Chapter 1

It was cold, bitter cold, the kind you know you’re at the stage of frostbite where your nerves finally stop working, but it feels so good to be warm you don't care if your fingers fall off. I tried gathering my thoughts but there seemed to be none to find. A shuddering breath shook me fully awake. Eyes opening I could tell I was on my side, but nothing else could be gathered for the immense darkness that enveloped me. Should I be scared? I think I'm afraid of the dark…but I feel nothing. Except this nagging spot in in my stomach, wait... it was moving up inside my throat, meld! Burning bile erupted out of my mouth, it tasted like blood. For the first time I moved, trying to get away from my acidic bile. Head swimming I slowly rolled onto my side clanking the shackles on my wrists and ankles."She be finally awake Ulu!" a deep, stunted, raspy voice spoke through the darkness, followed by scuffling  of armor boots on rough stone floor. Another voice spoke, it was higher than the one before, "Step aside," more armor clashing and the sound of cogs, wheels, and locks turning sounded to my left. Blinding light shot through an opening making tears well up from the pain in my light deprived eyes. "Disgusting, clean that up." sounded the high soprano from outside, I could here his voice clearly now. It was high an reserved with maybe a bit of Ivishbanese. His face a blur from my tears, I heard him kneel down beside me check my pulse, than move on to feeling my arms and leg muscles. Prodding my joints, searching my body for scars or deformities I didn't know. He spoke again, "She strong and fit, but weak." I felt hands grab my chin and sweep the knotted hair from my face, "Can you hear me women?" I nodded blinking my sore eyes. "Good,” he dropped my chin and stood up. "Now, get her above ground." he said, heals clacking as he strode out. Calloused hands scooped me up swinging me onto their broad shoulders. My head lolled from dizziness as he carried me out of the frozen cell. My consciousness falling into darkness once again.

“Settle down girl, Shhhh! Or they will hear you!” I felt a wet cloth touch my face, trying to cool the searing heat coming from my body. Everything hurt. Everything was spinning. It felt like I had been ripped apart then put together again. I opened my eyes slowly the room danced patterns. “There girl, lets get you to the backroom before the guards return.” I felt people help me to my feet, trudge slowly to a small wooden chair in a dark windowless room. It was hot an the air smelled of rotting meat. The senses were too much, I vomited again. “Oh gross Mama Mehar! Why do we have to care for her? Can’t the kitchen take her or Mama Kitar?”

“Oh hush, Katrin. Would you not want the same kindness? Now go fetch me water.”

“Yes Mama.”

I tilted my head towards the one I guessed was Mama Mehar she was a stout woman with a face you could tell was once beautiful, but was now wrinkled over with age. She smiled a toothy grin at me. “Where am I?” I asked, better yet I wanted to ask who I was but that seemed crazy. “Child you are at the Prison Barrens. You have done a deed worthy of your time here I suspect.” She answered.

“I…don’t remember…”

“Tsk, still downed from the drugs they give you so you don't know exactly the way here, what’s your name?”

“...I don’t know.”

