Sat'yr of Dreams

A state of agony ......

Desperate of words....

I had been through a notion of love......

Bewildering passion that crept deep inside

Paddling in and in...

With out thee

Hue of cries and despise....

Alluring thoughts of solitude....

In darkest dreams there had been a gratitude 

But in the slightest awakening i left my soul....

oh!!!! you always been in the darkest and the lightest ....O.....all

Feathery wings had brought the altruism all the way

Beckoning me always brings you the brightest bay....

I had been in all your feel...

As you do ......

The torrent winds that made the stride......

The plethora of mind which i always hide.....

Being a  sat'yr of the dreams....flying high and high ...

   

Author's Note

Hope i had justified with my trail version

Reviews

[KatiePie]

This was a beautiful write on your part, and it provided as an enjoyable read for me. I loved the whole thing and from the first line your every word pulled me in and compelled me to keep reading. Gorgeous.
-Cathrine

[Randy`s Princess]

very emotive and wonderfully written nice job well done

[HorrorMaster]

wow very good

[zombiikillah666]

wow. this is good

[Ruth]

A powerful poem sweet!
Agony, not an easy emotion to write about, you have succeeded well!
xx

[Coyote Poetry]

Poem is amazing. You took me on a field trip with your words. Your use of language brought me in and the strong lines made the poem stronger. I like the complete poem. The ending was outstanding. Thank you.
Coyote

[Abdul Aziz]

While the vocabulary was good, I feel the poem was a bit disjointed. The thoughts were incongruent at times, and the use of informal punctuation was a bit distracting. I'd say, avoid the punctuation, and trim the write. But, as a famous quote goes, "A poem should not mean, but be". This does have a deeper meaning, but it is meandering close to the borderline between meaning and being, atleast in my opinion ;)

The plus points are that I like the diction, and the imagery. I believe tucking away a few excesses here and there will make this a good poem!

Good effort, keep writing. For writing more is the only way to get better :)

P.S. First line should be "Desperate for words"

[SamBug]

I do believe This was a very good poem!!!!

[ScarlettTheDreamer]

Nice poem but you don't have to include ..... So much.... See even i'm doing it now.... And that doesn't look good does it?

[Dinesh Sairam]

This was like a prayer song and almost perfect. Only thing lacking is the absence of a rhyme scheme or a theme. You can always edit them ;) The wordings were awesome. Keep writing. Welcome to Writer's Cafe :)