Soups On

 everyone, everyone, run quick!

there is soup in the pot and I gave it a lick.

it scallded my tongue, boy it was hot

but damn it, there was soup in the pot.

 

 everyone, everyone, come quick!

a tree fell over so we can play with a stick.

it broke my big toe, boy it was huge

now my treehouse is gone, where I use to take refuge!

 

  no one came running.

so I finished the soup, yummie, it was delishes!

no one came quick.

so I cut the tree down, and forgot about it.

 

  everyone, everyone, come see what i've got.

a ten guage shot gun, with double buck shot!

i chamberd a round with only one pump.

Gave the trigger a squeese, now whos the chump?

 

  everyone, everyone come see what i've done!

scouwerd the house clean at the end of a gun.

room by room, creeping slowly i went.

before i killed you i made you repent!

 

  everyone, everyone, come see who i am!

i escaped from the prison, the big house, the slamb.

soup was hot, and damn tastey too.

stick was fun to play with but i've got to go, i'm through!

 

 

 

Author's Note

Please feel free to critique this piece. Ignore any grammar issues but please do point out spelling mistakes!

Reviews

[Ripple of Aqua]

I find this a bit weird, if you don't mind, at first I thought it was to be a tale of a child that was deprived of soup, along with his family and such, but it turned out that he apparently had enough money to not even worry about sharing. I think the main point is that he came from the bottom and shot to the top? A little confusing though easy to read.

[Kenneth The Poet]

This reminds of that one song by Warren Zevon, "Excitable Boy".

He's an excitable boy they all said. He's just an excitable boy.

[knowman]

I also found it interesting and quit different

[Yina]

Yikes. That was... interesting:) I haven't read anything like it before:)