But now, with the going years, as the tides dull the jagged cliff, I have understood my mistake. I should have turned back in time, respected my limits and reconsidered those foolish decisions. Now that I have my remaining life to regret my stupidity, I finally understand that I crossed it, the line of destruction and the limit of man’s sins. I had crossed God’s Invisible line.

 

Author's Note

please be kind on this, i wrote it when I was 13, as an inexperienced writer and a fairly God-fearing kid. Though still, pointing out grammar mistakes and other errors will be really appreciated :)

Reviews

[Lorraine]

"Luck was besides me�" ==== "Luck was beside me�"

Well, that's the only thing I noticed.

For a thirteen years old, this piece is amazingly written. I admit I wasn't much into writing when I was only thirteen. In fact this is way better as compared to what I could have written when I was that young.

I like this story. The concept is totally awesome. It started out as a hardcore biography of a person's business ventures, but I like the way you ended it with a realization. It was fast-paced. Every sentence talks of something important that made the story good in totality. Very spiritual. I hope those in prisons would also realize their mistakes and repent for them. Good Job.

Keep Writing. ^___^