“What? You’ll remember in time. Now lets get you dressed, I must get back to my duties. From now on you will follow me until you get the hang of how things run. We serve the guards in the mess hall, and clean.” She pushed off the floor and held her hand out to me, I took it. She was stronger than she looked. I was starting to walk when the other girl, Katrin I think her name was, walked in, or more like waddled since she was carrying a huge bucket filled with water. “Oh dear Katrin. Haha.” Mama Mehar laughed and helped me walk out, “HEY! Aren’t you going to help!” Called out Katrin, she was a bone skinny blond with crooked teeth and huge eyes. “Haa no.” Mama called back, and was answered with a yell and the splashing of water. “She’s always complaining about something. Come come we really need you in something other than those rags.” I stumbled after her still immensely dizzy. Every step was agony. I puked again going down some twisting stairs, after that Mama Mehar let me lean on her the rest of the way. We entered a sparse room. A dirty rug, two dirty mattresses, and a broken wardrobe were the only furnishings in the small dusty room, besides a wobbly chair that she sat me in. “So by the looks of you, you are of the fairer races, where are you from? Arthyme? Siinika? Kor'Crescva?” by the look on my face she stopped talking. I had no idea, my head felt like exploding. She opened the creaking wardrobe door pulled out a shabby cloth skirt and lace up leather vest, along with worn strap up leather sandals. “I'll be coming back for you soon. Change and rest.” with that she hobbled out and closed the creaking wooden door. I sat and tried to think through the throbbing. I knew of the places she had spoken. I could tell you where they were on the map, the languages they spoke what kind of government they had, their rulers. What I couldn't tell you was if I had ever been there, known anyone that lived there, or if one of those countries is where I had come from. The language I had been speaking with Mama Mehar was Seruban. I knew that at least along with other useless geographical facts that popped in and out of my head like flies. If by language this place would most likely be on the eastern most part of the great continent of Caasan. All Desert, some dry plain lands. That explains all the sand. I itched my scalp, definitely could use a bath. After no luck of remembering anything else useful, I slowly started stripping of the crusty bloody rags covering my body. The only thing running through my mind as I cumbersomely dressed seeing healing cuts throughout my body was, what the hell happened and who the bloody hell am I?

Mama Mehar came to find me dead asleep on one of the gritty mattresses. I sat up as she plopped her self on the chair wiggling back and forth on the uneven legs. “So my little thief, you ready to tell me your name?” I shook my head, sighed and stood up, “I don't know it. You can call me whatever you like.” she looked at me chewing her mouth from side to side, “Ulu Daa'chitan wants to see you. He's the head here.” she chewed her mouth again before speaking, “ He's going to ask you questions and saying 'I don't know' is not going to satisfy him. I suggest you pull something out of that pretty little head, or make something up.”

Guards came and escorted myself up a flight of stairs, Mama Mehar followed until we reached to wooden double doors. She winked as the doors opened and hobbled off. The guards pushed me forward, they had tied my hands behind my back making me stumble awkwardly through the door. As I rose up from my knees, the Ulu was looking down at me from his impossibly long nose. He was tall and reminded me of a brown string bean. Comparatively he has straw like blonde almost white hair, coffee bean skin and piercing ice blue eyes with arching, judging eyebrows. His wormy lips twisted into a snide smile as he waved the guards out. The door closed, he looked me up and down, walked around me twirling his little white beard between slender fingers and grotesquely long nails. “We don't get many girls of your color around here my dear bruuda.” bruuda essentially meant a more derogatory term for woman, like broad. He then snapped my face up grabbing my chin, tilting my head from side to side, opening my mouth and feeling my teeth, and finally looking strait into my eyes like he was inspecting an animal. “Your eye's are defiant, we'll break you of that.” Thats when he slapped me, backhand splitting my bottom lip. The pain was nothing compared to the anger that flashed, my hands curled into fists, red rimmed around my vision. My lips curled back in fury, that earned me a gut punch, he held me in place as I caught my breath stroking my hair, “Now, now, no need to be like that we can be friends, good friends.” He kept holding me in place as I struggled, but his sniveling voice was still talking in my ear. “So where are you originally from my little dear? You were arrested in Benram lak, but they didn't find anyone that knew you or even saw your lovely face. Now as it happens I really could care less who you are but how you found yourself in the sealed temple of Suez, and what were you trying to get your grubby little hands on.” I finally was able to push away, I wiped by mouth and spat. He didn't need to know, that I didn't know any of the s**t he was talking about. But it was something for me If he wasn't lying, Benram lak was a city in Seruba the country below here and Tazran. The Ulu chuckled and brushed the hair out of my face, I flinched he laughed again and asked again where I was from. I was going to take Mama Mehars advice but now I was going to see if I could get anything else out of those wormy lips.

