marionette

i am nothing but a doll on a string.

letting you do the work,

i am but a few chunks of wood.

eyes of glass with a painted face.

is this any way to live?

i dance for your pleasure,

to see your beautiful smile.

i am yours to do with what you want.

but take advantage of this,

because i wont be here forever.

i will cut these strings,

the ones that bound me to you.

i will be a real girl,

with real feelings.

but i will be for someone else.

Reviews

[R.W. Blue]

Except for the capitalization, the poem worked it's own magic. Some of the words were just a bit too simple and nearly didn't work, but with the help of some spin on language, you managed to salvage this. Try to use words that have more rhythm and feeling so the mood can be set in a stronger way. It wasn't smooth, but you still created quite an interesting poem.