Part IV: Teenage Dream Year -5

Part IV: Teenage Dream

Year -5

November 14, 2003

Dear Diary:
Alright, so it’s been a couple of months since school started, and it seems like everybody forgot about the whole ‘me being a s**t’ thing. Thank God, that was torture, I was crying for months. Thank God for summer vacation. I’m still going to avoid dating for awhile, I’m suspicious of everyone, what Samson did was just disgusting, he made me feel worthless. Not anymore, I will never let anybody take advantage of me ever again. Kurt moved away, which is a bummer cause that just leaves me, Michael and Lois left. Oh well, that’s life. The popular girls still make my life hell from time to time. Not as much as they used to though, probably because I stopped wearing sweatpants to school, still wearing my t-shirts though, d****t. I love my t-shirts. We also got a new cute boy in our class this year named Jack Walker and he actually talks to me. I know I said I’m not ready to date again, and I’m not but when I am, I’m hoping that he’ll be good to me. This week is my sixteenth birthday, and I’m so super excited! I’m going to the doctor on Wednesday for a checkup and see if I can get my permit. I really hope so, cause that’s one thing I’ve always wanted to do was drive and now that I’ll be old enough to, I really hope I can, I’m actually looking forward to it. Well, got school tomorrow, night.

“So, Jack. How do you like our school so far?” Sandra asks.
“It’s pretty good I guess. You guys all seem great.” Jack, a blonde haired kid with glasses says.
“Yeah…”
“So what is there to do in this town?”
“Well, we have an arcade, bowling alley, couple of parks.”
“Neat.” The bell rings.
“S**t, school is over. See you later, Jack.”
“Later, Sandy.” Sandra packs up her backpack and gets on the bus. Michael sits next to her.
“How’s it going Sandy?” he asks.
“Pretty good.”
“You like Jack?”
“Kind of.”
“Yeah, I can tell.”
“Is it really that obvious?”
“Yeah.”
“Well, it’s just a crush, I’m not looking to date right now anyway.”
“Ok, good.”
“Why, are you jealous?”
“N-no, I’m just protective.”
“Haha, ok, sure.”
“Look, he seems like bad news.”
“You say that about everybody, get over yourself. You’re just mad I don’t have a crush on you.”
“That’s not true!” He turns red.
“I’m not stupid, I know you might have some kind of little crush on me, and I’m flattered, but I only see you like a brother… for now at least, I don’t know, I mean, we could try in like ten years, but definitely not now.”
“Oh… I’m gonna hold you to that.” He laughs.
“Haha, ok.” The bus stops. “See you later, Michael.”

November 15, 2003

Dear Diary:
Jack is really, really cute. He has blonde hair, blue eyes that reflect when the light hits his glasses. I might consider changing my mind, I mean, he’s not from around here so he doesn’t know me like the other guys at school do. I’ll ask him sometime this week, or next week, or next month, or something. I don’t know, I’m too nervous to ask anyone out, I’m terrified of rejection. I don’t know. Michael has a crush on me, I’m not sure how I feel about that. I mean, he’s my best friend and all, and I don’t wanna hurt his feelings but I don’t want him. It sounds terrible I know, but I’m just not attracted to my best friend and he obviously is. Hopefully he got the hint when I explained it. Well anyway, later.

The next day, Sandra’s sitting in lunch with Michael and Lois. “Hey, how come Jack isn’t sitting with us?” she asks.
“He’s with Marissa.” Michael says. Sandra looks over and sees them holding hands.
“What the f**k?”
“Yeah, they’ve been going out all day.”
“Eew, why her? I’m much better looking.”
“Why do you care? I thought you weren’t ready for a relationship yet.”
“I- I’m not, I just- aargh!” She grunts in frustration.
“You were gonna ask him out, weren’t you?”
“I was thinking about it.”
“Well, looks like he found someone already, too slow.”
“D****t.”