I Didn't. Mama Mehar held a piece of not so cold slab of meat to my swollen eye, “I told you to make something up.” I pushed her away, “I can handle myself woman.” and thats when she smacked me square on forehead. “Take care of yourself my wrinkly arse. You can't even remember your own name. Now if you want my help be a good girl and help me with the rounds. And no sassy s**t.” I followed her waddling gait rubbing the smarting bump, scowling. I was getting hit alot today. It was hard to keep up from my limping, that mother-melder was no man to beat women for fun. He will pay, but first I needed information and a way to get out of this baking dirt prison.

“Have you ever cleaned a day in your life?” Mama Mehar asked swatting my head with a wooden spoon. I rubbed my head and said, “Have you?” that earned me another smack, “I’ve done my life’s work, I’m a poor old woman stuck in a prison. Don’t I get some rest?” she was a sly little old bat. All the older guards adored her, giving her tobacco for her pipe or tidbits of world gossip. All the girls looked up to her, or respected her age and wisdom. I think she used to be important, more than she lets on anyway. Mama Mehar stays with me now most of the time even though I have my own duties and routes assigned, she says I'm interesting, not as dull witted as the other  imprisoned women. Then goes on telling me rumors and stories about the gods, and sometimes about her life, which I can't tell are real or not. I have no idea why she trusts me so much. She says it’s because I’ll just forget what she tells me anyway. Then she hits me with her cane. “I don’t think prostitution is considered hard work Mama.” I answered scrubbing extra hard on a grease stain. “My Hera Vana it’s very hard work! Hah, let’s see you please a high lord.” Mama Mehar had the pet name Hera Vana for me since I couldn't remember my own, it meant lost child in Tazrani.

“Isn’t that what got you here in the first place?”

“Cha, Vana I forget how much I tell you. Get up now we have rounds to make, well you do.” The jobs I had to do were serving the prison mates their food from cell to cell. Then serving the guards copious amounts of sand filled mashed potatoes, or whatever else they managed to get off a random traveler in the middle of the desert. And lastly cleaning. But more like scooting the abundant amount of sand and dirt from one corner to the other. I wiped my gritty sandy hands over the rough cloth of my apron, standing up an grabbing the grimy bucket of water. I followed Mama Mehar down the hallway towards the guards mess hall. As we entered the kitchen I poured the rest of the water from the bucket into a pot over a fire to boil out the dirt. There where other women that were held here, Along with other Mamas to supervise or settle petty matters. Some cooked or cleaned like me. Others washed clothes, stealing away to the guards quarters. Honestly I knew they all hated me. Even the other Mama's had a contemptuous gleam in their eyes. Cool stares followed me whenever I passed, the whispers that followed me when I turned around corners. Mama says they’ll grow to accept me, it's just because I'm from the north. But I know that’s not true. A part of me feels like I’m better than they are, or ever will be. I turned when I heard I snide comment from the direction of a group of women scrubbing out dirty rags. “I don't know why Mama favors her she looks so awkward, just look at her sunburnt skin.”

“What a melding harlot look at the way she dresses herself so all the guards look at her with lust.”

“I heard there going to put her in the fights because she's so manly.”

I looked down at myself, there where dirty mirrors cracked and murky to see oneself in. I was average height at least with long mousy brown hair. I wasn't built wimpy by any means, I thought my figure was nice. Mama said most of the guards did too. “Ahh, don't pay attention they know your the prettiest one here makes them feel threatened.”

“Maybe I should just where cloth from head to toe like a priestess.”

“You cant help you have nice perky tits an' a*s.”

We both laughed and dumped a massive pile of dirty clothes and rags at their feet, which earned me more scathing looks. “You know you have pit duty tonight.” One of the glaring washers spat at me. She was tall, dark with a massive cornucopia of frizzy black hair, and especially nasty.

“Of course she knows you twit, she's been having it every night because they can't stand your homely faces and rotting claxa's serving them anymore.”

