Don't make the same mistakes

A dark poem about hiding your pain, and making mistakes in life.

Don't pull that s**t on me! you're not as bad as you could be.

But instead, you hide your feelings, you lie to me.

I see your pain,

I see your hurt,

you cover it up but it doesn't work.

you pretend to be shy, but it's not you.

you're special, loud,excited, almost high.

and it hurts me so badly, to see you so blue.

but you hide, you cry, behind closed doors, while others turn a blind eye.

I know I'll never understand, but I myself am living a lie.

the world is fake, we all know this to be true, we pretend in every single thing we do.

we put on a face, watch, and we wait,

to come out of our shell, and escape the hate

But the time never comes.

I've played the game and covered it up, 

it's just the same it works for a minute, maybe two.

I hide with jokes and cover it like most, but all it is; is an un-welcome host.

I watch, I wait hoping the pain will fade away.

but nope! it's here to stay.

it works for a minute, maybe two, but sooner or later,

it comes breaking through;

creeping in, like unwanted sin, and it's here to stay. 
"I don't want to play!"

it's killing me. can't you see?

it sneaks in like a bad dream.

breaking me down, breaking me down, slowly, slowly.

I don't want to wallow in it, but it's dark and bleak.

I feel so hollow with it

why can't i sleep?

it makes me weak, and as I drift off with a dream I feel as if i'm falling into an empty pit.

I feel it. Breaking me down, Breaking me down; like wet sand on hollow ground.

In my dreams I hear the sound, of footsteps following me;

they're watching me, taunting me, waiting for me to lose grip on reality.

I work hard, just to stand steady, I lie and say "i'm ready"

"slow down, Balance it out. Don't let the others hear you shout.

"they wont understand what you're about."

Mercy only gets me so far, eventually, I'm back there depressed and lonely.

but it creeps back in!... Slowly Slowly,

and by the time it's back, it's too late.

I've already fallen back into my depressed state.

please don't make the same mistake?

Author's Note

It was actually the very first poem I ever wrote. It was free hand and I'm aware there are plenty of errors. It was mostly to keep myself busy. My teacher challenged me to do it because she believed it would help get my feelings out.

Reviews

[Dee]

This poem is a beautiful painting. It is a jewel sparkling in a ray of light. This poem is the beginning of a rich, and satisfying journey. Great job, thanks for sharing your poem.

[luvs2write]

The emotion was so powerful in this poem. It was so relatable...I feel like a lot of us are "living a lie" as you put it. It seems like the world never forgives you if you show who you really are. You did an amazing job, keep writing