dear caroline

who are you who am i THIS ISNT FINISHED

6/5/14

dearly beloved, 

i cannot get my overworked mind away from the thought of you, or should i look at it as an illusion. i keep taking personality tests to make sure im still the same person. lately everything makes me so sad. perhaps im just emotional. i dont know who you are so i've been taking clues and using my veins to sew together evidence that you are real and they were wrong about my insanity. i can see it silhouetted, an olive dress and brown eyes which you've always hated. although they are common, they were very elegant and complimented you like a desperate highschool boy. i can see your bleached heels leaping from the bridges. you were there i promise. even if you arent in any records or cant be proven real, you were very real to me. my dear you are the most elegant strand of dna and i crave every inch of you. nothing can really describe the way i feel other than instrumentals. i dont need words to scream how much you mean to me. theyre taking me away today and all i have left is this notebook. with the only thing i am given i will write to you because i know you can hear me. i know my handwritten prayers are being sung to you by the angels because if they werent why else would i be here. you have to hear me. i am in love with you and only you. my golden baby , please dont jump. i can close my eyes and hold you once again, the only sound would be our breathing because words didnt need to be said. my fingers tracing your thigh speaks volumes. we were both pure, virgins, but that didnt matter. we didnt need to be physical to prove how strongly we felt. i still wake up each night to make sure your still breathing, even though you're not here. i suppose now im just doing it for myself. they're giving me pills now and i have to go. goodnight my love, you are beautiful caroline.

 i love u, signed adam