The Rise and Fall

A fictional compsite of a celebrity's fall, and the torment he endures

THE ATHLETE

In this morbid night, under these piercing stars, in the throws of the cities,
I sat, hunched over, shoulders slumped, unable to comprehend,
understand
the horror that has transpired.
At my own hands.
I lift them up, like MacBeth did his, not sure what to make of
of the what I did
tears fall down my face, I am mortified
of the life that I snuffed from me.
My heart is broken, beat laboriously 
in the middle of the cold jail cell floor.
My pride is shattered, and dashed to pieces
like crystal glass
I look to the sky and wail
What have I done?
this was not the way life was supposed to be --
I was the star
I was the athlete.

 

THE PEOPLE
When we first heard the news, we swayed on our feet.
are you sure, are you sure, it was he?
It was he.
When did this happen?
The afternoon, you see,
half-past three, right down the street
five times in the laundry room, was where
her life ended -- ended!
Where she did clothes for him, as she did
as any wife did for her beloved husband.
Numbness coursed through our veins as we sat in a daze
watching TV and tweeting and Facebooking the shock that shook us astray -
It was him? Are you sure?
Yes, he did. Five times she took a bullet in the laundry room
where no one knows what is true and what is false.

Burn him, crucify him some of us said.
No, crucifying is for the innocent to save others -
but let him rot in the cold cell he is now.
He once was risen, a risen gold star, symbol of hope and adversity
he was the athlete.
[the bullet in the chamber]

THE ATHLETE

On a fall day in October, when I was ten, a commercial maker spotted me at the kids' gym
 and told me I'd look good for a kid's shoe commercial
We got residuals.
When I was 17, I discovered the world of running
I sprinted, my first running shoes, like the wind, like a champion.
I competed - movie makers loved to star me
in films of adversity
For I knew of adversity - a father dead at 15, a mother struggling to raise me.
Heart attack took her
Learning disabilities scarred me, kids taunted me
(and down the trashcan I went, as they laughed)
but I thrived and survived, dashing my troubles away
 down the track -
the cameras flashing, the movies featuring me with leading ladies
They wanted to be with me
 And I let it go to my head
(see him on the runway, the movie awards)
I let it go to my head,
 even when I met my beloved, my wife.
Whom I would shoot that early night.
I rose
I became the symbol,
the icon
I became the bullet in the chamber

 

THE WIFE
And I loved him.
I knew the price of stardom, I knew as an actress myself, the pressure, the stress
but I loved to learn and I loved our two children
and although I did some things I wasn't proud of,
I never forgot my God.
By His grace,  I loved, I had something special for my husband
Clean the house, make it nice, love him, be his wife as I had,
That could only be expressed by giving him a home.
In the laundry.
No one ever speaks of me, just only as the victim.
But I was so much more
They only see my body, but don't see my soul.
I was a person
even in his rise.

 

THE DEFENSE:
And in his rise, he knew this. He only wanted what was best
The beauty of overcoming such adversity,
the beauty of an actor and athlete who runs like the wind.
The inspiration for children and adults
He must remain. It was purely an accident
Death threats pursued him he -- thought it was an intruder

THE PROSECUTION
But what about the arguments
Emergency recordings and a white barking dog.
Rants that reached the level of fear and the slamming of doors
as neighbors looked on
Or the bruise on her face
the divorce in the eyes,
the other women, the groupies
who flocked to his side
who met him after his movie shots by dusty hotels at night.
While his Other Half worried, their children by her side
When is daddy coming home, asked son and daughter
the night she went home, crying to her own father.
These point to his guilt, the motive so clear
We shall burn him at the stake, this choice is dear.

THE DEFENSE
But he stated so clearly it was truly a mistake
something he never intended
despite their rocky marriage, the love she still gave him
his wife, his rock, he worried of his safety
 the threats from others to kill him in a city--
infested with crime that plagues it and the nation
it is no wonder he armed himself with weapons. He felt the need
for protection
of himself, and his family
He just didn't know who was behind that laundry door,
until all shots were fired, only than did he understand
with remorse

THE PEOPLE
with remorse!
Yeah, right! No remorse, it was cold blood!
Blood-cold, ran in the streets like his heart.
He had it all, he was our star, our icon, and for a very few, their god.
He rose against adversity, challenged obstacles, actor, celebrity
athlete
The bullet in the chamber -
Until that night, that dreadful night -

When one who rose - fell that night.

