A Heart Worth Saving

Nothing's too broken...

Open your eyes.
Open your eyes and take a look at the world
See the color in the skies, and the trees, and the beauty of life.
--It's not as dark as you pictured it.

Open your ears.
Open your ears and listen to the sounds around you
Hear the birds chirp their happy song and the wind move freely.
--It's not as eerie as you imagined it.

Open your hands.
Open your hands and feel the warmth of living
Run your fingers through the blades of grass as the summer breeze gently brushes your face.
--It's not as cold as you remembered it.

Now open your mind...
Open your mind and let me in, let me ease your burden
Let me calm your troubled heart
And show you a world.
Show you a world that is not so filled with pain and grief
That is not so broken and helpless,
--That it cannot be saved...
Everything can be saved as long as it's worth saving,
---So let me start with your heart.

I know it's been broken for quite awhile.
I know it's been wounded so many times
That you think it better to throw it away,
--Than to try and repair the damage.
But I know otherwise..
I see a heart so precious, so beautiful
That I gave up my own
--To start working on yours.
I see a person so magnificent, so spectacular
That I no longer care to live
--If you're not there with me.
I see an angel who was wounded.
--Wounded by the very souls who claimed to love her
And was thrown to the wolves to fend for herself.
--But I will be your guardian,
If you let me.

I could show you a world
A world of beauty and bliss.
A world of peace and love.
A world where you don't always have to look over your shoulder,
--wondering who will hurt you next.
Yes, I could show you that world.

But first you would have to see me.

Author's Note

Just more emotions flowing out of me. Hope you like it

Reviews

[Marianne Rose]

I love this poem, partly a message to all of us, partly a message to a loved one who you offer so much to if eyes, mind, hands and heart are open. There is beauty in the world- we forget to look around and see it. When love visits you, there are the eyes to see that hope and new beginning that is possible. I love the last line, definitely the twist that makes the whole piece come together as a whole. Thank you so much for sharing this- it helps me to turn my own eyes away from the dark perception that has taken over almost everyone around me, and usher in hope, peace and love again.

[Darian B.]

I'm glad it helps, she gave me a different perspective in life and I want everyone, especially her, to see the world in a brighter perspective. I have trouble looking at the world in a bright way too though. The world just tears us down so much, we have to actively work to see beauty in it. I really am happy that you like the poem though, your reviews mean a lot!

[Black Jess]

Oh My God !!! I think it's the best poem i've ever read . everything you said i imagined it and i imagined myself in it and i felt the moment like when you said :''Run your fingers through the blades of grass as the summer breeze gently brushes your face. '' and ''Hear the birds chirp their happy song and the wind move freely. '' and ''See the color in the skies, and the trees, and the beauty of life. '' i felt like i'm in nature and Now I see the world from a different perspective . this is so well written

[Darian B.]

Wow, Thank you so much! I'm really glad you liked it, my soul goes into these poems and it always cheers me up to hear that people like them! New perspectives are great in life, I'm glad I could give you one, you made my day! :)

[Black Jess]

I like the positive vision of yours about this world , it's not that bad , it's not that painfull . if we close our eyes and open our minds , we will see the hidden beauty in this world , we will realize that there is no sadness without happiness , or cry without laughter ...there is goodness in this world we just don't see it , and we should see it !

[Darian B.]

I try to keep this view always but it can be so hard some days. I just have to realize evil and hatred will always be present on this earth and it will always yell over the good but the good is still there, even if it speaks softly and is drowned out by the evil. We just have to hang in and find happiness in the hard to reach places

[Black Jess]

Good is wise , that's why it speaks softly and that's why evil yell at it ! And about the haters and evil , you're right , they will never disappear in this world , but we can make them disappear in our own world by ignoring them ;) fighting Darian ^•^

[Lyn Anderson]

this is a lovely piece. If only the one we love could truly see.

[Darian B.]

I tell myself that every day, thank you for the review!

