Loveless Soulmate

I'm constantly fighting the circles my mind spins. It is the will of the present that toils it into visions of the future. It cannot possibly come in through the shores I have seen. I am the beaten, the broken, but so far from failing. The bruises confuse the appearance I portray. Am I that fragile? The breakable girl with the shield that shan't shatter. The guarded eyes darken my smile, but they guard of their own accord. Hurt will not flash before them and outer the inner turmoil. Love is a foreign master, or rather in love. The love I feel for others never manifests to that point where you allow yourself to be part of them. Do I have to trade the will and testament of my mind with that of the other? Do I turn myself inside out and stitch us together? Are we supposed to be one entity? Are they designed to love me too, or does unrequited really exist? Do I have to want to be with them endlessly? I strive for the recognition that I'm trying. That love is as intangible as stopping the swift tilt of my thoughts. I can think myself into a thousand dark, seemingly inescapable holes that I myself never rescue me from. I am the battered, rescued damsel that I never intended to be. Nothing I do can save me from myself. Nothing that anyone can do can save me from myself. And yet I call out in the very beating of my heart: save me...save me....save me.....save me. The beats will space so far that you can no longer hear them and my heart shatters; the unused victim of a loveless girl. Leave the pieces and fade away, I'll soon forget. It will be like you never existed. I'm sorry, my darling traveler, you are not the correct shape to fill the void, you're just passing through. There are souvenirs to your left.