Ask Your Heart...

Ask Your Heart...

A Poem by Saumya
"

easiest way to deal with life..

"
When nothing goes well in life,
and, you don't know, why,
just take, a deep sigh,
sit, and, ask yourself, why..?

When you have done,
everything, you could do,
and still feel, deprived,
just take, a deep sigh,
sit, and ask your heart, why..?

When everything you planned,
went totally wrong,
and you don't know, why,
just take, a deep sigh,
sit, and ask your heart, why..?

When all you thought,
did no more last,
and you don't know, why,
just take, a deep sigh,
sit, and ask your heart, why..?

Heart, you know, is a gift from God,
to all those beings,who want to last...

He gave us, body, and  soul,
but gave the heart,
to make these pure.....

The thoughts, and advices,
which arises in your heart,
are the words,
directly from God..!!

So, always listen,
to your heart,
because, its the best gift,
to you, from, God..

Trust it,
Hear it,
follow it,
and, you'll be, your best friend in need..
and, moreover,
A great, Human being indeed...!

© 2013 Saumya


Author's Note

Saumya
pleeeeeeease give your reviews , and,i request this to every reader
and it would be great, if you could also rate it....!!

My Review

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Featured Review

This is a poem with a wise message. If could use a little more rhythm. I wrote two verses that you may keep for your self to show you what I mean by more rhythm. I overlapped the rhyme using a seven syllable line followed by a five syllable line where all accents match in meter. This may be sung as a song:

Heart

When there's trouble in your life
just take a deep sigh.
Medication for your strife
may be found nearby.

Your best guide is deep inside,
an eternal tie,
where no truths may ever hide.
Just ask your heart why.



Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.




Reviews

Nicely done.

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

i loved your this piece the most. it is smooth, well organised, a good start and the way it blends in and fades away at the end. beautiful work :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

In the short time you've been in the Cafe your writing has grown from okay and promising to something really worthy, wonderful and more. You've the potential to outstrip many of the players in here.. you obviously work very hard at whatever you write these days. Tis super-thoughtful too.

Two minor typos you might like to note: 'The thoughts, and (advices,)~ which (arises) in your heart,
are the words, ~ directly from God..!!' should read, advice and arise. :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


A very beautiful message Saumya, the overuse of commas and punctuation is a bit distracting, but I know you did it to slow the reader down to create a languid rhythm where the words hang for a moment to be absorbed. I felt that this could easily be turned into song. You could try a different format to this that would afford less punctuation and still have the same impact.
Something like this maybe:
"When nothing goes well in life,
and you don't know why,
just take a deep sigh,
sit and ask yourself,
why?"

or

"When nothing goes well in life
and you don't know
why
just take
a deep sigh
sit
ask yourself
why?"



Posted 11 Years Ago


I like this, it is a good message, though not everyone has a "pure" heart and I think it's only a friend when God is inside it, making God your best friend not your actual heart. I'm not trying to put this piece down or anything, those are just my thoughts.

Good Job

Posted 11 Years Ago


Saumya

11 Years Ago

thank you dear, for the precious review..!!!
glad you liked it..!!
:)
~*~Peace Keeper~*~

11 Years Ago

You're welcome ^^
Saumya

11 Years Ago

:)
a pleasing read well written

Posted 11 Years Ago


Great message, tempo and rythm to this poem,

i love it :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


This is a poem with a wise message. If could use a little more rhythm. I wrote two verses that you may keep for your self to show you what I mean by more rhythm. I overlapped the rhyme using a seven syllable line followed by a five syllable line where all accents match in meter. This may be sung as a song:

Heart

When there's trouble in your life
just take a deep sigh.
Medication for your strife
may be found nearby.

Your best guide is deep inside,
an eternal tie,
where no truths may ever hide.
Just ask your heart why.



Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Nicely done!! Keep writing :)

Posted 11 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

Thank you for a lovely expression of hope and faith.

Posted 11 Years Ago



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Added on May 22, 2013
Last Updated on May 22, 2013

Author

Saumya
Saumya

India



About
Hi all:) this is me....Saumya well, i don't have much to tell you all about me.. but yes to start with, I love writing & painting.(you can find some of my paintings in the "my photos" section of.. more..

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