November 16, 2003

Dear Diary:
Well, this sucks. Apparently, Jack already found a girlfriend, Marissa. Like, ew, she is so fat and gross, why does he like her? Ugh, I’ll never understand boys. That’s why I’m waiting to date again. I’m so upset over this. Why doesn’t he like me? Why was I too slow? Now I ruined my chance cause I took too long. D****t, d****t, d****t. Now I have to wait until he’s free again. What’s wrong with me? I don’t know what I want… this sucks. Well regardless, looks like I’m going to be alone for a while again.
Oh well, I’m used to it by now. I really hate being alone, though. I love romance, I love loving, and I love being loved and my relationships so far have been really short. I wanna experience a long relationship, know what it’s like to actually get to know somebody. I hate being so alone all the time, it depresses me. Like, I even hate seeing other people in relationships, cause it just reminds me that I don’t have anyone. I know it may seem silly to most people, but it’s always been a dream of mine to get married and have a family. I know, people do either or both all the time, but for me, it’s personal, something I really want to happen to me in my life. Oh well, I still have my whole life ahead of me to make that dream come true. Ugh, doctor’s appointment tomorrow, but at least I find out if I can drive or not.

November 17, 2003

Dear Diary:
Well, this sucks. So, it has to be five years since my last seizure. I haven’t been that lucky, so that means no driving for me. It’s such bullshit, I really wanna drive. I mean, it’s something basically everybody does, and I can’t. Probably not ever, because even if I only have one in that time span, I have to start all over again, so it seems completely pointless to try. Oh well, at least there’s always public transportation, I guess. It could be worse, I could live in a rural area and not have any public transportation at all. It still sucks though, cause that’s something I’ve always wanted to do too. Well, at least I still have my sweet sixteen this Saturday night, although my parents still haven’t told me where or when it is which concerns me. They keep avoiding me every time I ask, like what are they hiding? I know it’s happening, it’s not a surprise, so why are they being so secretive about it? Oh well, I’ll find out sooner or later. Boy, this has been a disappointing week so far…

The next day, Sandra is sitting in lunch with Michael and Lois when Samson approaches them. “What do you want?” Sandra asks.
Look, I kinda feel bad about what I did to you last year, and I want to make it up to you in a big way.”
“And what’s that?” He hands her an invitation.
“You’re invited to my birthday party this Saturday night.”
“Are you f*****g serious??? Is this a cruel joke? This is the same time as my party, you a*****e!”
“Look, my parties are high profile. I only give out ten of these a year and four go to my friends immediately. Kids in this school would do unspeakable things to get into one of my parties. I had a kid last year eat his own s**t for one. I introduced him as s**t boy the whole party. I’m giving you a free invitation with no strings attached. I promise, it will be worth your while if you come, in fact, I can guarantee you’ll go.”
“We’ll see about that.”
“You can bring one friend. One.”
“I’m not going, I have my own to go to.”
“Whatever.” He walks away.
“Can you believe that a*****e? The same time as mine, like my sweet sixteen doesn’t even matter, what the f**k?”
“I told you he’s a dickbag.” Michael says.
“This has been the bullshittiest week I’ve ever had.”
“Yeah, it does sound like you’ve been having a bad week.”
“Can I have it?” Lois asks.
“Have what?” Sandra asks.
“The invitation.”
“Seriously? Aren’t you coming to mine?”
“I can make both.”
“What the f**k? I thought you were my best friend?”
“I am, but I would suck his and his friends’ c***s for an invitation but I really don’t wanna take it that far.”
“Fine, take it.” She throws the invitation at her.
“Awesome.”
“Ugh, my life sucks.”

