Yet today is so precious,
A today...full of wonders
A today...that holds adventure,
A today....that holds joys,
A today ...that holds pains
A today...that holds many gains
A today....that may be in vain
A today...that makes us smile
On how beautifully mysterious
And mysteriously beautiful
It can be for a while.
Yet this today
Is such a gift
A gift, that bonds us between
What we were
And may be.
What helps make life precious is the way it can change so dramatically. Never be come cynical and think that life is predictable.
Your words reveal that sunshine, cool breezes, healing's and love can blossom overnight.
Thank you for your inspiring write.
Peace,
Richie b.
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Thankyou so much, for your honest review, Richieb 😊
I much appreciate it!
And true.. read moreThankyou so much, for your honest review, Richieb 😊
I much appreciate it!
And true..Life's dramatically unpredictable, and that's what makes it interesting *smiles*
you are so very right...
i loved this poem of yours because it had reality in it...i loved it..keep it up girl.
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
It feels great when people let me me know that they liked the realness/ naturality of my writes..Tha.. read moreIt feels great when people let me me know that they liked the realness/ naturality of my writes..Thankyou so much for that compliment Wajiha, that made me smile 😊
I'm very glad you liked this piece, and sure! I'll keep up writing :)
It is amazing what a difference a day can make, one day life is full of stress and worries and the next it is all confidence and joy. It helps to be optimistic and dare to look for the bright side of all things. Besides if things go wrong today tomorrow is just a day away as the song from Annie says. See how your poem got me to thinking, that is what all writers want so great job Bravo! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap! Clap!
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Wow!!!😊
This is indeed the best review I've got for this piece so far! Thankyou, thankyou .. read moreWow!!!😊
This is indeed the best review I've got for this piece so far! Thankyou, thankyou so much dear friend for sharing your honest thoughts about this piece...You've actually got the complete and precise essence of this piece, and that makes me smile in joy!😊
Thankyou so much for such an positive review, and such appreciation😊
It indeed means a lot of me😇😊
7 Years Ago
It is sad that only a small percentage of the people who read a poem will leave a comment. I can und.. read moreIt is sad that only a small percentage of the people who read a poem will leave a comment. I can understand not being able to express in words what they think which is why I applaud system the better an audience likes something the longer they clap so if I really like something it gets five clap's if I like it but part of it went over my head and I didn't understand it then 4 claps and so on :~)
Most people here, just complete the quorom of finishing their RR list as soon as possible while othe.. read moreMost people here, just complete the quorom of finishing their RR list as soon as possible while others find a good piece to be good enough not be reviewed lol while there are others who are just curious to see the poem, half read it and then move on.Most of all, (what I observed here) is the more reviews you give, the most you get.There are just very few people here, Who actually take the time to read the writes thoroughly, and review honestly, and their words reveal that 😊 aftrall, there's a lot of difference between a formal line , and a big constructive, honest and helpful review, and a true writer/ poet can clearly make out the difference 😊
Thankyou so much for those five claps, and the wonderful review dear friend, I much appreciate your effort😊
Also I felt more than honoured and blessed to get such an appreciation from you!😊
Thanks a ton 😇😊
7 Years Ago
Well I have been writing poetry for over 5 decades having gotten started by my Aunt who wrote song l.. read moreWell I have been writing poetry for over 5 decades having gotten started by my Aunt who wrote song lyrics in the 1940's ad 50's and her circle of friends who where in the writing and publishing community at the time. I taught poetry for a few years it is like a best friend who is always there for me so I like to encourage other poets when I can my biggest problem is now having enough time to deal with all the read request I get most days, 3 hours a day is all the free time I have to give unless I get talked into coming out of retirement as my family has been trying. It was nice talking with you, I wish you good luck, good poetry and a good day :~)
7 Years Ago
Twas wonderful to know bout your writing journey 😊 I was tellingbout the actual thing that happen.. read moreTwas wonderful to know bout your writing journey 😊 I was tellingbout the actual thing that happens with reviewing here.btw, I appreciate the fact, that you stopped by, and inspired me by your review *smiles*
Thankyou so much, and same to you dear friend 😊
Nicely crafted thought. I think today and this moment is the only thing we have in our hand coz yesterday is past and for tomorrow we have to wait.
