When Day was Done

When day was done

and dusk drew near

there was a golden hour

When sunlight kissed 

for one last time

each yellow-petaled flower

And all the dunes

were set ablaze

The grass was cloaked in fire

And on my skin

the last rays danced

to a tune of my desire

I sat there

For a little while

Under a violet dome

If ever I had lost my way

I now had found my home

Reviews

[emmajoygreen]

One.. two.. three years ago and so few reviews, people must be blind or wanting to watch TV or make a cuppa tea!

'And all the dunes
were set ablaze
The grass was cloaked in fire
And on my skin
the last rays danced
to a tune of my desire '

How visual, how melodic.. Seems to me it was worth being lost to find that place.. .. and stay there.

[Relic]

I like the scenes you describe. Show don't tell, they say. You did that here skillfully. I could see what you were saying. Sun is good. Dusk is nice. The glow is memorable. :)

[Paul Shannon]

I particularly like the second stanza, sounds almost biblical. Good stuff

[emipoemi]

how no one has yet commented on this is astounding - this is A - freaking - Mazing! The flow is divine, the narrative simply golden, the progression is gorgeous! Delectably scrumptious! Well done!

[.:Arianna:.]

Thank you so much!!

[emipoemi]

my pleasure.