“Shut it you old wrinkly w***e.”  sounded a dark red skinned, flame haired border lander named Jesican, a comment like that earned me slamming her head into the wash table. As of late it was getting harder to control my rage, mama didn't help much either. She just laughed heartedly, jabbing Jesicans stomach with her cane, her face came up gasping for air, nose kinked and face bloody. Frizzy black hair jumped on my back scratching the side of my face, I threw her forward slamming her body into the ground with mine. She grunted clawing once again towards my face, I pinned her hands easily with one of mine and slammed her head against the metal bin. She instantly was limp. Another pair of hands grasped around my throat choking, another twisting through my hair pulling my head back. It was Katrins crooked smile looking at me along with Melta's scarred black eye'd stare. A cane sent Melta flying still clinging to my long hair, which brought me landing backwards on top of Katrin, I purposefully used to fall so knock my head against hers. The grasp around my neck was gone, jabbing with my elbow I found a soft spot on her side. Katrin squirmed beneath me. I flipped my self around and grabbed Katrins face holding her down, I pinned her arms with my legs. I sprung up when I could hear a guard trampling down the stairs. Looking over at Mama she smiled a toothy grin and winked as the guard finally reached the landing, “Black beast, whats been going on here?” the kitchen staff went on cooking, saying nothing as the girls started picking themselves up. The guard looked from me to Mama Mehar, I guess we looked conspicuous. “There was just a little accident right girls, just some slippery soap?” They all nodded going back to there seats. “Well keep it down. I don't have time for klutzy bruudas, the matches are about to start.”

“Didn't know you had that much in you.” I smiled at the comment as we walked back to the bathing rooms, “Who where you child? It boggles me, your features are regal of that I can tell but you act like an urchin. Either you honestly don't know or your hiding the truth.” I shrugged, “I'd tell you if I knew.” After a little silence she spoke seriously, “I've decided to take you on as my apprentice.”

“Haha of what Mama? Whoring?” She smacked the back of my legs, cackling.

“No, no, no. Before things went downhill in Tazran and I lost all my inheritance, I was the knowledge keeper at the temple Novamessa, not a small feat. I'm not getting any younger, and I need someone to carry on the legacy.” we reached the steamy first bathing room and pealed of dirty sandy clothes into a pile. “I don't understand, Mama don't you have to be a priestess and, uhhhh... holy?”

“Well technically yes. But you could say I shot that in the arse a long time ago. It doesn't mean I can't teach you the skills. Getting older I'd like to think my knowledge could still mean something.”

“...I don't know, I'm in here so I could hardly say I'm priestess material even if I don't remember who I was.” The bathing rooms where the only place that had slabs of rock for the floor. The first room you went in had a stair case that led down underground where the actual washing took place. It was all carved from rock including the stairs. It was always really steamy from the hot air hitting intensely cool water. They had lighting in the form of dim fey orbs hooked into the walls that ranged in colors from, white, orange, blue and purple. Water trickled through the stairs halfway down, it came from the underwater rivers that also supplied their drinking water. It was was very cold underground, it was nice retreat from the sweltering heat everywhere else. “What exactly would it entail for me to learn?” I asked as we reached the cavernous carved out room, water dripped down from the ceiling and ran down the walls. We seated ourselves on benches carved in the rock, washing off most of the grime before going into the running pool in a deeper part of the cavern. She answered, “You would learn of the all the gods their histories, how to worship each one for they like different things. The history of the this world, of the ancients who sacrificed greatly for us. There is also some magics.” I nodded, and she went on, “If they accept you, which is unlikely, you would get blessings from gods that especially favor you.”

“Were you ever?”

“Blessed? Yes I was.” She held out the palm of her hand were I could see it. There was an outline of what looked to be a tattoo of a many petaled flower, then I started noticing traces that ran up to her forearm making designs that I took for just age she was so wrinkled. “These marks appear and glow showing what blessing you received and when you use them.” I look her hand and examined it turning it over, the designs flowed one onto another. Lines and scenes now crisscrossed her body.

“I've never noticed them before? How could I not see them?”