THE ATHLETE
I fell that night,
dreadfully I fell that night.
The guards look at me with such ire, piercing eyes through my skin
like the soul of the devil staring down at me, into me
I shiver at the sound of the bars that slam tight,
the smell of urine from around the corner.
the calls of others cursed for their crimes.
The cold air that grips me at night.
I remember the days I strutted the walkway,
cameras shooting, people cheering, sport companies posting
my face on their billboards
my fame was their investment
my face was their entertainment
but that has been changed, in a blink of an eye,
And I can't forget, how I can't forget the dreadful thing did I
The door had closed, I had heard the sound, I shot five times
I still see things in flashes, our arguments, my anger, her angst, my fist flying....
The redness flashing over me, until I looked down to see what I'd done.
I must not think about that now
I can only see on my hands, stained by my guilt
of what I done
I fell, I fell hard, and now all that I have is gone
from six months ago I teetered at the pinnacle,
I have fallen into the abyss,
Fall
the blanket awaits me, the bars beckon me
my heart is still beating, shattered and broken on the floor
like the yesteryear of my life, the memory of what was before
I am alone and dark in a world turned against me
It was a dreadful mistake......wasn't it?
My fate and true judgement will await me,
unless I decide to create a noose with these white sheets
that hang so loose
Or maybe I will choose to face what I've done, before everyone --
Stand before everyone.
to await
my fate
my fate and true judgement await me, former icon, former star
former icon
no longer the bullet in chamber
but shattered on the humble floor.

 

Shattered, dashed, humbled, thrashed, fallen, lifted, not condemned, not forsaken.

No condemnation, not forsaken.

Stand to face judgement, but not forsaken by all.

To realize this, it takes a fall

Reviews

[Rick Puetter]

Dear Joanne,

This is brilliant in conception and execution. This was greatly enjoyed with high marks. I like it a lot.

Best regards,

Rick

[Joanna Johnson]

Thanks Rick,
Can you tell this whole Pistorius-thing affected me? I really admired him a lot as a runner, and as one passionate for South Africa. Also, I still remember the O.J fiasco -- the news over publicized that trial, to the point of obsession. Sadly, the summer O.J decided to speed down the freeway in his white bronco - garnishing all kinds of news coverage -- was the summer the Rwandan genocide, where hundreds of thousands were killed, drew to an end. But you hardly heard about that.

[Rick Puetter]

Hi Joanna, Yep. People (certainly the media) lose sight of what is really important in trying to concentration on the sensational.

And yes, the O.J. thing was such a circus. Everything rational was lost in that trial. I personally wrote to several newspapers concerning the fit of the "glove". Remember how hard it seemed for O.J. to put on the glove? It was pure sensationalism. What was lost in the suffle, however (do you remember), was his taking the of glove off? It slipped off with the littlest of effort, nearly falling off. That is totally inconsistent with it being a tight fit. If it goes on hard, it comes off hard. Apparently not the case here. Why did the prosecution miss this? This could have won the case for them, but they missed it. Nonetheless, none of the newspapers to which I wrote made any comment on my letters. Oh well. Such is life.

Rick

[Joanna Johnson]

Well, I for one, felt he did it. I know that the media tried to make the O.J trial a racial thing. They played on this. I remember seeing a picture where all the blacks were cheering when he was acquitted, while all the whites wore faces of anger and sorrow. Were my mom and I the only black Americans who felt that O.J was guilty? No, but that's what media had us believe.
Now, the glove thing -- I never even though about that. You're right, if it slips off easily, wouldn't that mean it fits. Plus, if it's a leather glove, it's going to fit tightly when you put it on anyway - that's what leather does.
Just a thought.