[Tessa Melendez]

A beautiful, beautiful piece. I felt it in my heart. This is so sweet and romantic...I love it. If someone wrote something like this for me, I'd be in happy tears. Some of those lines fit me perfectly, actually....

There are only two little minor tweaks I think you should make: 1) Right after the line "--To start working on yours." in that second to last stanza, press enter so you can make another. (You don't really NEED to do this, but it feels right to me since the stanza went so long and after that line it feels like there should be a space for breath or pause.) 2) In the line "And thrown to the wolves to fend for herself" Perhaps you should put a "was" in there so it goes "--Wounded by the very souls who claimed to love her/And thrown to the wolves to fend for herself."

A great piece, fellow poet. I love it!

[Darian B.]

Thank you, I wish I could show this to the person I made it for, but for some reason, we grew incredibly distant and it kills me. If these things describe you though, hang in there and don't be down on yourself. You have an amazing talent for writing and that means a lot of things. It means you are thoughtful, smart, creative, and a lot of other good traits. I know the vast majority of us guys are absolute jerks but someone will come around who truly feels this way about you.

As for the tweaks: I'm going to leave number 1 the way it is because this is designed as a somewhat spoken-word poem and so there is a specific way I say it and I've tailored the stanzas to that way. The dashes are actually where I take places to breath, they signal a pause. With number 2, where did you want me to put the "was?" Your lines didn't end up including it but it is something that I could consider

Thank you for the kind review, I'm really glad you love it!

[Tessa Melendez]

Oh. I meant for you to put the "was" in between the "And" and the word "thrown" so the line would go: "And was thrown to the wolves to fend for herself".

[jacob erin-cilberto]

when we have preconceived notions..the world looks different and sometimes just plain ugly...but take those glasses off and look with natural eyes and an open mind...

and we can see much of what we are missing that is good.
and every heart is worth saving.
j.

[Darian B.]

Definitely true, every heart is worth saving. I just wish i could save the one closest to me. Thank you for the words, it means a lot

[H.L. Cerveise]

I love this poem. I agree with William when he said the repetition worked well in this poem. I also liked very much the "open your..." I liked the cadence that gave this poem. I see the word you used instead of "broken" that William made a comment about. I think using the word "eerie" is a good pick. When I think of that word, I think of darkness. You have penned another great poem.

Well done.

[Darian B.]

Thank you! I really am glad you like it, and it's good you like eerie because it's probably going to be the word that stays. I can't find the word I'm really looking for. I'm truly grateful for William and your reviews though, they mean the world to me

[William Liston]

When I read your poem "Pandora's Box," I thought you wouldn't write a poem better than that for a while. It wasn't because I wasn't confident in your skills or anything like that, but rather, it was because "Pandora's Box" was a damn good poem. Then I read this....

Darian, I applaud you. This was amazing. The repetition in this poem was amazing, it actually intensified the poem's poem's emotion impact. When you kept repeating "open your ___" I swear my heart began to melt. The imagery in this poem was simple, yet very impactful. Then at the end when you said "But first you would have to see me" I was like DAMN. You did great, Darian.

The only thing I can critique is the last line of the second stanza. I've never heard sound described as "broken" before. In stanzas identical to that one (stanzas one and three) you use a word to describe the sense you're appealing to. For example, you described a sight as "dark" and something felt as "cold." But when I think of a horrible sound, the word "broken" doesn't come to mind. Even though I can't think of another word to use, I'd suggest trying to find another one.

-William Liston

[Darian B.]

Geez, thank you so much! I really just write how I feel, so it's good to know that my feelings mean something. With the second stanza but, I see what you mean. When I wrote those first three stanzas, I was trying to imply the world and I think I still may have done that, just in relation to the sense I was describing in each respective stanza. I changed it to eerie for now, but I'm going to keep looking for a word that better captures what I am trying to say. Thank you though for the kind review and for the continual help on my poems. You have better allowed me to describe the way I feel and that's what I want my poems to do. Thank you!

[William Liston]

You're welcome. I can't think of a single word to describe a horrible sound. So...good luck finding one.