“They lose there definition when not used, mine are also old and much faded from there old glory they once were, and also unusable. They became more apparent when I thought about them.” She took her hand back and stood, “We must hurry now they'll be expecting you in the arena soon.” I followed her hobbling to the pool in the back.Grabbing a chunk of lard soap I immersed myself in the deep pool languishing in the coldness, thinking as I swam. Why not please the old woman? She's taken me under her wing, I can do what she wants.

Mama Mehar had disappeared when I emerged from my bath, I looked for her in drying room, it was empty except for a few women getting ready. “huh, I hope she didn't drown.” I mumbled and started pulling a comb through my hair, smudged some red paste on my lips and then dressed myself in nicer clothes for the mess hall. They were still dotted with little stains but no one ever noticed or cared. The mess hall looked out over a huge dirt area from all sides.The arena not only made money for the prison guards who gambled on the fighting against one another (most of the time to the death), it also I think helped kept the prison capacity below overflowing. Sometimes they would bring in animals or the occasional wondering warrior looking for glory, wanting to test his strength in the arena. The arena was guarded by these immensely ugly beasts called Egoru. They were two times the size of man and three times as fat, and very, very stupid. The Egoru's natural language consisted mostly of grunts, and lots of drool. Axes and hammers were their weapons of choice, or I would say any blunt object. “Hey'o sweet cheeks more ale!” A large guard yelled clunking his empty glass rudely against my thigh. I scooted out of his range going up to the bar for more drinks. “How's little miss Vana this fine evening?” the bartender a rugged middle aged woman with salt and pepper hair asked as I set four empty glasses before her, “They seem extra swarthy tonight eh?” I nodded leaning on the counter top resting my face in one hand waiting for her to finish filling the drinks. “You seen the new girl yet? Damn fine if you ask me, pulled her outta solitary confinement.”

I straitened, “No I haven't, I didn't know they kept any women in cells.”

“ 'Ell if I know sugar, I just saw them bring her down to the woman's quarters.” She pushed the foaming filled drinks towards me, I grabbed the frosted glasses and headed back out into the mess of men.

“She looks like a scraggly scarecrow.” The snide voice of one of the women sounded as I came down from the mess hall arena. I'd have to say her statement of the new girl was the exact opposite, She was absolutely beautiful. A little dirty maybe but gorgeous none the less. We made eye contact, her eyes were fierce and familiar, my stomach knotted my knees weakened. I know her. I stepped forward almost involuntarily, Mama Mehar decided then to make an appearance, “Vana looks like we have another case of forgetfulness.” She gestured towards the girl and the spell was broken, she then was being escorted down to the baths by a guard. “She reminds me of you, but acts like a wounded animal ready to spring. Already kicked the s**t out of Katrin. But whats new.” Mama slapped my but with her cane, “Time to make the last rounds.” I quickly changed back into work clothes but I couldn't stop thinking about the new girl. I needed to talk to her, she has to know me, know something about my past. I caught the last part of Mama Mehars sentence as we grabbed the soup pot, “...Some kind of curse or something.”

“Who has a curse?”

“You, and the new girl she doesn't remember anything either, it can't just be a coincidence.”

“But why was she being held in a cell?”

“I tried talking to her, she just stared at me so Katrin asked if she was stupid or something. Thats when she beat her.”

“Your right about it not being coincidence, I know her... I know her face. I need to talk to her.”

“Well well well!” Mama cackled, “Little miss secret is telling me something!”

As we went on the rounds I kept spilling soup everywhere being so deep in thought. That got scowls and very sexiest remarks from the inmates. How could I focus after seeing the only thing remember? It was all I could do not to run back to the woman's quarters.

Reviews

[TLK]

The first sentence is a little confusing. It becomes clear that the first person narrator is not awake yet, but the first sentence makes it sound that the narrator is awake. "I tried gathering my thoughts but there seemed to be none to find" would be a great first sentence. It is interesting on its own, but also makes the reader (or at least me) want to know more about the first-person speaking character.

It is hard to read this easily as the font size is small and the paragraphs are not separated. It's very useful if, on a screen, the paragraphs have space between them. It is a very rare reader who will read fiction of this length on a screen -- that's why so much of this site is small poems.