Nereids' Prayer~

Now I lay my seashell body

in a sand outline

by a child's rendition of a sand castle

slightly tilted

rainbow sprinkles in the moat

a wafer cone under the scuttle of a curious crab

 

I pray the lines

my soul to unfurl

not in yellow tape

but on the back of a seahorse

who happened by the coral reef of my spine

tugged my heart into the saddle of a wave

 

If I should sigh

before his cage

may the triton flay the membrane of my conscience

and the killer whale become

the alm

with which I am reborn from the sea

 

I pray the lord

not take the sea

it can eat the cities

and crush the hulls of a billion dolls

ambling

in stupefied thrall of flat screens

but leave the sea

o' lord

inside my veins

 

 

copyright2011vssmd/amusemusepress

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

 

 

Reviews

[OT]

ahh take me - but don't take the sea from within - the blood and spirit - the life/soul haha - whimsical trip (or splash ha) into the inner-psyche - twists and turns like the tides and that wanderlust seahorse - "reborn from the sea" - soothing for all the wrong reasons perhaps!! nice!

[George Korolog]

This is extremely well constructed with the Lord's Prayer as the springboard for your piece. You have a wonderful grasp of metaphor. I loved "rainbow sprinkles in the moat, a wafer cone under the scuttle of a curious crab." Just beautiful in the conjunction of child and ocean. I liked this piece very, very much.

[Lilly Negoi]

i honestly doubt even he could take you away from yourself...marvelous write :)

[David W Moore III]

i also pray the lord to leave the sea in your veins, the tides are enthralling

[My Fair Lady]

This is beautiful Selene. Again.. I'm left speechless.. and for a girl that usually has a lot to say.. that is something.

[Brad]

you....writing a prayer....who woulda thunk....

[Rikkevi Rue]

speaks in the language of the spirit...omnipotent and expansive as is the sea, reaching inside our souls and yet containing them, a connective link of thought-dream-life stretching back to primordial beginnings, an origin deep in our collective minds and yet waiting in our future unexplored. I admire the way your moonbeams reflect across its water and waves of consciousness gently lap up onto my shores...

[TAO]

First time I could safely say I wouldn't mind being swallowed by the sea... Wow. There's nothing more to say, Ms; you've killed it.

[Ed Hart]

how many times do i have to tell you you can only roll two dice; i know four of them give you lots and lots of big numbers, but it confuses the other players

[Amber Betty Marie Child..]

because you are a cyclone? (its a compliment)

[Amy Bumpas]

I love these lines: Now I lay my seashell body

in a sand outline

by a child's rendition of a sand castle

slightly tilted

rainbow sprinkles in the moat
Very creative my friend:)