HALF

 

                                I blew away

Half my brain

To make me feel

Half the pain

 

I guess tears will sting

And eyes will swell

Knowing half of me

Will burn in hell

 

I cut away

Half my heart

Letting half the love

Drift apart

 

Now half of me

Will fall in love

The other half

Will rest above

 

I burned away

Half my face

To hide the look

Of my disgrace

 

Now half of me

Will be deformed

The other half

Is left to mourn

 

Half the feeling

Half the hurt

Half is buried

Beneath the dirt

 

   Half a soul

A life to gain

Half of me

Without the pain

Reviews

[Everchanging Disaster]

Wow, this is a truly great write-very descriptive in regards to the lengths one will go in order to live without anguish. I love the dark and ominous tones you use. I wouldn't change a thing-If you go chopping your work of art and cutting out single words you meter will be destroyed. Most line carry 4 syllables and so I disagree with "Imperfectly Me".

I really enjoyed reading this poem that is so full of emotion it spills onto the reader...thanks for sharing!

[Ice Queen of the Vampir..]

Wow, this is a fantastic poem. It's sad, dark, and disturbing but awesome. I really like this one, great job!!!

Heather

[Kris Tate]

OMG this is awesome. I love the flow and language of this. It makes me wish I could take out half, I never thought of it that way. If you could take out half when you are in pain.... but what about when the pain is gone?

[SM Davis]

Sean this is a fantastic write! Working in this field, you hit the nail on the head. There are so many people that are in so much pain that they don't feel that they have any alternative. There is hope, but sometimes we need someone to hold hope for us until we can hold it for ourselves. Your insights come through in your writing, and you are a genious level poet. Of that I am certain.

If there were more people out there that realized that half is better than none. Your analogy here is stunning. HOPE is for everyone, and being one that provides services to those without hope, it's so amazing the difference a little hope can make. It doesn't have to be this way, but once you hit that level of desperation, it's very difficult to even listen to the message of hope when it comes your way.

I wish there were more people in this world that were as perceptive as you in your writing and the messages that you send.

[Nicole (Carpe Diem)]

sad piece - fantastic write

[Dead Angel]

eerie and disturbing!! very heart felt though, great rhyming and well written. wonderful job! :)

[Carrie Montgomery]

disturbing and moving all at once...smooth and flowing. Another great write.

[Damien Dsoul]

There's so much 'Half' going on with this poem. There's a yearning sadness, yes, but the sadness is more of a determined mind. Of someone who's so fed up with living life wholesome (probably from being hurt or down one too many times). The imagery is dark and disturbing ... but cool.

[Amanda]

a very sad story...the flow was good.

very well written.


Always,

Amanda @};--

[Brenda Sue]

Very deep and sad. This poem makes me think of Two-Face in Batman. Crazy I know but as I read it that is who it reminded me of. The flow and rhyme of the poem is very good. Wonderfully penned.

[Deborah Leah Krempa]

Pain very well expressed. Thank you for sharing. Debileah