So your message is very relevant and inspiring..
Thank you for sharing..
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Thankyou so much, Bala😊
I'm very glad my write inspired you! This is the sweetest thing I .. read moreThankyou so much, Bala😊
I'm very glad my write inspired you! This is the sweetest thing I could hear for it. 😊
What helps make life precious is the way it can change so dramatically. Never be come cynical and think that life is predictable.
Your words reveal that sunshine, cool breezes, healing's and love can blossom overnight.
Thank you for your inspiring write.
Peace,
Richie b.
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Thankyou so much, for your honest review, Richieb 😊
I much appreciate it!
And true.. read moreThankyou so much, for your honest review, Richieb 😊
I much appreciate it!
And true..Life's dramatically unpredictable, and that's what makes it interesting *smiles*
This is a fun read. Very solemn, and quite profound. Your message is as strong as the imagery, but the musicality is a bit wonky here and there. Fix the musicality and this would definitely be a poetic gem. Well done.
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Thankyou for sharing your honest opinion, emi 😊 I much appreciate your visit and review.
<.. read moreThankyou for sharing your honest opinion, emi 😊 I much appreciate your visit and review.
Would you please do me a favor of sending me a mail suggesting how can I fix the musicality of this piece? I'll be really glad to learn from you😊
Thanx in advance.
-Saumya
7 Years Ago
Why do it privately, when all could learn from it, too, should they want to know.
Mus.. read moreWhy do it privately, when all could learn from it, too, should they want to know.
Musicality is similar to rhythm, but it's not the same. It's measured the same way, starting from the first line, and marking out its flow with the rest of the poem. But you're not so much looking for iambic feet or anapaestic rhythms, but rather looking for fluidity, and ensuring that it flows smoothly from line to line and thought to thought by hit every important word where necessary. Your first stanza is great.....your second stanza is one syllable too much....and in musicality, one syllable matters. You can detect it if you listen closely to how the proper stresses of the words. The "another" gives a good stray from how the first stanza flows (the second stanza, if following from the first, should imitate the first in flow, but may, if it works, tweak it a bit)....so it's a good stray, but "morrow" makes it too much of a mouthful.
The "A today..." lines are relatively great. The first line of that stanza, doesn't need any tweaks. Nor does the first "A today". The second does, for it's not consistent with the first. And in Poetry, as long as you have an antecedent, you do not need to repeat words. The first "A today" is "full of wonders" the second is "that holds adventure". Now with the "full of" of the first, you can imply it by simply saying " of adventure(s)". The next two are fine. The following two are not only two syllables two much, those syllables don't add anything to the poem. "many" and "may be" can be taken out (and in "may be"'s place put "that's in vain"), for what remains is more powerful. Lastly in the third stanza, the second time "a gift" appears can be taken out. It's unnecessary repetition, and the musicality is marred. Try reading it, once you've made the tweaks, and you shall hear the difference, and understand what I mean when I talk about musicality (and how it's not quite the same as rhythm).
live for today,it`s all we can plan on
for tomorrow may not come
Posted 7 Years Ago
7 Years Ago
Exactly! Thankyou for sharing your thoughts, Ron 😊
I'm glad you enjoyed reading this write.. read moreExactly! Thankyou for sharing your thoughts, Ron 😊
I'm glad you enjoyed reading this write!
Hopeful and positive words dear Poet. I did like them. Nice flow of thoughts led to strong ending. Thank you Saumya for sharing the amazing poetry.
Coyote
Posted 7 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
7 Years Ago
Thankyou so much, Coyote😊
I'm very glad you liked this piece a lot.
Hi all:)
this is me....Saumya
well, i don't have much to tell you all about me..
but yes to start with,
I love writing & painting.(you can find some of my paintings in the "my photos" section of.. more..