November 18, 2003

Dear Diary:
Wow, this week is just getting shittier and shittier. My already small party is now smaller because Lois is going to Samson’s party because I refuse to go so she took my invitation. Who the f**k does he think he is inviting me to his party when he knows damn well that’s when my party is? It makes me so damn mad, I just wanna scream. Well, at least tomorrow is my birthday, right? Not like it can get any worse from here…

November 19, 2003

Dear Diary:
So, my parents decided to do cake and their presents for my birthday today, which was nice. Michael and Lois were over for it, so that was pretty nice. They told me the party was still on for tomorrow, but still no details except that it won’t be at the house. I hope they didn’t rent out Chunk E. Cheddar’s, I’m too old for that, although I still have fun there. Eeew, what if it’s a Burger Monarch or McJizzles? I’m too old for that, too. No way I’m wearing a paper crown or sitting on a clown’s lap on my sixteenth birthday. Not knowing is killing me, I really, really wanna know where I’m going! Whatever, it may have been a s****y week, but today wasn’t bad. My parents try their best to give me the best life they could and I’m grateful for that. Well, time for bed, big day tomorrow.

Around evening, Sandra is getting ready for her party. She wears a beautiful, shimmering red dress that waves as it moves. She lets her hair down and puts in contacts. She applies just enough makeup to look presentable and not overdone. “Aye que linda, Sandra, you look so bonita.” Sonia says, crying after she walks into Sandra’s room and sees her.
“Mami, don’t cry, I’m gonna start.”
“I’m sorry, Sandy, you’re so big now, I remember holding you as a baby like it was just yesterday my little salchicha, and now you’re a beautiful young woman.”
“It’s ok, mom. I’ll always be your baby, besides you’ve got three more.”
“I know, but you’re my first, chica.”
“Alright, mom.”
“Are you ready?”
“Yeah, I’m ready. Where are we going?”
“Just somewhere.”
“Come on, mom, tell me!”
“You’ll find out when we get there.”
“I wanna know now!” she stomps her foot.
“No temper, Sandy. It’ll all make sense soon. It’s your sweet sixteen, of course it’s a secret.”
“Alright, mom.” Maxx comes up the stairs.
“You guys ready to- my, Sandra, you look beautiful honey.” He says.
“Thanks, daddy.”
“Guys ready to go?”
“Yeah.” They all go in the car and start driving. They drive for a good twenty minutes before they go to the outskirts of the city. “Dad? Dad, where are we going?”
“We’re almost there, honey. Calm down.” They keep driving for another ten minutes, before they stop at a house. They park and go through the gate and go to the door where a bunch of people are crowded around.
“What is this place?” She walks through the front door and ends up in a big room with a bunch of people in it yelling ‘surprise!’. “What? What’s going on?”
“Sandy! You made it!” Samson says.
“What? What are you talking about?”
“Happy birthday. Like I said, I wanted to make it up to you.” He yells to the crowd, “Oh, by the way, kids’ room is the third door on your left, bathrooms are labeled, fifth and fourth doors on the right, and an open bar, so drink as much as you want, keep an eye out for my parents, thank them for our awesome party!”
“Our?”
“Yes, our. We share the same birthday, remember?”
“Yeah… I know, we hold our birthdays at the same exact time every single year and you always beat me in attendance.”
“Yeah, I always crush it.”
“Is this a joke?”
“Not at all. See, I really do feel bad about what I did. See, it happened like this: I was bragging to my friends about how I fucked you to gain access to legendary parties, which as I’ve come to find out, don’t compare to mine anyway. Anyhoo, my dad overheard me and told me that a real man doesn’t use women for personal gain for a number of reasons. Most importantly that they get half your money and things, are spiteful, and vengeful. That, and women aren’t assets, they’re people, not like underlings who have to do what I say. So as I was saying, it got me to thinking about what I did to you and you didn’t deserve that at all, I made you believe one thing when my motive was completely different.
So, I thought about how to make it up to you, so I asked my parents, they talked to your parents, and they set this up for us. And the best part is, everybody brought gifts for both of us. My parents got intel from your parents to make sure people bought you the right presents, and there’s even a present from me among them.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, so enjoy your sweet sixteen.”
“I don’t- I don’t know what- oh my God, I’m so stupid, I thought you were just being an a*****e like usual.”
“Yeah, I can see how that could’ve been misconstrued, but I wasn’t planning on ruining the surprise, I didn’t go through all that effort to blow it.”
“You knew the whole time?”
“Of course, I thought of the whole thing.”
“Thank you.”
“No problem, now enjoy your sweet sixteen. Looks like your invite and her plus one are here.”
“What?”
“I knew you’d get rid of it, I just didn’t know who you’d give it to, I figured it’d be one of your friends though.” Lois walks up to Sandra.
