History's Hairdresser - Dracula

Dracula goes for a haircut with his loquacious hairdresser.

Ah, Count, you’ve haven’t been here for an age. Will it be the usual? Exactly! Why tamper with a classic? The trick is to wait around cos everything comes back into fashion don’t it? One minute they’re saying flares are out, the next every bugger’s wearing them. You mark my words, stick it out for another decade or two and the widow’s peak will be all the rage.

How are you keeping anyway? Must get lonely up there in that castle all by yourself. What do you mean brides? Three of them? Well I never. Must be expensive to take care of three women. I struggle to keep our Marge and she’s only the size of three women. Ha!

Seen any good films recently? Yeah, that Twilight one was shite wasn’t it? My eldest thought it was great. Went out and got the book the next day. Never seen her read anything that wasn’t on a screen and there she is, can’t wrestle that book away from her. A book about you? Never heard of it. What’s it called? Oh. Who’s it by? Oh. Never heard of him. Wait, is the one that wrote The Shoulder of Shasta? He is! Oh, I loved that one. Well, if I get around to it, I’ll get the one about you.

Hey, Count, you’ve got a few grays at the back here. You want me to shoe polish them? No worries, mate, our little secret.

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