I hate myself for loving you

It was once

 

You were my present and future

You were my world and life

You were my dream and thought

You were my longing and meeting

 

It is now I realize

 

You ruined my past and cursed my present

You made me alone in this world and left me to future confusion

You turned the dreams I dreamt as nightmares and thoughts so painful

You departed from my life and I wish that our meeting never happened

 

My dear one I realize now

 

I was the cause of pain to my dear ones and strained myself to be with you

I lost my companions and hardly cared when all my relationships were discarded

I never knew joy and freedom and surrendered myself as a slave to your happiness

I lost my charm as many say that my smile is my asset

I cursed my body and soul and cared not to know any other love

 

But you my dear

 

You are practical and am a foolish

You lived the present and I dreamt the future

You made the things happen and to make them happen I derelict my other responsibilities

You enjoyed freedom through me and never knew that I was only your driver

You desired other body and longed for another soul and I thought you were misled

 

Yes my dear one

 

Now I hate myself for loving you.

 

 

Author's Note

excuse my style

Reviews

[BABSIE BEE]

Ohhhh the misery and pain felt here. I could almost feel it myself. The longing for someone, who once was loved to the max, but now no longer in our lives, is an unbearable burden to carry. This is so apparent in this piece of yours. My heart feels for the person who is deeply suffering. Friends are wonderful things to have, to share our worries with. They are hard to find...well true ones that is.We should never hate ourselves for anything. It was meant to be, and we are better people because of it. All these words of advice, and not one of them can ease the pain. If only my friend...if only !! Thanks for sharing.
Babsie Bee x

[Tate Morgan]

I think it a very retrospective look at ones life that goes no further than themselves Good work
Tate

[deleted]

Very intense! The anguish of lost love. Some of us love hard and in the end wind up hurt. Unrequited love. We can't regret the past we can only learn from it. You wrote in a way that the reader was able to feel the weight of your words...their meanings. Very well written and constructed...the flow was awesome. Excellent read!

[The Flawed]

This is great, full of emotion and passion, and it has pain dripping from my monitor, like melting ice-cream running down the cone and dripping through children's fingers on a hot summer day in the park.
Very brave to bare your soul for all to see,
But what do I know?
My favorite line:
I lost my charm as many say that my smile is my asset
Very well done