“What are you doing here? I thought you weren’t coming?” Lois asks.
“I-I wasn’t, but apparently it’s my party too.”
“For real?”
“Yeah, yeah, I’m as surprised as you are. Samson arranged the whole thing.”
“Nuh uh.”
“Yeah huh. Maybe he really isn’t that big a piece of s**t as I thought.”
“Huh. Who knew?”
“So, where’s your date? Samson said you had a plus one.”
“Oh, I brought Jack.”
“Jack? Really? I thought you would’ve brought Michael.”
“What? No, no, I’m uh, I’m going out with Jack.”
“What? I thought he was going out with Marissa!”
“Yeah, he was, and now he’s with me.”
“What the f**k? You knew I have a huge crush on him!”
“Well, you said you weren’t ready to date yet, so I kinda… scooped him up once he was done with Marissa.”
“What the f**k?”
“I didn’t think you’d care, and besides, I didn’t really expect to see you here.”
“Whatever, here he comes.”
“Oh, hi Sandy. I didn’t know you’d be here.” Jack says.
“Yeah, it’s uh, a combined birthday party for me and Samson.”
“Oh, cool. So, the bar is serving anybody anything. No carding, nothing. He says as he takes a gulp of a cup of beer.
“Know what? I think I’m going to have a drink too.”
“What about waiting until you’re older, like you said?” Lois says.
“F**k it. It’s my birthday.” She goes to the bar. “Shot of whiskey.”
“Birthday girl?” The bartender says.
“Yeah.” The bartender pours a shot of whiskey, and she takes the shot. She makes a face. “Do you have any mixed drinks?”
“Yeah, sure. What do you want?”
“Do you have like, a menu or list or something?”
“Sure.” He hands it to her.
“Hmmm… Long Island Iced Tea sounds pretty good.”
“I wouldn’t recommend that for someone like you, maybe an appletini perhaps?”
“No thanks.”
“Alright, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. You remember where the bathroom is, right?”
“Of course, why?”
“In case you need to throw up.”
“I’ll be fine. Thank you.”
“Enjoy, birthday girl.” He puts a pink umbrella in her drink. She walks away, sipping her drink when she bumps into Christy.
“Hey, watch where- oh, it’s you.” Christy says.
“Please don’t punch me in the face today.” Sandra says.
“Give me a reason to and I will.”
“Fair enough, but thanks for not.”
“Whatev- hey, are you drinking?”
“What? This? Yeah, it’s a Long Island.”
“No f*****g way, I didn’t think I’d see the day. Miss goody too shoes breaking the rules.”
“Eh, it’s my birthday.”
“Oh, so if you were at a party on any other day, you wouldn’t drink?”
“Well, if it’s a party, of course I would. I mean, it’s a party, a special occasion, right?”
“So, if you went to a pool party in the middle of summer and somebody brought a case of beer, you’d have one?”
“Yeah. All parties are special occasions even when there’s no real reason for it cause you get to have a great time with your friends, and that’s important in friendships. You don’t necessarily need alcohol to have fun, but if you do, why not?”
“Hmm, maybe I’ve been wrong about you.” She sips her own drink. “Maybe you are cool enough to hang with us.”
“Really?”
“Well you haven’t embarrassed yourself so far, and you clean up rather nicely, I’m actually quite surprised. You know, if you looked like this every day or like us, you’d be so much more popular.”
“But I don’t wanna change who I am to fit in.”
“And that’s what makes you a dork. You can’t be like everyone else, you just have to be different, don’t you?”
“Different isn’t bad. A lot of the stuff you like was made by people who thought differently, and that’s what you don’t understand. If everyone did the same thing all the time, there would never be anything new.”
“You’re totally right, that just blew my mind.”
“Glad I could help.”
“We should hang out sometime, come to a party sometime next summer, that’s always the best time.” She says, finishing her drink and swaying.
“Come on, time for presents.” Samson says. Sandra excitedly rushes over to a chair next to Samson’s. She sits down, and when she does, Bimbleton puts a crown on each of their heads. “I figured, if I’m going to be king for a day, you could be a princess for a day.”
“Thank you.”
“No problem.” They get multitudes of expensive gifts: music cd’s, cd players, mp3 players, laptops, cell phones, jewelry, watches, and others. Finally, they unwrap their last presents. “Whoa, an autographed Willie McNillie football! Awesome! What’d you get?”
“The Gamestation X4e? This doesn’t come out for another couple of weeks! And games!”
“Cool, cool. Now it’s time for my present. Bring it in!” A car comes rolling out of one of the rooms. “So, what do you think? Aren’t I just the best?”
“No, Sammy, I- I can’t drive.”
“Why?”
“Because of my epilepsy.”
“Oh. Well then, thanks for the car, I love it.”
“Wh-what?”
“Well, if you can’t drive it, I’ll just take it. I can drive.”
“Did-did you-“
“Ok, everyone, my parents have asked that if you are intoxicated, to crash in a guest room. If you’re still here in the morning, expect breakfast. Thank you all for coming.” He says to the crowd.
“Did you set that up so you could get the car?”
“No, I don’t think so. Look, you’re reading way too into this and you’re drunk, so why don’t you go sleep it off, ok?”

