Feelings [Finally Expressed]

8 January 2012

Very kind. Funny. Smart. Perfect for any girl but me. It takes every muscle, bone in my body to even get myself to sit by him. Sometimes, I feel as though he’s afraid of me. Like I’m diseased to the touch. Buddy, it’s okay to touch my shoulder or hold my hand. Look in my eyes and make me do the same, no matter my protesting.

I say that, yet I don’t know if I’m ready for that. For you to be that one.

But maybe then I can let you occupy that part of my brain that is plagued with false feelings and an invisible, shadowed, non-existent face. Help me realize this CAN happen for me, but not that this is my only choice, only chance. I don’t want to settle. Give me reason to fall for you too, since you’re not the first to touch my heart, just the first to actually reach for it. The first I unconsciously have to push away. Instead, be the first to break down the barrier.