Eleven

Reina,

Why shouldn't I have told the techs about Jordan? Who cares anyway. They already know I'm crazy. That's why I'm in the stupid insane asylum anyway. I know it's not really an insane asylum, but they have all the doors locked! It's crazy. I wish that you were with me or something.

I've made a new friend. She's my roommate, and no, she is not replacing you. Like that would ever happen, because I just met her. Her name is Lily and she loves to ride horses - just like you! She has three horses, I believe. She pretty much gets whatever she wants, so I don't know why she would ever want to be put in the hospital.

I've stopped eating, Reina. I can't keep getting fatter and fatter. I don't know why I always gain weight all the time, but it drives me nuts. I can't keep gaining weight because it makes me feel fat. I know you always tell me that I'm not fat, but I think I am. I don't know if the techs have noticed that I've stopped eating. I hope not because then they'd probably make me eat something or something like that.

Everywhere you go there are cameras and people watching you. I can't believe that the rooms are co-ed, but I guess you can't do anything about it. I hope that I get out sooner than six months. It's almost been a month and a half in here. I can't believe it. It's amazing. But it really sucks.

So what's been happening in your life? I hope that you still miss me and aren't mad at me for being here in the hospital.

I miss you so much, Reina. I can't wait to see you next week when you come to visit me with my family. I really don't want them to come, but I guess they have to come because it's supposed to be only family. But it's great that you are pretending to be my sister. It's kind of funny, but anyway, it's bed time right now. You're my best friend always, honey.

Love,

Beth xxxx