The crying child

A small text about me trying to to find my inner child

There is a lonely child deep within me, crying alone in darkness, muffled by silence, gasping for a breath of freedom, asking for help. The worst part is that this child doesn’t even know the reason of all this suffering, who’s responsible for it.

The child is me, a part of me that I’ve never nourished, a part that never expressed itself, a part that never blossomed,

Is it too late? Of course not

I have to find my inner child, make peace with him, tell him it’s alright, that it’s nobody’s fault, that he is perfect, we all have to…

My whole life I was told to behave correctly, to not elevate my voice, to not act like a fool, to not disrespect others, to always

follow the path that everyone takes.

I was also told that I’m not good enough, I will never be good enough, according to whom? I have no idea, following what standard? no clue either…

So the child version of me felt that he doesn’t belong anywhere, and when you don’t belong anywhere you create your own world, where only you can belong there, where you’re safe, where you’re the hero and everyone else is either the villain or in dire need of saving.

The years passed and I kept my inner child locked, thinking it was the right way to survive in this world, the right way of coping, the right way towards happiness.

I was obviously wrong, there is a limit to how long we can ignore the crying child, sooner or later we have to stand next to him and illuminate the dark place he’s been sitting in for this long.

“raise your head little one, this darkness is a mere illusion, just open your eyes to make it go away, you control it, this loneliness is your sanctuary, your safe haven that you can leave and comeback to anytime you want, you control it, this silence is a sweet melody that can be enjoyed or broken, start shouting, start laughing, start crying, you control it, you are free, your freedom is within your mind, within your body, arise my child, your days of past sorrow are over”

 

Author's Note

The first time sharing something like this with the world :)