November 20, 2003

Dear Diary:
So, turns out that Samson’s party was also my party and he arranged it… who knew? I had a pretty good time, and I actually got some dialogue with Christy and it didn’t involve violence. She didn’t make fun of me once, and even offered to hang out. I don’t know if it’s because she was drunk, or what. She said I could be cool too, so maybe if I switch up my style when I go to school on Monday, maybe I’ll finally be accepted. I mean, I don’t have to go overboard and dress like them, maybe if I just let my hair down and wear contacts, it’ll be enough cause I am definitely not wearing their prep rags. So, Lois showed up with Jack which was a total drag.
She knows I like him and she took him anyway. They disappeared for awhile, which concerns me. I had a couple drinks while I was there, which is the most I’ve ever had at once, and it felt nice. Maybe I’ll take Christy up on that offer and party with her. The presents were amazing, they were all from a bunch of people I didn’t even know and they were all super expensive, I easily got a few thousand dollars worth of merchandise for my birthday including a few hundred from a few of the cards. Rich people sure know how to have birthdays. I even got to keep this fake crown I got.
What bothered me was that Samson got a car for me, only to keep it which made me think he got it for himself and tried acting like he was giving it to me because it’s not like my epilepsy is a secret, Christy has even told me to ‘go have a seizure’ a few times, so I’m pretty sure that was all just show. Whatever, you know what? I’ll admit it. I had a good time overall and who knows? Maybe this will be a brand new road in life where I’m not bullied any more. Well, good night.

That Monday, Sandra is in school where she runs into Samson and his crew. “Hey, Sammy wait up.”
“Oh, hey birthday girl.” He says.
“I never thought you’d be able to hold that much liquor without puking.” Kat says.
“Yeah, and that you even drank in the first place.” Maritza says.
“Oh, well, you know. It was a party, soo…” Sandra says.
“Did you like the sword?” Leo asks.
“Yeah, I’ve got it hanging up in my room, thanks.”
“What did you want, dork?” Christy asks.
“I actually wanted to talk to you.”
“I’ll catch up, guys.” They walk away. “What?”
“So, I was kinda wondering, when you wanna hang out?”
“Oh, that.”
“Yeah, that.”
“Yeah…no… I was drunk.”
“But you said-“
“Yeah, I didn’t mean any of it.”
“Please tell me you’re kidding.”
“Um, no freak. Now are you done?”
“Yeah, I guess I am.”
“Good, now get out of my way.”

