Needing Safety

My experience with PTSD

Needing Safety

I've laid my head down

But sleep doesn't come

The day is over

Thinking this was done

Thoughts won't stop racing

Still hearing the scream

But not quite so bad

As it is when I dream

“Breathe in then breathe out

Counting 6 and 8

Then do it some more

Lower the heart rate”

In seeking safety

The things that I do

Some of them healthy

There's others I rue

“I see green, red, blue

I feel soft, hard, coarse

I hear fan, car, dog

No help in knowing the source”

These thoughts out of time

Keep dragging me back

It's all hate and shame

Praying for peace that I lack

“Feelings aren't facts

My thoughts are not real

Be still and know God

There's still time to heal”

Reviews

[captain]

Sad, sometimes when people go through something truly hard, it haunts your life-time dreams. A friend advice me that always write, write and write those experience away. And when you posted it online someone, and i mean there will always be someone who suffers the same, perhaps just a different situation. I think your doing good now, heading on and you stood up to the demons of the past. Keep writing sir.

[abluehorseandflowers]

Thank you for your encouragement.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Best to deal with it...head on...
and by writing them down...
helps a great deal to let go...
and start the healing process...
write often...and keep on writing...
your thoughts down...and purge...

[abluehorseandflowers]

Thank you Glen. There's nothing like writing through issues.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

you're welcome...I write for therapy...keeps my mind going...and not resting on one subject too long...keeps you active and engaged in something new...

[abluehorseandflowers]

I write until I'm written-out, experimenting with looking at the subject from different perspectives. Check out "Looking in Words" and "Despair" to get a sense of what I mean.

[Glen Yumang Manese]

Will do!!! I just read a couple more...nursing a feral kitten...mom (queen) died and left them by the door...one kitten was a casualty last night...but I see life in the last one...eating and moving about is a good sign...this is going to be a battle...do my best to keep alive...

[Frontier]

Hello,

Interesting theme, I think PTSD affects almost everyone in different ways. I like how you had some parts with quotes, like a "helping voice" and then you added your own feelings/version. I'd like it if you would review my first poem on here, thanks!

[abluehorseandflowers]

Thank you Frontier. The quoted verses are in fact a "helping voice." They're grounding techniques to move through anxiety attacks. I'd be delighted to read your poem.