Invisible Man

Invisible Man

 

Am I invisible?

Or am I just fine

I’ve noticed

 I’m being unnoticed

Is it all just in my mind?

 

Your disrespect is detectable

Am I misreading the signs?

Overlooked and under-appreciated

Maybe you’re the one who’s blind.

 

Not seeing me for who I am

And keeping my light confined

But hiding a star in the dark

Will only increase its shine

 

There are too many who are unseen

Disregarded and ignored

I hope they heed my transparency

And these words strike a chord  

 

Because the world is full of ghosts

With their heads in the sand

A visual all too visible

Only seen by an invisible man

Reviews

[lovejulez03]

This was a wonderful read. Very well written and I read it several times - it struck home for me. The feeling and sincerity jumped out at me. "Not seeing me for who I am/And keeping my light confined/But hiding a star in the dark/Will only increase its shine" - beautiful and simple. Well done my friend!

[Sirius King]

thank you Julez, i appreciate that!

[lovejulez03]

Anytime!

[Mark]

very nice flow to this. Well done. :)

[Sirius King]

thank you Mark!

[Brandon S. Whitten]

A write many can relate to, even I or is it me?:P Brilliantly penned and excellent read.

[Sirius King]

thanks Brandon!

[Parsimony]

What first seems like self-centredness views becomes a worldly observation. Nice transition.

[Sirius King]

thank u!

[KAin]

Excellent work, Serenus.
Your third stanza reminds me of Machiavelli's quote:
"Everyone sees what you appear to be. Few experience what you truly are."
I guess the parts of us that are the most honest things about us are also the most vulnerable. Perhaps that which is invisible are the things we're either too afraid to show, or too vulnerable to expose?
No one ever sees the real you, all of you. In that way, we are invisible, I suppose. Unable or unwilling to be seen.
Great poem.

[Sirius King]

i total agree, thank u for a great review.

[dw817]

⊰ℛℛ⊱

You just described my life in Elementary, Middle, and High School and shame on you for following me secretly and taking notes on it ! *Grin*

No, that's fine. Many times I wished I =WAS= invisible, especially when being stalked by bullies, running into a bathroom only to find more there waiting for me. Never good.

Once again, a well-written piece, Serenus, but your Big Bad Wolf still takes the cake !!

Oh, BTW, I'm gonna make a post that features what =I= think is some of the best writing. And so far it's a pretty small. Obviously your Big Bad Wolf is gonna go in there and a few others, but maybe out of 10% or less of what I've seen, read, and reviewed so far.

Hoping you get your badge for 1500 points. Hang in there !

[Sirius King]

thanks dw!

i'm sorry you went thru that in school, kids that age really suck!
read morethanks dw!

i'm sorry you went thru that in school, kids that age really suck!

...and thats for the features in advance!

[Sirius King]

thanks*

[dw817]

It's okay - I'm seeing a therapist - for life. I'm not joking about that. I see him every Wednesday and we talk about what they did, in fact you'll see me writing that in my blog eventually. Wednesday, going to see the doctor. And yes, that age really sucks - yet - I could've done something to help, if I only wasn't so afraid of them back then. Take care and looking forward to seeing your next writing !

[Sirius King]

we all could use some therapy, right?

:-)

[dw817]

Yeaffers. My Mom for one. :D Take care ...

[Sirius King]

:-))

u2!

[Baby Ricochet]

A poem of being anonymous with an undercurrent of dignity with just a hint of greatness. Outstanding work Serenus. Standing ovation

[Baby Ricochet]

You should make this your featured piece. Yes it's that good

[Sirius King]

wow, thanks BR...will do!

[Peter H]

a ponderous piece , excellently conveyed through the metaphor of the invisible man :)

[Sirius King]

thank u Peter!

[Sami Khalil]

A splendid read and write...:)

[Sirius King]

thank u Sami!

[Sami Khalil]

My pleasure...:)

[Sirius King]

:-)

[Sami Khalil]

^^~^^ :)

[s y e]

"But hiding a star in the dark
Will only increase its shine"

I see everyone else has commented on this line and I totally agree, that was an amazing line! I'd give you a thousand points just for that line if I could, haha. Amazing job!

~ Noodle.

[Sirius King]

thank u for the thousand points! lol

thanks Noodle :-)

[John Dennis Gillespie]

"Hiding a star will only increase its shine" I love that line. I love this poem, honestly, the conclusion, the introduction, the rhyme scheme everything. It's awesome.

[Sirius King]

thanx man, i appreciate you reading!