November 22, 2003

Dear Diary:
So, it was a lie, I should’ve known. I even let my hair down and wore contacts and it was all for nothing. She said she was just drunk and didn’t know what she was talking about, so I guess that’s that. I was cool for one night and one night only. Now it’s back to being picked on and bullied. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted, I guess. At least the rest of them weren’t b*****s and dicks to me, then again, anything is possible with them. Well, I’ll talk to you later I guess.

The next day at school, Sandra and Lois are talking during lunch. “Is Michael getting his lunch?” Lois asks.
“Yeah, why?”
“Then I gotta tell you something.”
“What? What?”
“I lost my virginity to Jack.”
“Are you serious?” Sandra looks crestfallen.
“Yeah, it was wonderful. He definitely knows what he’s doing.”
“What do you mean by that?”
“I mean, he’s been around already.”
“Oh, wow. Maybe I can lose my virginity to him one day…”
“What? Really? What about marriage?”
“Well of course I’d wanna date him first, I’m not just gonna go sleep with him. After all, I turned down Samson Alpha and he’s definitely ten times hotter than Jack.”
“Still, Jack isn’t bad himself.”
“Oh, really? Oh, s**t here comes Michael.”
“Damn school. They said they can’t afford to give me three extra cheeseburgers. I told them I’d just pay for them but they still said no.” He says, his stack of three cheeseburgers falling over.
“Well, Michael, I think you need to slow down anyway.” Sandra tells him.
“I’m bulking up, I’m thinking of joining the football team.”
Sandra laughs, “It’s the middle of November, the season’s almost over!”
“Fine, I’m hungry. Is that a crime?”
“I guess not.” Michael finishes his food before everyone else.
“At least the snack bar doesn’t have a limit.” He gets up and heads to the line for the snack bar.
“So how was it?” Sandra asks Lois.
“It was amazing, I highly recommend it.” Lois answers.
“That good?”
“Yeah, but you have to be ready for it.”
“Ready?”
“It’s- I don’t know, I’m a little embarrassed talking about this.”
“No, no, it’s fine. Go ahead.”
“He- s**t. Can’t, Michael’s coming back.”
“You know, they told me ten bucks is too much to spending for snacks every day. I told them I need the snacks to eat during the day to keep me going or I’ll crash.” Michael says.
“Sounds like you need to go to the doctor.” Sandra says.
“Nah, I’m fine.” He says as he stuffs his mouth full of chips and then farts. “So, Lois. You and mister new guy, huh?”
“Yeah Michael.” Lois says.
“Did he pork you yet?”
“Excuse me?”
“You just seem like the type of girl who would just give it up without much effort. Sandra seems like she would be a total prude though.”
“Well, I never!” Sandra says in shock.
“What? Did you guys forget? I’m a guy too. I have these thoughts too, you know I think you guys forget. Do you know what it’s like for a guy my age to be hanging out with two girls and being just friends? Everyone makes fun of me for it. You guys include me, but you still exclude me a bit because you’re girls so I don’t know what’s going on with you guys and I have to hear it from other people.”
“Michael, look, I like being your friend. It’s not that I don’t think you’re a great guy, it’s just that I’m not attracted to you.” Sandra says.
“It’s cause I’m fat, isn’t it?”
“No, It’s not that. Albert was chunky and I dated him. No, it’s just, we wouldn’t go well together.”
“I know what it is. It’s cause I’m not Charlie, isn’t it? That’s what it is! You miss him and I’m not good enough.”
“No, Michael- I just- I’m sorry.” She starts to cry and gets up and heads to the bathroom.
He turns to Lois, “And you, what’s your excuse? I would’ve done you in an instant, we could’ve lost our virginity together, it would’ve been romantic. But no, you give it to mister new guy.”
“How did you know?” Lois asks.
“I know his rep. Guys brag, and the stuff I hear is good stuff, I had no idea you were that flexible.”
“Oh my God!”
“First of all”, she slaps him “gross.” She gets up and grabs her backpack. “Second of all, JACK!” She finds Jack and slaps him. “We’re done.” She leaves the cafeteria.