Holy f****n' hell! I want to see you read this. I want to see ever single word ripen inside your mouth and burst between your teeth as you spit out the center seeds. You're amazing. Combining rhythm, pieces of old commercials, old loves (you're never going to let Jimmi go, are you?") 21st century rappers, nursery rhymes, and f**k if you didn't even twist up If you Give A Cat A Cupcake (when your grandson gets old enough to read your poems I want o see his face when he reads thi, lol) and still make it fresh and own it! You're the poetic ripper of this century.
I loved this poem. This was probably one of the best poems I've come across on this site so far!
The imagery and diction is wonderful and I love the emotion of this piece. It is extremely well-written.
Keep up the good work!
I have to admit something to you...
I beatboxed my entire way through this abstract swirl of rhythm and rhyme. I spitlled a little on my computer screen, but that comes with the territory.
Oh the days in the life of femininity. We give men such a hard time for defining themselves rather quickly, but we spend our entirely life fighting against the tide of what we should be because we're too busy letting other women mold us.
I kept thinking to myself, "Which one of these descriptions best fit me?" But it was pointless to think that way. Just as you I have been the shaker and the baker, the woman and the man, the strong and the weak, the proud and the bleak - and what I have not become, only time is hindering me from morphing into.
Rhyme and rhythm has always been in your blood. So glad to see you split yourself open and spill more often.
This took many directions. It seems as though it has a solid function and that is to intrigue and delight with astounding stanzas that offer a flawless flow.
Oh you are so delightfully witty young lady... a great tongue in cheek piece about the labels society tries to put on the genders... you definitely are no stereotype.
Even though this was rhyme the whole poem flowed very naturally. I liked the haphazard quality, the abstractions, the way you let your mind wander on topic/off topic and that feeling in the poetry of the mind wondering.You touched on so many different ideas that the poem is open to literally hundreds of interpretations. It all worked brilliantly!